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03-31-2002, 03:39 PM | #1 |
Pile O'Bones
Join Date: Mar 2002
Posts: 16
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Pippin's *touch and die* Diary
Hi, I been reading some of the Secret diaries of the LOTR characters, and I really enjoyed them. So, I thought it would be cool if we could compose Pippin's diary with everyone contributing a day. Just a note: keep it clean or don't bother posting it. Thanx! [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]
Just to start off: DAY ONE Merry won't shut up. I mean, c'mon they were only a couple of mushrooms, right? On the way to Bree, kicked stone and ended up with foot in mouth. Cannot eat for six days. Merry is laughing. I hate him. [ April 01, 2002: Message edited by: Iaragarwen ] [ April 01, 2002: Message edited by: Iaragarwen ]
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'elen sila lumenn omentielvo' 'a star shines on the hour of our meeting' |
03-31-2002, 04:11 PM | #2 |
Ghost Eldaran Queen
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: A remote mountain in Valinor
Posts: 353
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DAY TWO
This Prancing Pony place is awesome. They have PINTS!!!!! Frodo sure is in sulky mood. Must get him new jewelry. And who's that guy that keeps staring at us in the corner? He's giving me the creeps! Now wait a minute, where'd Frodo go? He was just here, I swear! ARGH!
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A lelyat, wen! (Quenya Elvish for "You go, girl!" |
03-31-2002, 04:35 PM | #3 |
Ghastly Neekerbreeker
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: the banks of the mighty Scioto
Posts: 1,751
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What have I gotten myself into!!! Everywhere I look there are giants trying to kill me, or giving me funny looks like they'd LIKE to kill me. Me old dad always said that Men were dangerous, but he never told me they have NO sense of humor!
Frodo and Sam have turned into a total drags, too. They used to be such party animals, but now they're jumping at every loud noise and looking over their shoulders. I'd head back to Buckland right now, if I could read a map. We'll, we're taking off again in the morning, but I'm not going anywhere without a few drinks in me. Gotta see if Barliman can slip a little something in my flask "for the road". [ March 31, 2002: Message edited by: Birdland ] |
03-31-2002, 04:36 PM | #4 |
Wight
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DAY THREE:
Started out on the road with "Strider". These people don't eat. I want some afternoon tea, supper, dinner, etc., and I get hit in the head with an apple. Where's the justice in Middle-Earth? Merry still won't shut up and Frodo is still moody. This is going to be a real fun trip.
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Pippin and Merry rule! -- Lissenen ar' maska'lalaith tenna' lye omentuva! |
03-31-2002, 05:01 PM | #5 |
Wight
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Can I do another one? This is kinda fun....
DAY FOUR: We're still walking. And walking. And walking. And walking.
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Pippin and Merry rule! -- Lissenen ar' maska'lalaith tenna' lye omentuva! |
03-31-2002, 05:58 PM | #6 |
Haunting Spirit
Join Date: Jan 2002
Posts: 70
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You guys are good. Me can't think of anything, yet. ::Muh ha ha::
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"Where is the horse and the rider, where is the horn that was blowing, they have passed like rain on the mountains, like wind in the meadow, the days are damned in the west? behind the hills? there are shadows... " |
03-31-2002, 06:10 PM | #7 |
Haunting Spirit
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: In a messy room on the third floor.
Posts: 67
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DAY 5
More walking. Got in trouble with Strider for tripping Merry, but I though it was rather funny. I swear, if something doesn't happen soon...... Maybe I can attract some Nazgul; at least THEY have cool horses.... [ March 31, 2002: Message edited by: Niere-Teleliniel ]
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He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it.... ~Douglas Adams |
03-31-2002, 06:50 PM | #8 |
Shade of Carn Dûm
Join Date: Mar 2002
Posts: 314
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DAY 6
We walk some more. My feet are sore but nobody cares. We only get three meals a day; what is Strider trying to do, starve me? Merry pushed me into a stream today and everybody laughed. But when I put a spider in Merry's sleeping bag Strider made me clean all the dishes. I hate being the youngest. I think I'll do something really stupid just to show them. Maybe I'll send up a few flares tonight. That's sure to attract something good and scary for Strider to deal with.
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Soli Deo Gloria |
03-31-2002, 07:14 PM | #9 |
Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: In a box with a fox
Posts: 1,347
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Day 7
Got to weathertop, Frodo got ash on my Tomatoes too! It serves him right to be stabbed with a knife just for that. Haven't met up with Gandalf yet, but maybe that is a good thing. Frodo very moody
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"Wake up! Wake up! Wake up, sleepies, we must go, yes, we must go at once." |
03-31-2002, 08:17 PM | #10 |
Ghastly Neekerbreeker
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: the banks of the mighty Scioto
Posts: 1,751
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Well, Aragorn says Frodo's being turned into a Wraith, and is not just moody, so the whoopie cushion in the sleeping bag joke was NOT going to cheer him up.
Well ex-cuuuusssee meeee, Dr. Strider! Now Merry's getting into the whole "ooooh, were on a dangerous mission" shctick, too. Like I don't know who slipped Sam the dribble glass at supper last night. Wish I was back in Buckland! |
03-31-2002, 08:17 PM | #11 |
Wight
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DAY EIGHT:
Frodo in mortal danger with that injury. Oooh, I went a couple HOURS without eating and I was in mortal danger. But of course, who cares about the hobbit in the back! Yeah, I'm probably just bait for good old Sauron...the life I live...
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Pippin and Merry rule! -- Lissenen ar' maska'lalaith tenna' lye omentuva! |
03-31-2002, 08:28 PM | #12 |
Haunting Spirit
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We're at Rivendell now. They have some very strange buildings here. Anyways, Frodo got invited to some secret council or something, so I figure "I have to follow him around, so why can't I find out what's going on?"
Merry and me listened in on it: there was a lot of arguing over something, and one of the dwarfs broke his axe trying to split a pillar in half. I swear, those dwarfs don't have half a brain in their heads. Merry told me I was stupid, but he's not the one who got hit in the head with an apple, now is he?
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"And at night, I cruise the streets of Gotham City in my Davemobile" -Dave Nelson |
03-31-2002, 08:36 PM | #13 |
Wight
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DAY NINE:
(I'm using Arwen, not the other guy...cuz i forget his name and everything) Arwen came and took Frodo. Black Riders chasing him. You know, for sake of this boring quest, I hope they get him. He was getting really annoying...I had a hard time keeping a straight face when I heard he might die. Well good! No more Mordor chasing! But no! They just don't seem to get that!!
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Pippin and Merry rule! -- Lissenen ar' maska'lalaith tenna' lye omentuva! |
03-31-2002, 08:40 PM | #14 |
Haunting Spirit
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: In a messy room on the third floor.
Posts: 67
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HOLD IT! WE WERE IN RIVENDELL!! DONT MESS WITH MY HEAD! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
Merry had to open his big trap, and we're offagain. Now on top of our already pathetic company, we have do deal with a snotty daddy's-boy, a pretty-boy elf, and a dwarf with an attitude! On the plus side, we've got Gandalf again( the perfect subject for my stash of garlic gum) And Boromir's horn suuuuure looks tempting. I may have to play a little wake-up call tomorrow morning.... [ March 31, 2002: Message edited by: Niere-Teleliniel ]
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He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it.... ~Douglas Adams |
03-31-2002, 08:45 PM | #15 |
Wight
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DAY TWELVE:
We're heading out of Rivendell. Wonderful stay, but could it last? No, of course not!! Off to the wilderlands to be killed!! Yay!!! Merry won't shut up (again) and Frodo is moodier then ever. Now I have even more people around me. An elf, two men, a wizard, and a dwarf! Not to mention four hobbits!! I think they should make a hiking song...it would go a little something like this.. Oh off to Mordor we go Off to Mordor we go Hi ho cheerio! Off to mordor to be killed we go! I wish I was in Buckland.
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Pippin and Merry rule! -- Lissenen ar' maska'lalaith tenna' lye omentuva! |
03-31-2002, 08:51 PM | #16 |
Wight
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DAY THIRTEEN:
More and more crap from Gandalf. He really needs to lighten up. But of course I don't mean that literally, but they STILL think I'm the one who lit up his cape---well I DID say he needed to lighten up, didn't I?
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Pippin and Merry rule! -- Lissenen ar' maska'lalaith tenna' lye omentuva! |
03-31-2002, 08:53 PM | #17 |
Wight
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Oh poopy...I gotta go!! BUt I had fun doing this!! Hahah, keep going!! You guys are hilarious!!!
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Pippin and Merry rule! -- Lissenen ar' maska'lalaith tenna' lye omentuva! |
03-31-2002, 09:23 PM | #18 |
Shade of Carn Dûm
Join Date: Mar 2002
Posts: 314
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DAY FOURTEEN:
I got too close to the campfire and singed my foot hair. Very unattractive. Good thing there's not a girl within about a hundred miles, give or take a thousand. We're heading toward the Misty Mountains. That means that not only will I starve, but I'll freeze too. Lembas are getting really old. Sam's made them fried, broiled, baked, steamed, and stewed, and they still taste the same. The snobby elf keeps trying to use me as a foot stool. He got mud and leaves all over my hair and in my ears. Again, very unattractive. Oh, well, at least I comb my hair, unlike a certain ranger I know. Merry's being a bore. He wouldn't even dress up like monsters with me so we could try to scare Frodo (still moody, by the way). Well, I'll try to get some sleep now. Of course, Gandalf will probably get some brilliant idea to start traveling again in the middle of the night.
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Soli Deo Gloria |
03-31-2002, 09:40 PM | #19 |
Fair and Cold
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DAY FIFTEEN:
A big bruhaha over a bunch of stupid birds. Legolas was freaking out because one smart little birdie pooped in his pretty hair. Ha! Knew the spies of Saruman were good for something! Gandalf's latest brilliant idea is to climb Caradrahaha...Whatever that stupid mountain is called. I asked him, "do I look like a scherpa to you?" but he threatened to turn me into something "unnatural." Now am concentrating very hard on not freezing to death. Boromir has become quite annoying-keeps staring at Frodo, drooling excessively, and mumbling something about "One Ring to rule them all..." I told him he should seek professional help, or at the very least do us all a favor and throw himself off the mountain. ...He can take Legolas with him while he's at it! The dratted Elf is nancing about on top of the snow, while we struggle through it like drowning kittens. He, apparently, weighs nothing, stupid anorexic git! Blast this cold! For future reference: never take directions from a Wizard.
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~The beginning is the word and the end is silence. And in between are all the stories. This is one of mine~ |
03-31-2002, 10:01 PM | #20 |
Candle of the Marshes
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Flyover Country
Posts: 780
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DAY SIXTEEN:
Great, just great. The Pass of Carad- whatever it's called - didn't work out. There was a blizzard which knocked down half the mountain and the rocks almost squashed us as flat as pancakes (mmm...pancakes...how long since I've had those? Eru, but I miss the Great Smials). Now, honestly, I could have told you we were running a risk by going up there, but would anyone listen to me if I said "Excuse me, but that's an awfully high a snowy mountain, and kinda *exposed* don't you think?" No, it'd just be "Fool of Took, go help Sam clean up after Bill so nobody can track us through his, um, leavings." Grr. Even Merry gets more respect. So now we're going through the Mines of Moria, which is going to be even more fun than Weathertop, judging by the way Gandalf and Aragorn are turning green. Assuming we ever get *in* of course. Old Gandalf has been hammering on the door and trying passwords for about three hours now; can't remember the password, or so he claims. You'd think a wizard would know, wouldn't you? I think he's bluffing; really wants to get us back to Carad-whatever. Fat chance. Maybe he'll get it soon. I'm really, really hungry. Even Bill is starting to look kind of appetizing - hey! Where's Sam sending him off to? Hey, HEY!
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Father, dear Father, if you see fit, We'll send my love to college for one year yet Tie blue ribbons all about his head, To let the ladies know that he's married. |
03-31-2002, 10:46 PM | #21 |
Ghastly Neekerbreeker
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: the banks of the mighty Scioto
Posts: 1,751
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Well, after four hours Mr. Wizard finally realized you had to say "Friend", which opened the door and called up some hobbit-eating freak out of the water. Of course, they tried to pin it on my throwing rocks in the pond, but I wasn't the one screaming "Mellon" like a deaf tourist in Lorien.
For once I wish hobbits had invented shoes! You don't even want to know what I've stepped in in this place. Gimli's blubbering, and Frodo's spending all his time hanging out with the giants. Try getting an pineal gland, Ring-Boy! Maybe then they'll take you seriously. I'm so bored! Nothing to do but pitch rocks down a well. |
04-01-2002, 08:37 AM | #22 |
Shade of Carn Dûm
Join Date: Mar 2002
Posts: 314
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DAY EIGHTEEN:
Nobody likes me, everyone hates me, I think I'll go eat Neekerbreekers. All I did was drop one lousy stone down a well and every Orc in Middle-earth decided to come and attack us. What did they expect? I'm a young hobbit showing a healthy sense of curiosity. How was I supposed to know that they would hear one little stone with all the huffing and mumbling Gandalf was doing? Then this ugly guy stabbed Frodo with a spear and he didn't even die. Come to find out he has some super special armor that nobody else has. Downright selfish of him, if you ask me, which you won't, since I'm a "Fool of a Took," as the newly-departed Gandalf called me. Yep, he's gone. Fell down an abyss. He'll probably be back to haunt me. But it was a lot of fun to hear the stupid elf scream "Ai! Ai!" like a little girl when the Balrog crashed through the wall. Now Strider's in charge again. I guess it's kitchen patroll duty for the rest of the journey for me. I will now go back to feeling sorry for myself because of course, this is all my fault.
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Soli Deo Gloria |
04-01-2002, 08:42 AM | #23 |
Guest
Posts: n/a
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"YOU FOOL OF A TOOK! THROW YOURSELF IN NEXT TIME!" was what I got when Gandalf found my dropping rocks into that well I was talking about. Well it's alot more fun than listening to him read about all these dwarves being locked inside Moria. Merry was really into it. I hate him.
HEY! Gandalf and Aragorn think there're orcs in here! Time to go hide someplace safe and watch the action! |
04-01-2002, 08:43 AM | #24 |
Guest
Posts: n/a
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Sorry Elanor! Must've posted same time as you.
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04-01-2002, 08:47 AM | #25 |
Guest
Posts: n/a
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Now we're paddling down a really stupid river in really stupid canoes and everything is really stupid and Strider is making me take first watch tonight.
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04-01-2002, 11:15 AM | #26 |
Wight
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Everyone is crying. What's the big deal? That big fat wizard is the one that almost froze us to death and almost got us attacked by those Wargs because he couldn't get it through his thick head that you had to say "friend" which probably wasn't a good idea anyway, because we nearly were killed by orcs and a really big, bad smelling mountain troll. Not to mention a Balrog, who really needs a breath mint. But before him, I think Gimli needs one first. I keep my distance. But of course blame all this on the Took. I'm a Fool of a Took, after all. Now we're heading to this wooded area, the "Golden Wood". Whatever.
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Pippin and Merry rule! -- Lissenen ar' maska'lalaith tenna' lye omentuva! |
04-01-2002, 11:18 AM | #27 |
Wight
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Galadriel isn't so great. She has something hanging out of her nose, but, I shouldn't say anything, or I'll just be a bigger fool of a Took for mentioning anything to disgrace her "wondrous beauty". Celeborn looks constipated, and I have to sleep in a tree. And Frodo doesn't want to leave. He's mood AND has a bad sense of judgement. SAURON COME KILL US NOW!
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Pippin and Merry rule! -- Lissenen ar' maska'lalaith tenna' lye omentuva! |
04-01-2002, 11:21 AM | #28 |
Wight
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Now we're floating down a river, and there are two big statues that have their hands out. Aragorn and Boromir are fascinated, but then, they are a little on the pyscho side, so it's really not that great. Did they ever stop and think they have their hands out for a reason? You know, like, forbidding us to go any further? Of course not. I'm just the stupid hobbit who would like to see the Shire again. But that's pushing it, I guess.
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Pippin and Merry rule! -- Lissenen ar' maska'lalaith tenna' lye omentuva! |
04-01-2002, 11:25 AM | #29 |
Wight
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Today was the best day of my life. Orcs come into camp, and of course, brave me and Merry have to go saving Frodo and Sam by waving our hands and making the Orcs take US captive instead. So now I am lying in the dark by a smelly Orc writing this. Boromir died, but it was for the best, I think. He attacked Frodo. I saw that coming, but nobody ever listens to me. And NOW look at us. Uh-oh, Smelly here just cut the cheese....MUST...GET...AIR....
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Pippin and Merry rule! -- Lissenen ar' maska'lalaith tenna' lye omentuva! |
04-01-2002, 11:32 AM | #30 |
Wight
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Traveling with Orcs is the worst possible thing you can imagine. I took my brooch and left it in the grass for Aragorn and the elf and dwarf to find. How much do you want to bet that they will never find us and I will die of suffacation? The smell will kill any weak hearted. Merry is smiling. He needs to see a shrink.
Some Orcs killed each other. We camped there for the night. The smell was worse, and Smelly here is snoring. It's worse then thunder.
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Pippin and Merry rule! -- Lissenen ar' maska'lalaith tenna' lye omentuva! |
04-01-2002, 12:22 PM | #31 |
Ghost of a Smile
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I miss my brooch, but Merry keeps on going on and on about Gandalf and Boromir - for goodness sake, haven't we got better things to moan about - like the fact that I haven't eaten second breakfast for about 100 days!
Merry should get his priorities sorted out! [ April 01, 2002: Message edited by: Starbreeze ] [ April 01, 2002: Message edited by: Starbreeze ]
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Do not tamper with the affairs of wizards, they are not all that subtle - Terry Pratchett To write is to make dreams, to make dreams is to awaken the fantasy of the mind, to awaken the mind is to be a master. |
04-01-2002, 02:57 PM | #32 |
Wight
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that drink of theirs is not good at all. Merry won't shut up, and I am still starving! Miss my brooch.
I wish I was back in Buckland. But now we are probably just going to be killed, Merry and me. One of the orcs is searching through our stuff, but I don't know in search for what. Merry is coming up with the most impossible escape-plans all the time, but since we don't have wings, and since the ropes won't loosen up straigh away, I suppose we will never get out of here. I am turning out to be a pessimist, but that is just because I miss the Shire and especially Buckland.. and second breakfast.. pancakes..
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Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, if he gets angry, he'll be a mile away - and barefoot. |
04-01-2002, 03:58 PM | #33 |
Shade of Carn Dûm
Join Date: Mar 2002
Posts: 314
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I think I'll write out my will and testiment soon. Half the orcs here want to kill us now, and the other half want to take us back to Saru-whats-his-name so he can kill us slowly. Merry is starting to giggle and talk to himself. I think the poor guy's cracking up. Ah, what I wouldn't do for elevenses right now...
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Soli Deo Gloria |
04-01-2002, 04:43 PM | #34 |
Wight
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I haven't written in my diary for two days now---the reason is pretty stupid. These big shot "Riders of Rohan" came prancing in on their big ponies and killed every one of the Orcs. We escaped (barely--these guys must be blind--they take hobbits for Orcs--I'm hurt) and now are traveling in this wierd forest. Merry is humming. I ask him about it and what does he say? Because we escaped the Orcs! Well this is soo much better! Wandering aimlessly in the woods--wasn't that what we were doing when we ran into Frodo in the first place? And NOW look at us. Hope help comes soon. Someone with some sense that is.
Ahh, what I wouldn't do for some good old hobbit tea right now. Merry is driving me mad and I wish I were in Buckland.
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Pippin and Merry rule! -- Lissenen ar' maska'lalaith tenna' lye omentuva! |
04-01-2002, 05:53 PM | #35 |
Shade of Carn Dûm
Join Date: Mar 2002
Posts: 314
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We were walking in the woods today and Merry said he saw eyes in the trees, so I thought he had finally lost it. Turns out the trees do have eyes and they aren't trees; they're Ents. I've met so many wierd tree-things in the past few months that I expect to be traumatized for life. The good thing is that these Ents hate Saruman as much as we do. The bad thing is that I can't let them see me writing in my diary because paper's made of tree parts. Terribly touchy. Treebeard, their leader, asked me how I'd like it if he wrote on sheets made of hobbit gut. I told him I wouldn't mind as long as it was 100% recyclable. Well, if you ask a stupid (not to metion hypothetical) question, you should expect a stupid answer. I'm probably risking my head by writing now. The food here is strange. I feel like I'm being stretched out. Must be some stupid diet formula. How I hate this journey!
[ April 01, 2002: Message edited by: ElanorGamgee ]
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Soli Deo Gloria |
04-01-2002, 06:05 PM | #36 |
Guest
Posts: n/a
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All Treebeard feeds Merry and me is entdraught! Hobbits have to eat too, you know! He makes a big deal about how he's never heard of hobbits and he's so slow! Us hobbits like to keep things going and he calls it "hasty". I most certainly am NOT impatient! Its driving me crazy how ents are so slow! And they make me feel even shorter than I felt when I was around the fellowship. Right now Treebeard is outside standing under a waterfall with his arms up....I think he might be a little crazy... Fortunately, he's outside so I got the chance to write in my diary without being frowned upon.
Merry saw me writing and he keeps on trying to see my diary! Well he won't, not if I can help it! Diaries are personal things and I can't have Merry reading all my thoughts... I miss the Shire. I miss real food and the lembas is really starting to get to me, although I must say that its better than this liquid that the ents drink. Treebeard's coming back so I better stop writing. |
04-01-2002, 07:57 PM | #37 |
Haunting Spirit
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These Ents are really getting annoying. All this hooming and non hastiness is just not for me. While the Ents are meeting and hooming away, me and Merry are so bored that we have staring contests that last for hours on end.(I've won most of the time.) We started playing hide and go seek a couple hours ago, just for a change of pace (Merry's eye balls were drying out.) I was "it" and let Merry go hide. I looked for him for about five minutes, then took a nap. I started writing in here about 20 minutes ago and he still hasn't come back yet. What a moron! [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img]
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"We are raised to honor all the wrong explorers and discoverers- thieves planting flags, murderers carrying crosses. Let us at last praise the colonizers of dreams." |
04-01-2002, 09:53 PM | #38 |
Pile O'Bones
Join Date: Mar 2002
Posts: 16
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LOL! Wow you guys, these are great! I'll bet we'll finish the trilogy by the time this forum stops [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img] I didn't expect sooo many responses in one day. [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]
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'elen sila lumenn omentielvo' 'a star shines on the hour of our meeting' |
04-02-2002, 02:38 AM | #39 |
Wight
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Merry came back just after finished writing that last part. I merely had enough time to hide the diary. Oh well. I really miss second breakfast. Treebeard doesn't seem to be able to stop talking! Every time we ask him something, like who Saruman is, he gives us an answer that takes at lesat half an hour, while we could have made the same answer in ten minutes, or less!
Anyway, Treebeard seems to start to decide now, and he wants to attack Isengard! woo-hoo! That will make sure those stupid orcs'll have what they deserve! Wish I was back in Buckland!
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Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, if he gets angry, he'll be a mile away - and barefoot. |
04-02-2002, 02:56 AM | #40 |
Haunting Spirit
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Middle Earth
Posts: 82
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Treebeard gave us to this other Ent, so he could look after us instead. He's not quite as boring as Treebeard, but there's nothing to do except listen to the Ents standing in a clearing going 'Hooomm, ha-ho, hroom,' etc. Merry still hasn't come back. It's probably for the best.
I want my second breakfast! |
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