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11-26-2018, 05:35 PM | #14161 |
Gruesome Spectre
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Heaven's doorstep
Posts: 8,037
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"I assure you Théoden, there are indeed talking trees, and my cousin Radagast has not been having me try his new mushroom hybrids."
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Music alone proves the existence of God. |
12-19-2018, 09:17 AM | #14162 |
Regal Dwarven Shade
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: A Remote Dwarven Hold
Posts: 3,589
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I can't believe somebody didn't say this already
Gandalf: And now for slide #387 of The Greatest Hits of Gandalf Uncloaking!
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...finding a path that cannot be found, walking a road that cannot be seen, climbing a ladder that was never placed, or reading a paragraph that has no... |
04-13-2019, 08:35 PM | #14163 |
Blossom of Dwimordene
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: The realm of forgotten words
Posts: 10,379
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- Gandalf, my country is in ruin. The armies are scattered, the treasuries are emptied, my people do not trust in me anymore. What should I do?
- Hang every nobleman and pain Meduseld blue. - But why blue? - I knew there would be no issues with the first proposal.
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You passed from under darkened dome, you enter now the secret land. - Take me to Finrod's fabled home!... ~ Finrod: The Rock Opera |
09-06-2019, 12:36 AM | #14164 |
Wight
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Tottering about in the Wild
Posts: 130
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Gandalf: "...and that's how I got past the Balrog on the 100th level in Moria. Now, on level 99 we duked it out with rocks..."
Theoden: :If I was still under Saruman's spell, I wouldn't have to listen to this.:
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Not all those who wander are lost . . . because some of us know how to read a map. |
09-20-2019, 07:05 AM | #14165 |
Gruesome Spectre
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Heaven's doorstep
Posts: 8,037
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"See, Théoden, I had this dream once that I wore a silly helmet and could control metal."
"Just a minute, folks. I want to sketch this scene for your tombs....er, for history."
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Music alone proves the existence of God. |
09-20-2019, 06:17 PM | #14166 |
Blossom of Dwimordene
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: The realm of forgotten words
Posts: 10,379
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- Elrond, are Elves supposed to get a growth spurt when they reach a couple thousand years, or were you drinking the Ent-draught again?
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You passed from under darkened dome, you enter now the secret land. - Take me to Finrod's fabled home!... ~ Finrod: The Rock Opera |
11-07-2019, 02:49 AM | #14167 |
Odinic Wanderer
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Don't mention the abomination
Much to the dismay of the Fellowship, and due to unfortunate incidents in the past, Elrond explained in no uncertain terms, that elvish hospitality did not extend to naked frolicking in public fountains.
Last edited by Rune Son of Bjarne; 11-07-2019 at 02:49 AM. Reason: removed an additional "the fellowship" for the text |
12-19-2019, 05:03 PM | #14168 |
Regal Dwarven Shade
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: A Remote Dwarven Hold
Posts: 3,589
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Alright, we know that one of you is the culprit who ate all the cake.
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...finding a path that cannot be found, walking a road that cannot be seen, climbing a ladder that was never placed, or reading a paragraph that has no... |
12-26-2019, 10:51 AM | #14169 |
Drummer in the Deep
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Next Sunday A.D.
Posts: 2,145
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Erestor: We've rounded up the usual suspects Elrond, can you point out which one stole your wallet?
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But all the while I sit and think of times there were before
I listen for returning feet and voices at the door |
01-07-2020, 03:16 PM | #14170 |
Odinic Wanderer
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Is this allowed?
Hugo Weaving was very happy to announce that in order to "corner the market", he had managed to convince New Line and Peter Jackson to film Lord of the Rings as well as a porno parody silmutaniously using the same cast.
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03-23-2020, 02:38 PM | #14171 |
Spectre of Capitalism
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Battling evil bureaucrats at Zeta Aquilae
Posts: 987
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Scene from the new movie, "Honey, I Shrunk The Fellowship"
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The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane. ~~ Marcus Aurelius |
03-25-2020, 09:05 PM | #14172 |
Ghost Prince of Cardolan
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"No one leaves here alive until one of you lot confesses who took Priscilla on a joyride across the Bruinen."
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Vinur, vinur skilur tú meg? Veitst tú ongan loyniveg? Hevur tú reikað líka sum eg, í endaleysu tokuni? |
12-19-2020, 04:22 PM | #14173 |
Regal Dwarven Shade
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: A Remote Dwarven Hold
Posts: 3,589
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Good Morning Class!
Welcome to Hair Weaving 401! This is the capstone course for this major and by the end of the course you are expected to be able to recreate the magificent weave I am currently sporting on the back of my head.
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...finding a path that cannot be found, walking a road that cannot be seen, climbing a ladder that was never placed, or reading a paragraph that has no... |
12-20-2020, 09:05 PM | #14174 |
Laconic Loreman
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Hair Weaving 401 with Hugo!
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Fenris Penguin
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12-21-2020, 02:51 PM | #14175 |
Regal Dwarven Shade
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: A Remote Dwarven Hold
Posts: 3,589
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You figured out my inspiration for the joke!
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...finding a path that cannot be found, walking a road that cannot be seen, climbing a ladder that was never placed, or reading a paragraph that has no... |
04-09-2021, 01:47 AM | #14176 |
Odinic Wanderer
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Elrond started to doubt his own judgment, when he for the thousand time had to scold the Fellowship for turning on all the torches in broad daylight.
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04-09-2021, 05:30 PM | #14177 |
Dead Serious
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Elrond: "You've already had breakfast."
The whole Fellowship, now converted to Hobbit ways: **A STARE, DENOTING THEY HAVE HAD ONE, YES, BUT WHAT ABOUT SECOND BREAKFAST**
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I prefer history, true or feigned.
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04-10-2021, 08:24 PM | #14178 |
Odinic Wanderer
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At roll call Gimli managed to cover-up the absence of the rest of the fellowship, by the strategic placement of cardboard cut-outs and Elrond seemed none the wiser.
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04-10-2021, 09:42 PM | #14179 |
Blossom of Dwimordene
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: The realm of forgotten words
Posts: 10,379
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Did someone say bring the old times back?
Yes, Elrond, we are staging a protest to demand the right for second breakfast. And if you refuse to comply, we will start operating under a new slogan: "Gondor needs no pants".
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You passed from under darkened dome, you enter now the secret land. - Take me to Finrod's fabled home!... ~ Finrod: The Rock Opera |
04-11-2021, 03:14 PM | #14180 |
Odinic Wanderer
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"Listen guys you have been loitering here since 2019, don't you have a mountain to catch?"
Gandalf was tempted by the Ring, but in the end his germaphobia ensured that he would never claim it for his own. |
04-11-2021, 04:40 PM | #14181 |
Gruesome Spectre
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Heaven's doorstep
Posts: 8,037
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"Heavens Frodo, that is a nasty hangnail!"
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Music alone proves the existence of God. |
04-11-2021, 04:44 PM | #14182 |
Dead Serious
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Even with Frodo holding the One Ring out immediately before him, Gandalf still couldn't take his eyes off the hobbit's prodigious feet.
Frodo: "Hey! Gandalf! My eyes are up here!"
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I prefer history, true or feigned.
Last edited by Formendacil; 04-12-2021 at 04:33 PM. Reason: Spelling |
04-14-2021, 01:34 AM | #14183 |
A Voice That Gainsayeth
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: In that far land beyond the Sea
Posts: 7,431
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The hypnosis content was heading towards a stalemate after one and half hours of Frodo just repeating "you are sleepy... so very sleeepy..." and Gandalf repeating "follow my fingers' movement..."
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"Should the story say 'he ate bread,' the dramatic producer can only show 'a piece of bread' according to his taste or fancy, but the hearer of the story will think of bread in general and picture it in some form of his own." -On Fairy-Stories |
07-04-2021, 11:38 AM | #14184 |
Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Muddy-earth
Posts: 1,297
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Ah, cheese Hula Hoops, my favourite said Gandalf
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[B]THE LORD OF THE GRINS:THE ONE PARODY....A PARODY BETTER THAN THE RINGS OF POWER. |
12-19-2021, 08:33 AM | #14185 |
Regal Dwarven Shade
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: A Remote Dwarven Hold
Posts: 3,589
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Is THIS your ring..?
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...finding a path that cannot be found, walking a road that cannot be seen, climbing a ladder that was never placed, or reading a paragraph that has no... |
12-19-2021, 08:45 PM | #14186 |
Blossom of Dwimordene
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: The realm of forgotten words
Posts: 10,379
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After a few pints at the Green Dragon, Gandalf was rather struggling to get his finger to the intended target.
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You passed from under darkened dome, you enter now the secret land. - Take me to Finrod's fabled home!... ~ Finrod: The Rock Opera |
01-22-2022, 06:47 PM | #14187 |
Odinic Wanderer
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Frodo quickly realised that the Magic of Gandalf mainly consisted of making items "float" in mid air with the cunning use of very thin string.
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01-26-2022, 11:14 PM | #14188 |
Drummer in the Deep
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Next Sunday A.D.
Posts: 2,145
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"Good heavens, no, no, no!" cried Gandalf. "That's the little piggy that went 'wee wee wee' all the way home, THAT little piggy went to market!"
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But all the while I sit and think of times there were before
I listen for returning feet and voices at the door |
09-25-2022, 01:56 AM | #14189 |
Psyche of Prince Immortal
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Gandalf always considered himself "hip with the kids" and was tempted to try the latest craze since West Farthing Leaf.
Frodo didn't know where this old magic man came from.
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Love doesn't blow up and get killed.
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12-19-2022, 10:52 AM | #14190 |
Regal Dwarven Shade
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: A Remote Dwarven Hold
Posts: 3,589
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Frodo: Come on, Gandalf, shake my hand!
*bzzt* Gandalf: Ouch! Frodo: Gotcha! I can't believe you fell for that!
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...finding a path that cannot be found, walking a road that cannot be seen, climbing a ladder that was never placed, or reading a paragraph that has no... |
02-04-2023, 06:49 AM | #14191 |
Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: The Deepest Forges of Ered Luin
Posts: 733
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Doesn't really need a caption, but a friend sent me this and I thought you might enjoy.
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Even as fog continues to lie in the valleys, so does ancient sin cling to the low places, the depression in the world consciousness. |
12-19-2023, 08:26 AM | #14192 |
Regal Dwarven Shade
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: A Remote Dwarven Hold
Posts: 3,589
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Old Woman: I don't want to eat it and you can't make me!
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...finding a path that cannot be found, walking a road that cannot be seen, climbing a ladder that was never placed, or reading a paragraph that has no... |
01-25-2024, 01:42 PM | #14193 |
Drummer in the Deep
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Next Sunday A.D.
Posts: 2,145
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I sit beside the fire and think of all that I have cooked,
Of veggies, herbs, meats and broth that oh so fresh had looked Or at least were not much spoiled in autumns that there were, I could not sit for long downwind, so don't mind all the hair. I sit beside the fire and think of how this meal will be, For any who can stomach it, forsooth! twill not be me! For still there are so many things that I have never eaten In every pot on every fire there is a different green I sit beside the fire and think of lunches long ago, And people who will have a snack that I shall never know. While all the while I sit and stew at what I've stewed before, I listen for retreating feet and noises from thrown bowls
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But all the while I sit and think of times there were before
I listen for returning feet and voices at the door |
01-27-2024, 02:55 PM | #14194 | |
Odinic Wanderer
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Quote:
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