What do you assign to Mordor?

[Encaitare]

I would also like to pack off American spelling. Gandalf is Grey and always will be, I'm afraid.

Of course he is! And hence, I am in the habit of using "grey" all the time, now. "Youse guys" across the pond have infiltrated my mind with your spellings, though... and I highly suspect many of the books I read only increase the effect. You've no idea how often I have pluck the letter U out of "color" and swap S's with their rightful Z's... :-D

nuc-uler (eeew!)

One of many reasons I dislike Bush. The dictionary claims "nuclear" can be pronounced either way, but I think it's all a plot to make our president look smarter than he is.

I have yet to have a science teacher that pronounces it properly,

I feel your pain... my astronomy teacher always said it wrong, and we all snickered from the back of the room.

And who asks a 17-year-old to find the mass of the sun...

Just remember it's a mass of incandescent gas, and you'll be fine.

For those who didn't get that... ignore me.

Hmmm... what shall I send to Mordor? Summer reading books, I think. Nassty books that cut into my personal reading time. And standardized tests, as Fea said, for although I seem to be good at them, studying for them cuts into my watching of Monty Python DVDs... like this didn't happen this week.

[Lhunardawen]

Colds viruses - all strains and mutations of them - without a doubt belong to Mordor.

*cough* *sniff* *sniff*

[Orominuialwen]

British TV mini-series of the '70's and '80's (often shown on the PBS show Mystery in the US) that switch back and forth between film and video, depending on if the shot is indoors or out. It really annoys me, and has a way of detracting from otherwise lovely series (such as the Lord Peter Wimsey and Rumpole ones.) I wish they would just pick one medium and stay with it!

[THE Ka]

My friend Autumn. You have to hate, but love someone as assuming as Mordor's landscape.

Tisk, tissssk... Let's see. What else...

Oh! Unpredictable kilns! They are as greedy as Mt. Doom, if one thing about the clay is slightly valuable to you,*BOOM!*

Another has to be Wednesdays... Who likes something that keeps you in a suspense between Tuesday and Thursday?

I can't think of anymore right now. I will get back with more when they attack me again, or I remember...

~ Ka

[Lhunardawen]

Originally Posted by The KA

Another has to be Wednesdays... Who likes something that keeps you in a suspense between Tuesday and Thursday?

Oh, I do! I have no classes on Wednesdays! Yipee!...Oh wait. Math long exams will be scheduled on at most five Wednesdays this term.

[littlemanpoet]

Is anybody up for a new Gondor rpg featuring spoofy characters trapped with all the things we've assigned to Mordor? Lots of descriptions of places like "Nurnia" and what not? The goal being to escape from Mordor by getting "unassigned" by those who have assigned?

Screwy idea, maybe, but thought I'd ask...

[Feanor of the Peredhil]

If we could do it, LMP, I think it would be a blast, not to mention hilarious. The only problem is that I can't play in Gondor. Just think of all those poor smokers trying to quit... all those gigantic fissures in the landscape that are spewing smoke would certainly be getting to them. Or stumbling across a sheaf of papers that turned out to be difficult exams filled out with the words "Who really cares?"...

[mormegil]

I would like to assign the way some people speak. Not the people themselves, I simply want to get rid of they way they say things. Out here in the western part of the US in a lot of rural communities (in cities as well but more prevelant in rural areas) people use double negatives all of the time. It makes me cringe everytime I hear it. Also when they use the wrong combination of words...one of the worst ones is "we was" honestly people say it just like that. "We was driving down from the cabin..."

Again I do not assign the people just the incorrectness of their speech.

[Celuien]

Ah, lmp, what an intriguing idea. I read through the Entish Bow RPGs the other day and was in stitches. But I've never been in an RPG before and can't play in Gondor either.

Mormegil's post has me thinking...

Someone attempts to utter a sentence containing a double negative and mismatched form of "be," but no sound is heard. Instead, a disembodied voice rings out over Gorgoroth, "We was trying to drive down from the cabin, but we didn't have no gas."

[littlemanpoet]

Originally Posted by Celuien

"We was trying to drive down from the cabin, but we didn't have no gas."

I think the correct grammatical construction of that dialect is "ditt'n have no gas." Yes, it's actually "correct" within its dialect - which is generally known in the States as Cumberland, and it's spreading far and wide with the ever increasing popularity of "country music" in this Hyar kuntree. I can't stand the stuff myself, so into Mordor it goes.

Funny, about not being allowed to play in Gondor rpg's, I wasn't allowed to either, but got invited by an rpg'er and nobody, no mod's not nobody, said a peep about it. Kud we mebbe dyoo it hyar in Middle Arth Marth?

My personal pet peev in regard to the English language is the misuse of "myself" as a kind of false modesty, allowing speakers to get away with placing themselves before others in their sentences. For example. "The guarantee I just described applies to myself and Ted here." Maybe it's that they have a hunch that they don't know whether to use 'I' or 'me' and so cop out with this 'myself' baloney. It's a simple rule, really: the above sentence should be rendered "The guarantee I just described applies to Ted and me." Not Ted and I. If you remove the "Ted and" from the sentence (and you know anything about grammar), you know which it ought to be.

So to Mordor with the "myself and".

[Lathriel]

I think country music should be sent to Mordor. I can't stand it and every song seems the same to me.

*Hides behind a chair because there might be some country fans here*

[Encaitare]

Screwy idea, maybe, but thought I'd ask...

I think it sounds awesome... like others, though, I cannot play in Gondor. I'm but a wee Shireling.

Another thing I'd like to send to Mordor are news reports, when they interview someone but only provide a snippet of what they're saying. You can see the interviewee's mouth continuing to move (if they keep him in shot long enough), but the newscaster talks over them. How do you know what the person's saying? How do you know they're not taking a quote out of context?

[Orominuialwen]

The RPG sounds like a great idea, but never having been in one before, I can't play in Gondor either.

Another thing I'd like to send to Mordor are news reports, when they interview someone but only provide a snippet of what they're saying. You can see the interviewee's mouth continuing to move (if they keep him in shot long enough), but the newscaster talks over them. How do you know what the person's saying? How do you know they're not taking a quote out of context?

This bothers me too. It could be quite easily avoided, too. They could use something called "b-roll," which is when you hear the person talking, but see a different image on the screen. It's used all the time to bridge the gaps when part of the person's speech is cut out, or something like that, and it could be quite easily used in this situation.

[littlemanpoet]

I'll ask some mod or other what can be done about an "I Was Assigned to Mordor" rpg (IWAM?).

[Kath]

lmp why don't you shorten the name to Assigned To Mordor - ATM and then we can send those damned machines there as well. Those card-stealing, money-grabbing, continually broken minions of hell!

*Takes deep breath* - Ok better now

[THE Ka]

Originally Posted by Lhunardawen

Oh, I do! I have no classes on Wednesdays! Yipee!...Oh wait. Math long exams will be scheduled on at most five Wednesdays this term.

Well, there you go. And as for math, I only favor geometry. Ah, yes, those wonderfully safe circles...

Sorry, but this 'bugged' me...

Kud we mebbe dyoo it hyar in Middle Arth Marth?

It was really hard to understand... I had to re-read it five times. It is funny how different sub-cultures can develop wonderfully interesting dialects. I admire it. It was a very humorious expression.

As for where I am taking up residence, I have still to grasp the confusing vocabulary of the many coffee houses...

Another thing that can nace off to mordor for good would have to be diamonds. Dreadfully bland things, there is absolutely no 'wow!' effect. Yes, they may sparkle, have the power to corrupt whole countires and world markets, cut glass, but not much else can be said for color. There are some varieties, but that color doesn't pack much of a punch.

Okay, that's about it for now. I'll try to find more soon.

~ Ka

[Encaitare]

Another thing that can nace off to mordor for good would have to be diamonds. Dreadfully bland things, there is absolutely no 'wow!' effect. Yes, they may sparkle, have the power to corrupt whole countires and world markets, cut glass, but not much else can be said for color. There are some varieties, but that color doesn't pack much of a punch.

Cheers, Ka. I'd rather have colorful, sparkly rocks than clear, sparkly rocks. Actually, I'd rather have some new books than any sparkly rocks, but that's beside the point.

[Celuien]

Originally Posted by littlemanpoet

I think the correct grammatical construction of that dialect is "ditt'n have no gas." Yes, it's actually "correct" within its dialect - which is generally known in the States as Cumberland, and it's spreading far and wide with the ever increasing popularity of "country music" in this Hyar kuntree. I can't stand the stuff myself, so into Mordor it goes.

I stand corrected.

Ah reck'n we can put this hyar game inta Middle Arth Marth.

I think I'll assign rap (I can't call it music) to Mordor. Horrid stuff.

[Bêthberry]

Here's an RP forum Mod stepping in with some comments about this hyah projikct ahbut Mordah.

Your questions are all answered (or just about) in the threads with the rules for gaming on the Barrow Downs. "Ecthelion's Tower" in Gondor explains how littlemanpoet can game in Gondor even though he cannot start games there--he was invited by a Gondorian to join her game, with the expectation that she was responsible for keeping his posts up to snuff.

The "Golden Hall" thread in Gondor and "The Redbook of Westmarch" in The Shire explain the other rules governing who can game where and who can start games where.

My understanding is that RPGs are allowed only in the forums devoted to them. They cannot be started elsewhere on the Barrow Downs. I suppose you could always petition Barrow Wight and Mithadan about this, though, at least to clarify. They's da bosses in this hyah place.

I would say I smell a game, but I wouldn't want anyone to take that as a criticism that this is a rank idea.

[Celuien]

Originally Posted by Bêthberry

Here's an RP forum Mod stepping in with some comments about this hyah projikct ahbut Mordah.

Your questions are all answered (or just about) in the threads with the rules for gaming on the Barrow Downs. "Ecthelion's Tower" in Gondor explains how littlemanpoet can game in Gondor even though he cannot start games there--he was invited by a Gondorian to join her game, with the expectation that she was responsible for keeping his posts up to snuff.

The "Golden Hall" thread in Gondor and "The Redbook of Westmarch" in The Shire explain the other rules governing who can game where and who can start games where.

My understanding is that RPGs are allowed only in the forums devoted to them. They cannot be started elsewhere on the Barrow Downs. I suppose you could always petition Barrow Wight and Mithadan about this, though, at least to clarify. They's da bosses in this hyah place.

I would say I smell a game, but I wouldn't want anyone to take that as a criticism that this is a rank idea.

Thank'ee for the clarification.
*Heads off to read rule threads.*

[turgon]

Tax collectors
what more foul beast slipped thru the cracks of mordors shadows then a tax collector?

[Holbytlass]

I assign to Mordor....
road rage unless provoked by the lack of skill of merging smoothly on and off highway ramps and
white chocolate that's just vanilla trying to be chocolate! I will, however, dabble with evil if it's covering Oreo's .

[Lathriel]

Gasp!!! I LOVE white chocolate! People who don't like it should be sent to Mordor. So Holbytlass due to your dislike of white chocolate you are in Mordor but I am in Mordor as well since you think people who do like white chocolate should be send to Mordor.

[Lalwendë]

In contrast to everyone else I am going to send Standard English to Mordor. I don't mean written English, but spoken English, as I love all the differences in pronunciation and accent. I especially love differences in dialect where people use double negatives, dropped aitches and peculiar words. The South Yorkshire term for 'sweets' is 'spice', which fascinates me; how can the opposite word become the common word for something? What I do not like is the spread of Estuary English, as sadly it seems to have wiped out much dialect use in England, thus reducing the colour of our language. And nuclear is pronounced
knee-yooclee-ur around here.

[Holbytlass]

Lathriel, I said white chocolate is to be sent to Mordor not the people who (are not in their right minds ) like it. But since we are both in Mordor, I suppose we can make our stay in Mordor very comfortable with Oreos covered in REAL chocolate and white chocolate respectively! I mean, you DO like oreos, don't you?! *eyeing suspiciously*

Originally Posted by turgon

Tax collectors
what more foul beast slipped thru the cracks of mordors shadows then a tax collector?

Well, now I have to say that a few of the foul beasts must have reformed because of some that I've worked with. Actually, I should say they worked with me! And believe me, they could have sent me away for 1000 years of hard labor rowing a Corsair ship! But instead, they were most patient and helpful in a very exasperating (on both sides) situation.

As for the language contravercy, it reminds me of a routine Gallagher (the watermelon busting comedian) did on words, for example why doesn't foot sound the same as boot .

[Lathriel]

Yes I do like oreos. I will bring a few boxes of them, and you bring a few. Thus our confinement in Mordor should be much more pleasant. Although I hope it will be brief.

[Lhunardawen]

Originally Posted by turgon

Tax collectors
what more foul beast slipped thru the cracks of mordors shadows then a tax collector?

Have you read the New Movie Script in ME Mirth?

Originally Posted by Holbytlass

white chocolate that's just vanilla trying to be chocolate!

Say, that's an interesting theory. I never looked at white chocolate that way before, but it does make sense.

I assign scary profs to Mordor. They add spice (not the South Yorkshire term as Lalwendë defined it, though ) to college life, yes, but I'd like less excitement in life for now. I have enough of that haunting Storyland.

[turgon]

I checked it out Lhunardawen thanks for redirect

[Sophia the Thunder Mistress]

Doomed to Mordor:

Dangling prepositions. Sentences (at the very least in written English, Lal) should never end with any of the following: at, of, to, with, for, under. Or any preposition not previously mentioned.

Dogs which won't housebreak properly. I am not in good-spirits while shoveling poopies off the floor. Poopie wherever you like in Mordor canine friends.

Watered down beverages. There's nothing worse than drinking something that tastes halfway like juice (coffee, tea, milk, beer, etc.) but half like water.

[littlemanpoet]

Originally Posted by Sophia the Thunder Mistress

Doomed to Mordor:

Dangling prepositions. Sentences (at the very least in written English, Lal) should never end with any of the following: at, of, to, with, for, under. Or any preposition not previously mentioned.

Ah, but then there is the anecdote of Sir Winston Churchill, criticized for his improper use of prepositions and other such, to which he said something to the effect of,

You criticize my English? Excuse me, but English is my language, and I will speak it as I please, for you make an imposition up with which I will not put!

[Kath]

up with which I will not put

Forming Geroge Lucas' idea for Master Yoda - who should be put in Mordor for his appalling way of speaking in the last Star Wars film. It was bad enough in the others but is now completely over the top.

[Feanor of the Peredhil]

To Mordor I will send...

People who look at me with a horrified look as they see the habit I've developed of dipping Troops' curly fries into chocolate ice cream. I blame my brother for introducing me to that fantastic taste combination.

And I'll send my own inability to turn down food-dares. "Hey Fea, I dare you to eat cheese doodles and marshmallows at the same time." *thinks* "Eeeew.... okay." (for common knowledge, the combined taste is somewhat like Lucky Charms).

Also heading off to Mordor is this blessed hot weather that makes me not want to eat. Me! Not hungry. And when henna fades so it looks like you're dirty, instead of decorated. Horrible affliction. And spider bites. Nasty things.

[Oddwen]

The improper switching of "your" and "you're". *twitch* Can't handle...must...

I condemn thee to the side of the smokers and to the sheafs of standardized tests, foul grammar error of Sauron!

And a game of sorts might be fun.

Hush, Italex.

Though I've not been sent to Mordor yet, I think...does purposeful misuse of Jamesian English count?
Though there's alot of stuff I'd like to get out of Mordor.

[the guy who be short]

Oddwen, I'm afraid you have been sent to Mordor. I remember somebody assigning humanity in general to the Curséd realm.

Myself, I will now send all language to Mordor, for the divisions it causes amongst the people of the 'Downs. Henceforth, this midget will communicate only in gestures*. *bows and leaves*

*Don't hold me to that, by the way.

[Orominuialwen]

I assign native English speakes who misuse apostrophes. I can understand how people who normally speak another language might have trouble, but I'm going to get violent if I see one more person write "I bought some new book's."

And I'll send my own inability to turn down food-dares. "Hey Fea, I dare you to eat cheese doodles and marshmallows at the same time." *thinks* "Eeeew.... okay." (for common knowledge, the combined taste is somewhat like Lucky Charms).

You should try rice pudding with curry in it. They make a wonderful combination. (No, I am not kidding.)

[Lathriel]

Whenever I tell people I like black licorice they make a weird face and tell me it is really gross. I would really like to send those looks and comments to Mordor

[Oddwen]

Originally Posted by Lathriel

Whenever I tell people I like black licorice they make a weird face and tell me it is really gross. I would really like to send those looks and comments to Mordor

Up, there I go, off to Mordor with the roadhogs...

[mormegil]

Originally Posted by Oddwen

Up, there I go, off to Mordor with the roadhogs...

Well I'm off with you Oddwen, though for the life of me I can't understand why it wasn't the black licorice that was sent off instead of us. If there was ever a snack for orcs that would be it.

[Lathriel]

But black licorice is so good and there are so many different flavours. Shall I describe them?

There is salty black licorice, there is sweet black licorice. There is licorice that tastes like honey...

[Lalwendë]

Churchill as inspiration for Yoda? Fight them on the beaches we will. I can just see him now with his lightsaber cunningly hidden in his walking stick, or maybe it was in the cigar?

Dangling prepositions cause me not bother, but I do have an issue with misused apostrophes which bring out the pedant in me. The one misuse of English I do hate more than any other is when people mistakenly write you instead of your. As in "Bring you coat with you" or "Please refrain from putting you feet up on the table". I blame it on spell checkers!