What do you assign to Mordor?

[Celuien]

Originally Posted by Orominuialwen

I assign native English speakes who misuse apostrophes. I can understand how people who normally speak another language might have trouble, but I'm going to get violent if I see one more person write "I bought some new book's."

The number of times I've seen "it's" and "its" confused in handouts from professors astounds me.

I'm assigning computer programs that won't permit uninstalls. I have one stuck on my PDA that isn't working but I can't take it off because it has assigned itself to a protected file.

[Lhunardawen]

Lalwendë, so spell checkers should go to Mordor?

[Sophia the Thunder Mistress]

Though there's alot of stuff I'd like to get out of Mordor. ~Oddwen

I wonder if there ought to be a "Get out of Mordor Free Card"

Another thing I would like to send to Mordor: red food coloring. Gets everywhere, looks disgusting, tastes funny in quantity.

[Lathriel]

I think purple ketchup can go to mordor. It just looks absolutely disgusting!! How can people eat that...

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Originally Posted by Lathriel

Mary-sues should be send to Mordor.

How about satirical ones like my own dear Merisuwyniel? She's a gorgeous, talented, pure-blooded Elven shieldmaiden with a wonderful personality and a great fashion sense for knowing just what one wears to a Quest. You can't want to send her to Mordor!!

[Lathriel]

I am sorry but I don't like fan fiction very much in general. Go ahead write them, but I won't read them.

On Robin Hobb's website you can read a whole rant about fan fiction and I agree with her.

But I wouldn't send people to Mordor if they write fan fiction although I think Robin Hobb would.

[Bêthberry]

I doubt very much if this Robin Hobb's rant comes close to being applicable to our very own Merisuwyniel or either of our Revenge of the Entish Bow or Reunification of the Entish Bow. Not *all* fanfictions are alike.

One really ought to read them before one casts rants.

[Lathriel]

I didn't mean it as a rant. Apologies if it was taken that way.

What else should be send to Mordor?

Clothes for dogs! With this I mean clothes like the ones Tinkerbell (Paris Hilton's dog) is forced to wear. I feel very sorry for the dog who has to wear such things.

[Lalwendë]

Originally Posted by Lathriel

Clothes for dogs! With this I mean clothes like the ones Tinkerbell (Paris Hilton's dog) is forced to wear. I feel very sorry for the dog who has to wear such things.

Paris Hilton herself ought to be sent to Mordor. With a bit of luck the heat would melt her.

And anyone who names their kids after their hotels should go too. By that logic I might be called something Margate Seaview or Skegness Travelodge.

[VanimaEdhel]

Just to comment briefly on what Lathriel said - while I obviously don't dispute someone's right to create fanfiction, for some reason reading it always makes me uncomfortable. I just can never get as into it as I do to the stories created by the original authors. I realize this is probably hypocritical of me, seeing as I write my own fanfiction. But, since I feel so ill at ease reading the fanfiction of others, I never post mine: it's one of those things I do for myself alone. I'm always willing to share my original fiction, though.

Who would I send to Mordor? Gee, how can I answer that without getting political? That's a tough one.

Okay, I'll go a different route, then. How about we send all closed-minded bigots in general to Mordor. Although, that would make us closed-minded and would probably put us in the same category as those people, lumping them in one category and shipping them off.

I wouldn't mind sending some of the New York Yankees announcers into Mordor. I swear, most of them don't speak English - and it's supposedly their first and only language. My father and I have a joke that if you were to ask them, "What language do you speak?" they'd reply, "None."

"Other than English?"

"No. I speak no language."

Well, this is a phonetic interpretation of what the average call sounds like:
Duh pisch tuh Deter...lu-WING enna miss. Snike tree!

Translation:
The pitch to Jeter...Swing and a miss. Strike three!

And no, that was not exaggerated in any way, shape or form.

[the guy who be short]

People who still complain about languages, when all language has already been sent to Mordor.

[Lhunardawen]

Originally Posted by Lalwendë

Paris Hilton herself ought to be sent to Mordor. With a bit of luck the heat would melt her.

I believe she's already in Mordor...

Originally Posted by lmp (post #21)

Anything having to do with Paris Hilton (including this sentence) .... and her ilk.

[the guy who be short]

The lack of published Quenya makes me rather sore
As it is quite evident that if there were some more
Ambiguous Quenya grammar could be a lot more sure
And so this deficiency goes directly to Mordor.

[Alcarillo]

Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie, and their loathesome reality shows should all go to Mordor, along with teachers who spend the entire school year reiterating what was already taught. That really annoys me.

[mormegil]

It's been many years since I've been in High School but I would assign busy work such as the end of year crossword puzzles or word searches that you had to hand in after working it all day in class. Why? Because the teacher didn't think it important to prepare a lesson. I mean seriously a word search...what do I really learn from that?

[Holbytlass]

ldirmchow ksxndhjwjzto
hsjsfind jndxhhdjsbxhydwords hdhcncn
of hnchddjdbhgdhsjcourse jdjiidhfue

[littlemanpoet]

Originally Posted by The Saucepan Man

With a soft regional accent such as Cornish or Southern Irish, it is in my opinion a beautiful sounding language.

I missed this earlier. So basically what you're saying is that English is a beautiful language when spoken by Celts, but not by the English (or Americans).

[Oddwen]

I hereby assign whatever amount of caffeine my sister consumed to deliberately mispell Michael as "Miocuhaiealy" as revenge for mispelling her name, and causing me to nearly choke on my nacho chips straight to Mordor.
I suspect this is a variation on the British/American spelling wars and is already in Mordor, but ah well.

[The Saucepan Man]

Originally Posted by littlemanpoet

I missed this earlier. So basically what you're saying is that English is a beautiful language when spoken by Celts, but not by the English (or Americans).

Absolutely, being part Celt myself.

Although I speak English the way that it should be spoken - without a hint of an accent.

[littlemanpoet]

I assign Religious Fundamentalist Terrorists to Mordor and worse, if you know what I mean.

[the guy who be short]

I thought there was a non-worded agreement to keep this thread light-hearted and non-political. In any case, I doubt anybody would disagree with you, lmp, though perhaps the generalisation of "All Terrorists" would please people a little better.

[Kath]

I would like to assign overzealous political correctness. Why is it so wrong to ask for a black coffee? It's just a colour!

[the guy who be short]

Since when has it been wrong to ask for a black coffee?

One element of PCness that amuses me is the substitution of "Caucasian" for "white." Caucasian applies not only to Europeans, but also to Arabs and Indians. To Mordor!

[Kath]

Since when has it been wrong to ask for a black coffee?

It isn't. That's the point. It's too much.

[the guy who be short]

I have never yet been confronted for asking for a black coffee.

TGWBS: May I have a black coffee please?
Vendor: Excuse me! Are you insinuating that my coffee is racially inferior to other types?! Get out, foul Dwimmerlaik!

Nope, don't see that ever happening. You must live in a really weird and scary place.

[Feanor of the Peredhil]

Ah, political correctness... *sends it out the window with a swift kick*

In a world where a joke such as:

"Will you get me some eggs?"
"Brown or white?"
"White."
"Ooh, racist, are we?"

is actually too close to the truth for comfort... No, the funny thing is when, in a sentence, there are "whites and African Americans." Either say "Caucasion and African American" or "black and white" (or dark brown, or beige, or whatever other colors you like), but when people mix and match terminology to be "Politically Correct"... Disturbing.

Have I ever said before that sunburns belong in Mordor? 'Cuz they do.

[the guy who be short]

Originally Posted by Fea

No, the funny thing is when, in a sentence, there are "whites and African Americans." Either say "Caucasion and African American" or "black and white" (or dark brown, or beige, or whatever other colors you like), but when people mix and match terminology to be "Politically Correct"... Disturbing.

There you go, using Caucasian for white again.

[Feanor of the Peredhil]

Caucasian applies not only to Europeans, but also to Arabs and Indians. To Mordor!

It also applies to many Americans. I am of European descent, but am not European. You see, the word "caucasion" is a perfect word to be used as a generality for "non-"black" people who don't fit any of the rest of the labels".

[the guy who be short]

Americans. Granted. You're Europeans at heart, though...

You see, the word "caucasion" is a perfect word to be used as a generality for "non-"black" people who don't fit any of the rest of the labels".

False-o. "Caucasian" only applies to Native Europeans (migrated to larger continents or not), Arabs and Indians.
"Negroid" refers to black people from Sub-saharan Africa.
"Mongoloid" refers to the majority of people. Geographically they span from Mid-Asia to East Asia, as well as including Native Americans.
"Aboriginal" refers simply to Aborigines, and also some people from Southern India.

And there you have it. Nice learning experience, eh?

Off-topic posts should go to Mordor.

[Lathriel]

Off-topic posts should go to Mordor.

And with that many Barrowdowners (me included) are forced to spent a month in Mordor in bootcamp! NOOOOOOOO!!!!

[littlemanpoet]

Originally Posted by the guy who be short

I thought there was a non-worded agreement to keep this thread light-hearted and non-political.

Yes, I've noticed that too. I don't mind it, but I don't want it to prohibit that which is worth saying.

Originally Posted by tgwbs

In any case, I doubt anybody would disagree with you, lmp, though perhaps the generalisation of "All Terrorists" would please people a little better.

No, actually, the religious fundamentalist version of terrorist is even more scarey than the simply greedy or power hungry, in that the former actually believe in their own rectitude, and thus they stop at nothing whereas the latter, akin to werewolves, know they're doing something criminal and hedge their bets for the sake of survival and return on "investment".

[Lalwendë]

Originally Posted by SPM

Although I speak English the way that it should be spoken - without a hint of an accent

Oooh, fighting talk! Of course, all ways of speaking English are accents you know. There is no 'correct' way, unless you are talking about Lancastrian English which is of course, an ancient, unsullied dialect rich with tone and meaning.

[Amanaduial the archer]

Boredom, quite simply. Like, the total boredom where you somehow can't even motivate yourself to do...anything. Yet doing nothing is quite surely going to drive you insane. So everything becomes a chore, and you'd somehow just rather sit there browsing nothing on the internet without any real interest rather than do something....productive.

...and yes, I am on my holidays. Verily, boredom is an enemy I am getting to know very well


And also, of course, the official font of Mordor: Comic Sans. Can you imagine arriving at Mordor and seeing the huge, fiery sign cheerfully informing you in those infuriatingly bubbly letters 'Welcome to Mordor!'. *Shudders* Like being licked to death by a puppy...or a siamese cat for that matter....

[Holbytlass]

Portugese-men-of-war
These bad boys scare the heck out of me. I didn't know about them till the 10th grade. My teacher tells me about them and how to identify them then that summer and for years after I would see them at the beach.
They are wicked jelly fish but their bulbous bodies are blue and they float on top of the water to come and get you!!

[the guy who be short]

Stupid names, like "Jellyfish". You'd expect one to look fish-shaped and be made of Jelly.

And also, "Portugese-Men-of-War." You'd expect them to look like men.
Actually, that name could be offensive to the Portugese. And to Men. Henceforth, they should be called "West-Iberian-People-of-War."

Wait... does this all come under language?

*vanishes to Mordor in a puff*

[VanimaEdhel]

Originally Posted by the guy who be short

I have never yet been confronted for asking for a black coffee.

TGWBS: May I have a black coffee please?
Vendor: Excuse me! Are you insinuating that my coffee is racially inferior to other types?! Get out, foul Dwimmerlaik!

Nope, don't see that ever happening. You must live in a really weird and scary place.

You know, if I were called a Dwimmerlaik in the course of an average conversation, I just might faint.

Actually, the problem is that everyone here in the U.S. now wants to be called a Something-American. If you want to generalize, though, you can't get that - well - specific. If we were to call me a politically correct hyphenated name, I would be a Russian-German-Syrian-Austrian-Polish-Swedish-French-Dutch-American. That doesn't exactly just roll off the tongue. I don't mind being called "white" - call me white, I don't mind. If you want to call me "of European and Middle Eastern descent", go for it. I'm really not that picky.

[Amanaduial the archer]

There's PC-ness...and then there's taking it too far. Call me white, call me black, call me bloody rainbow-coloured (I defy you with my English spelling!) - I really don't mind. When people dance around it and get twitchy when the words black or white are mentioned, insistently referring to people as 'dark skinned'...well, it just seems silly. I do believe there needs to be a line - but at this moment, society seems to be so far past that line that the line...the line is a dot.

TGWBS - calm down, everyone is allowed to make their own point and sure, there are lots of things about language that different people may object to or even, dare I say it, like language. *gasps* It's like saying that if one person decreed that men should be sent to Mordor - does this mean that no one else can mention any specific male or male trait that should be sent? (Purely hypothetical situation, of course...)

(although I would love it if I could say the word theater as you Brits do)

Ah, but then there are some brits who delight in saying it differently. See, the word 'theatre' is rather difficult to spell phonetically as Brits would say it (theer-ter maybe?), but my drama teacher always insisted on saying it 'thee-ah-ter'. Argh! It's that way that thespians often have, to put their own melodramatic, theatrical spin on a word that was really perfectly fine how it was. It just lends such a pretentious air to the word...

*Sigh* And now I'm getting heated about a word. Something wrong here...

[littlemanpoet]

Since Aman could not quite bring herself to do it, I will do it for her: pretentious pronunciations are hereby assigned to Mordor. If an rpg ever takes form, I will have a gas and a half over this one.

[Lalwendë]

Originally Posted by lmp

Since Aman could not quite bring herself to do it, I will do it for her: pretentious pronunciations are hereby assigned to Mordor.

I'll second that. And make sure that the following are included: pretentious pronunciations of foreign language words and phrases. I mean those delivered with a particularly heavy, comedic French/Italian/Spanish 'accent' which the speaker so clearly belives is the correct and cultured thing to do. Alas it reminds you of sitcoms like 'Allo 'Allo. Richard Madeley, greasy UK daytime TV presenter is particularly guilty of this one.

[Amanaduial the archer]

Ooh er, an RPG from lmp? I wait with baited breath...

Originally Posted by littlemanpoet

Since Aman could not quite bring herself to do it, I will do it for her: pretentious pronunciations are hereby assigned to Mordor. If an rpg ever takes form, I will have a gas and a half over this one.