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Visit The *EVEN NEWER* Barrow-Downs Photo Page |
07-09-2005, 06:17 AM
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#1 |
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Princess of Skwerlz
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: where the Sea is eastwards (WtR: 6060 miles)
Posts: 7,500
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This Barrow-Downer's real name is...
Haven’t you caught yourself wondering if someone from the LotR movies, a known Tolkien scholar, or some other VIP comes to the Downs, unbeknownst to the rest of us? I have uncovered evidence of some who are masquerading behind their screen names to hide their true identity! Careful observation has led me to following conclusions:
The Saucepan Man's real name is… Peter Jackson! Why else would he so staunchly defend the movies in the face of all the opposition he gets? His lawyer mask is so convincing because he has had plenty of experience with law suits in securing the movie rights. Bęthberry’s real name is… Madonna! She comes to the Downs when she wearies of the glamorous life of a star, admired only for her looks, in hopes of finding friends online who will like her for her personality. Her choice of nickname brought me to this conclusion – a singer who has changed identities so often would naturally choose to be a member of an enigmatic family specialized in song! And doesn’t it strike you as more than a coincidence that she began writing children’s books in real life after having gained RPG experience here?! Mister Underhill’s real name is… Orlando Bloom! You didn’t think Orly could be so erudite, intelligent, and knowledgeable about the books? Well, his agent had to dumb him down; in order to get the role in LotR, he had to promise not to spoil his swoon image by scaring away the teenyboppers with utterances they don’t understand. Interestingly, his wonderful posts are now few and far between, alas! What gave this away to me? In his early, pre-movie days here on the Downs, he rashly admitted to “doing some occasional acting”. the phantom’s real name is… Michael Martinez! He comes here secretly when he’s tired of his own learned treatises and wants to have fun on the Mirth forum. Transforming between these two guises has given him the knack for playing on the Werewolf games. What clued me in on this one? Well, MM just can’t completely shake off that ‘light’ touch of arrogance… I shall continue my search for mystery identities and invite those who are interested to join in. Remember though, this is not the place for mere speculation! You must present conclusive evidence!!
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'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...' |
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07-09-2005, 08:10 AM
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#2 |
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Blithe Spirit
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 2,779
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You know, I was wondering if this gentleman could a barrowdowner. If so, which one?
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Out went the candle, and we were left darkling |
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08-02-2005, 03:19 PM
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#3 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 3,448
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well, actually my real name iss (ahem clears throat) Orlando Bloom (girls swoon)
Actually yes I have thought about this many-a-time in fact I am convinced J.R.R.Tolkien's spirit haunts the downs as a green casper like ghosts(pretends to yawn and points at BarrowWight)
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Morsul the Resurrected |
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08-02-2005, 07:14 PM
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#4 |
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La Belle Dame sans Merci
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: perpetual uncertainty
Posts: 5,517
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Sharku, though many times goes by stage names, was born as one "Christopher Lee". It is evident by his sparse and eloquent posts. To new members, he may seem cold and aloof, but to those of the old guard, they remember "the days", and the middle guard think of him as an interestingly brilliant old man who is great at playing creepy roles (Saruman, Scaramanga... chat room Op).
Also, who but Mr. Lee himself would choose the name of "Sharku"? An "affectionate" nickname for one of his favorite characters. And we all know that if Sharku was involved in filming, Arwen would not have made it to Helm's Deep. Coincidence that she did not? I doubt it.
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peace
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08-04-2005, 08:51 PM
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#5 |
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Cryptic Aura
Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 5,996
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A token Falcon, teasingly
Having reread the Holmes mysteries for clues as to successful detectioning, having watched seasons of CSI in video within the space of one month to ascertain personality quirks, having imitated Lt. Columbo in all features save the smelly cigar and single eye (yes, the raincoat is a handsome disguise), I now offer these pieces of detective skull-duggery worthy of the deepest, darkest barrow.
The secret real name of Feanor of thePeredhil is Anke Katrin Eismann, the delightful and wonderfully talented young artist who is setting a new standard for Tolkien artwork. This was obvious, as our young Fea is full of the same spirited high imagination and creative energy as Eismann and fully capable of original interpretations in her own RPGs as Eismann presents us with. You don't believe me? Check out Anke-Katrin Eismann's galleries . The secret, real name of mark12_30 is none other than that of the generous, intelligent, and all-round spiffy daughter of JRR Tolkien, Priscilla Tolkien herself. With modesty, wit, and constant humility, she perseveres in holding out the hope that we all will understand her father as Our Father of great fantasy. And without farther ado I move on to the next suspect..., er, candidate. On the other hand, narffoc is none other than the person who runs the Dominic Monaghan fansite called domgasm. Only, I say, only someone with the linguistic taste to create that site name could also come up with the Downs nick to represent an half orc. 'Twas under the influence of that orcish brew I'm sure. Both times. The Squatter of Amon Rudh just has to be John Garth, author of the latest Tolkien biography, Tolkien and the Great War. Who else has the detailed knowledge of World War I social and military history and love both of Tolkien and of created languages? He told me himself, he did, at Gordon's, while looking upon a model WWII airplane, that he misspent his youth satisfying his enthusiasm for military things. I hope this is not perceived as betraying a personal confession, for it was made in full view of the bartender and under the loving touch of a glass of ruby port. I hasten to add this was not the name we met under, but I should add that Squatter has given me an academic email addy. One of our recent recruits to the Canonicity thread, Formendacil, bears all the likely traits of being none other than Dominic Monaghan himself! His posts persuade me that he is obviously capable of writing a comedy screenplay such as that Monaghan has written with Billy Boyd. I'm sure he comes here to Barrow Downs to practice his hand at simile and metaphor and learn how to handle the outrageous scorn of Barrow Downers who insist upon the most literal interpretations of his posts. Now this one is particularly secret. No doubt Tolkien fans know of the legendary love and enthusiasm for Tolkien which the scriptwriter Philippa Boyens has. She can even answer journalists' questions in elvish! Yet few know that her passion for writing Tolkien fanfiction extends beyond the films. Yes, she loves to guide gently younger writers into the respectful waters of Tolkien-consistent RPGs. She is none other than our illustrious RPG Moderator--drum roll here please-- piosenniel. When I heard of the story of how Boyens invited both Sean Bean and Viggo Mortgensen to her hotel room on the same night to go over script changes, why, I knew at once our no-nonsense piosenniel would appreciate the irony of that situation. Last but most assuredly not least I submit my final gumshoe report. I have no compromising photographs to prove this, but without a doubt we must all acknowledge the profound similarity between the great love and respect for Tolkien and the profound depth of scholarly work of our own Estelyn Telcontar and that of the great Tolkien scholar, Verlyn Fleiger. Only a scholar of such magnitude could lovingly produce the Entish Bow parodies. And only a scholar of language would be unable to resist the wordplay between the names Estelyn and Verlyn. *picks up violin with a flourish and plays a mad piece*
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I’ll sing his roots off. I’ll sing a wind up and blow leaf and branch away. Last edited by Bęthberry; 08-04-2005 at 09:34 PM. |
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08-04-2005, 09:07 PM
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#6 |
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Messenger of Hope
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: In a tiny, insignificant little town in one of the many States.
Posts: 5,076
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 Are you people serious? *waits with rather quickly beating heart*
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A young man who wishes to remain a sound atheist cannot be too careful of his reading. - C.S. Lewis |
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08-04-2005, 09:44 PM
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#7 |
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Stormdancer of Doom
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Elvish singing is not a thing to miss, in June under the stars
Posts: 4,349
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While cleverly fooling us all with faked photographs (dozens of them on his decoy welbsite), the only real clue as to his true identity is shown in his fiery avatar.
No, no, no, I don't mean Smaug. We're talking Real Life here, smarten up. No, he has successfully pulled the Moria over our eyes, and left us all unsuspecting that H-I's reallio, trulio identity is none other than.... (drums, drums, drums in the deep).... The Balrog of Morgoth. Ooooo, catch me, I'm gonna faint. (thud)
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...down to the water to see the elves dance and sing upon the midsummer's eve. |
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08-05-2005, 01:32 AM
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#8 | |
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Princess of Skwerlz
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: where the Sea is eastwards (WtR: 6060 miles)
Posts: 7,500
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Quote:
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'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...' |
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08-05-2005, 02:04 AM
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#9 | |
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Desultory Dwimmerlaik
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Pickin' flowers with Bill the Cat.....
Posts: 7,779
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Quote:
Yes, well, that is, of course utter nonsense . . . The real irony being that jarring juxtaposition of Sean and Viggo with 'no-nonsense' . . .  Jack! Jack! Now where did I put that Kong script? And who's gone off with my red edit pencil? ~*~ Pio
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08-05-2005, 03:48 AM
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#10 |
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Pile O'Bones
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 14
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I knew I could not hush it up forever...
Alas, I knew I would be unmasked in the end... *sigh*
Ah, lemme make as much good outta my exposure as I possiby can... so, signed copies of my authobiography "Fiery Service, Or How Come Balrogs Wear Eyeliner" will be handed out free to ladies fainting in spectacular manner... *sigh* all this publicity... |
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08-05-2005, 08:33 AM
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#11 |
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Stormdancer of Doom
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Elvish singing is not a thing to miss, in June under the stars
Posts: 4,349
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(And now we know that Priscilla Tolkien either has a weakness for flame-proof eyeliner, or, she just likes free books.)
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...down to the water to see the elves dance and sing upon the midsummer's eve. |
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08-05-2005, 11:33 AM
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#12 |
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Messenger of Hope
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: In a tiny, insignificant little town in one of the many States.
Posts: 5,076
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 Well, a chap can never be sure, you know?
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A young man who wishes to remain a sound atheist cannot be too careful of his reading. - C.S. Lewis |
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08-05-2005, 02:57 PM
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#13 |
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Sword of Spirit
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Oh, I'm around.
Posts: 1,401
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Hmm. I think that Nilpaurion Felagund is the alter ego of... Keanu Reeves. Everything he says screams Matrix or Constantine.
I've also noted that The Only Real Estel has not been to worried about revealing that his true identity is... Johnny Depp. His avatar shouted it out for a while, but what really gave it away was his increasingly bizarre captions in CC. One cannot act as Willy Wonka without having some strange side effects! By the way, very good performance in Pirates of the Caribbean.Speaking of PotC, I've had a hunch for some time that... Orlando Bloom has been haunting the Downs. I've seen hints here and there, and have determined that he is none other than Amanaduial the archer. He has even tried to throw us by putting a picture of a women on the Photo page. Beautiful shot, but definitely not the true face behind that user.
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I'm on a Mission from God. |
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08-05-2005, 03:06 PM
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Raffish Rapscallion
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Far from the 'Downs, it seems :-(
Posts: 2,835
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Quote:
"Why, thank you." Oops! On an on topic note, Meela is most likely John Noble doing a bad job of hiding behind overt appreciation for his own character. 
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08-05-2005, 07:55 PM
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#15 |
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Beloved Shadow
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: The Stadium
Posts: 5,971
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I have this gut feeling that Mithalwen is Kate Beckinsale.
This feeling surfaced during the first game of Werewolf here on the Downs. Mith proved to be a dangerous foe to the werewolves during the course of the game. I watched the movies Van Helsing and Underworld for the first time while the game was in progress. As you know, in both of those movies Kate Beckinsale proves to be a dangerous foe to the werewolves. Hmm... interesting. Mith is British. Kate Beckinsale is British. Hmm... very interesting. Despite a difference in age, I find myself strongly attracted to Kate Beckinsale. Mith is rumored to be around the same age as Kate, and I am strongly attracted to Mith as well. Count them up- three coincidences! Two I might understand, but three... ...hmm... I wonder...
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the phantom has posted.
This thread is now important. |
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08-08-2005, 01:12 PM
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#16 |
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Pilgrim Soul
Join Date: May 2004
Location: watching the wonga-wonga birds circle...
Posts: 9,458
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*wipes tears of laughter from eyes*..... Phantom, dear, there is only one thing to say "You might think that, I could not possibly comment.."
http://www.smh.com.au/ffximage/2005/...d__200x348.jpg Cate is closer to the mark.. but not much 
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“But Finrod walks with Finarfin his father beneath the trees in Eldamar.”
Christopher Tolkien, Requiescat in pace Last edited by Mithalwen; 08-08-2005 at 01:18 PM. |
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08-09-2005, 09:17 AM
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#17 |
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Stormdancer of Doom
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Elvish singing is not a thing to miss, in June under the stars
Posts: 4,349
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Several folk I am wondering about.
Mithadan... sneaky fellow, lurking quietly about; we wondersss, preciousss, we wonders. lindil. ? Thenamir. ? Mister Underhill-- the Orli idea doesn't hold water for me. He may or may not look like a wood elf, I don't know; he may have a lilting, pleasing voice, with accent to boot-- I couldn't say. However: Mister Underhill never stutters, or says "Um". I fear he'd hurt himself if he tried.
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...down to the water to see the elves dance and sing upon the midsummer's eve. |
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08-09-2005, 02:27 PM
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#18 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Bag-End, Under-Hill, Hobbiton-across-the Water
Posts: 606
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I don't think Thenamir is anyone but Thenamir. He's just too much a one of a kind to be anything else.
However I have it on not so good authority that Orlando Bloom is none other than our dear Barrow-Wight himself! What better way to hide from fangirls than to disguise oneself as a curmudgeonly moderator of such a well reputed forum as this?
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"I'm your huckleberry....that's just my game." |
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08-10-2005, 09:28 AM
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#19 | |
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Shadow of Starlight
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: dancing among the ledgerlines...
Posts: 2,347
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May I ask exactly what are these 'hints' that gave me away as a the tall, 28-year-old and, oh yes, male actor from London that I blatantly am? Just so I can, y'know, improve my facade for later use...Now the question - what exactly do I have in common with Mr. Underhill and the Barrow-Wight?
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I am what I was, a harmless little devil |
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08-10-2005, 09:34 AM
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#20 |
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La Belle Dame sans Merci
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: perpetual uncertainty
Posts: 5,517
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AMANADUIAL THE ARCHER -> MI TER UNDERH L AAAAACH
Look at all those letters you have in common. Coincidence? I doubt it. I submit that Archer and Underhillo are one and the same!
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peace
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08-10-2005, 12:26 PM
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#21 | ||||
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Sword of Spirit
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Oh, I'm around.
Posts: 1,401
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*gasp*
I think we have a breakthrough on our hands. Allow me to present the case. Earlier I submitted that Amanaduial the archer was Orlando Bloom. Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
So if Amanaduial is Orlando Bloom and The Barrow-Wight is also Orlando Bloom and Amanaduial and Mister Underhill are one and the same then... Amanaduial the archer, Mister Underhill, and The Barrow-Wight are all Orlando Bloom! All you have to do is put 2 and 4 together, and what do you get...? Quote:
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I'm on a Mission from God. |
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08-10-2005, 01:46 PM
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#22 |
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Psyche of Prince Immortal
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Above a Parapet Obvious exits are: North, South, and Dennis
Posts: 4,734
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there have been comments saying that Fordim is Indiana Jones... though i've always wanted to be like Indiana Jones, fighting Nazi's and always getting the girl... also, i myself have been pictured as a young Micheal Palin
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Love doesn't blow up and get killed.
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08-10-2005, 04:40 PM
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#23 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Bag-End, Under-Hill, Hobbiton-across-the Water
Posts: 606
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hmmmm...People say I look like Bryce Dallas Howard (Ivy Walker from The Village) does that count for anything?
I don't think Bethyberry is Madonna, I think she's Miranda Otto.
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"I'm your huckleberry....that's just my game." |
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10-07-2005, 05:38 PM
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#24 | |
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Spectre of Capitalism
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Battling evil bureaucrats at Zeta Aquilae
Posts: 987
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Quote:
Danny DeVito.
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The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane. ~~ Marcus Aurelius |
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10-10-2005, 06:41 AM
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#25 |
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Deadnight Chanter
Join Date: Sep 2000
Posts: 4,244
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You joke, he is
Michael Martinez is a member of BD. Or was, if we count his inactivity as a proof he is not going to reappear
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Egroeg Ihkhsal - Would you believe in the love at first sight? - Yes I'm certain that it happens all the time! |
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10-10-2005, 06:51 AM
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#26 |
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Princess of Skwerlz
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: where the Sea is eastwards (WtR: 6060 miles)
Posts: 7,500
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Of course he wouldn't reappear under his real name, HI!
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'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...' |
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10-11-2005, 09:25 PM
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#27 |
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Shade of Carn Dűm
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Somewhere far, far away. Eh.
Posts: 402
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Oh my... and I thought everyone on here was Bob, Joe, Tom, Jane, Jill, or Joan. Loleth...
(looks around suspiciously) I just know that somewhere on here is the ghost of J.R.R. Tolkien, somehow using mental powers to manipulate a keyboard... But in seriousness, I do indeed wonder if some of the people we jabber at in RPG and such forth aren't really famous people trying to appear as if they were as perfectly (ab) normal as the rest of us. We knooooooow you're there.... |
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04-18-2006, 10:35 AM
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#28 |
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Cryptic Aura
Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 5,996
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Being a gumshoe is a sticky business ...
Funny, once upon a time I suspected HerenIstarion of being Michael Martinez himself. And for a time I kept thinking of Thenamir as Billy Graham. He did call himself an old geezer, after all!
But I've got the real dope on some other folks now. Sharkey, aka Old Man, really is an old man. He's Andrew Sachs, the actor who played the tyrannized dogsbody and waiter Manuel on Fawlty Towers. Meela is Carrie Fisher, who soon will publish her second book, Postcards from the Edge of Denethor's Jump. davem is none other than famous British comedian Ronnie Corbett. After the death of the other Ronnie, he searched around for another partner in laughter and so hooked up with ... Prunella Scales, who is none other than our esteemed Lalwendë, who has found here in Middle-earth Online a parallel outlet for her good works on the Protection of Rural England. Diamond18 may be a voice newly familiar to the newbies here, as she has just returned from a hiatus from REB, but us oldesters knew her from way back as the vegetarian singer k. d. lang. She regularly uses her REB characters Pimpiowen and Vogonwë to excise her formerly indulged desires for meat. I would have bet money that Hookbill is M.C. Escher, until I discovered that Escher was dead and left clear instructions in his will that he was not to be reincarnated in latter day talents. But persevering I have seen the light and now understand that our dear Hookbill the Zoomba is Seth the Cartoonist. And how could I not attempt to uncover the sauve identity of our debonair Boromir88? Boro might blush to admit it, but he is in internet fact Aldo Nova , the Canadian guitarist of Fantasy fame from that now forgotten decade, the 80's. He lives off the avails of profits from selling the rights to Fantasy to Ringtones. Two final secret identities to finish this latest round. Most of us know Kuruharan from his occasional Books posts. However, some of us with more unrefined tastes in Tolkienology know his work on the REB parodies. Yet he can now be uncloaked in his alternate identity as the customer service monkey Mark at ThinkGeek. I'm willing to bet he keeps a pet dragon there to keep the puppy population down. Last but perverbially not least is the most remarkable secret identity of this round of sleuthing. We have all been entertained and regaled by the excellent work of alatar in the Sequence by Sequence threads on the movies. Yet, almost unbelievably, our alatar is William Shatner! He was so stung by the popularity of Nimoy's rendition of Bilbo's song that he determined to enter Middle-earth Online and lay the groundwork for award-winning excellence in the filmic field of acting. I hear he is up for some Enty awards based on his fine S x S posts. Over to you, Esty.
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I’ll sing his roots off. I’ll sing a wind up and blow leaf and branch away. Last edited by Bęthberry; 04-19-2006 at 11:16 AM. Reason: a dropped 'haitch |
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07-01-2006, 01:06 PM
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#29 |
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The Pearl, The Lily Maid
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: In my luxury Barrow, snuggled up in a pile of satin pillows, eating fresh fruit.
Posts: 1,628
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I have made a vital discovery! Our own dear LMP is none other than...
(DunDunDUNNNNNN!!!) Well...see for yourself.
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<=== Lookee, lookee, lots of IM handles! |
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