Crazy Captions - Page 323 - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

Eomer of the Rohirrim · 04-25-2008, 03:46 AM

It's scary, sitting on a horse, but as long as you have someone to hold your hand nothing bad should happen.

Legate of Amon Lanc · 04-25-2008, 04:17 AM

Guard: "Of course, Mr. Gandalf, Lord Sauron the Great awaits you..."

OR

Gandalf: "Here's for the parking ticket, and please take my starship (in the background) to the dock..."

Rune Son of Bjarne · 04-25-2008, 04:37 AM

Gandalf arrives at Minas Tirith in order to convince Boromir who had named him self "The Great Dragon Slayer" to join the quest for Erebor, unfortunately Boromir later claimed that the title had always been "The Great Dragoon Slayer"

Hookbill the Goomba · 04-25-2008, 04:42 AM

Gandalf: No, no, no! You're holding your spear all wrong! Try and make it straighter like Harry over there.

Guard2: Erm, my name's Bob.

Gandalf: Shut up, Harry!

Legate of Amon Lanc · 04-25-2008, 06:24 AM

Guard: "Please, sir, wash your hands here before entering the city."

Oddwen · 04-25-2008, 08:14 AM

"Not a word, now," said Gandalf slipping the man some green.
"Not a word," winked Ingold.

Rune Son of Bjarne · 04-25-2008, 08:23 AM

Gandalf: I am telling you it is not a real arm. . . try to feel it.

Eönwë · 04-25-2008, 09:37 AM

Gandalf: This is how real men make an entrance... Wait... I'm not a man. Here, take my ring.

Hookbill the Goomba · 04-25-2008, 09:40 AM

Shadowfax: Yeah, just put it in the cupboard until I get back would you?

Rune Son of Bjarne · 04-25-2008, 04:22 PM

The guard stares in disbelief, as Gandalf after loosing faith in the fellowship desides to hand him the one ring in a rather uncerimonial fashion.

or

The guards cannot belive their luck as Gandalf decides to hand them over the keys to Shadowfax

Gandalf: Park it for me boys

or

The guard had no idea that the sweets Gandalf just gave him would soon tast of garlic and decaying matter.

Nogrod · 04-25-2008, 04:39 PM

Guard 1: "Charity for an ex-leper sir?"

Gandalf: "Even if I'm in a hurry to save the world... here, take care of yourself lad."

Guard 2: "OMG, I can't believe He is buying it!"

Valesse · 04-25-2008, 07:30 PM

Gandalf: Alright, now we bring our hands back, snap, then grab one another's thumbs... yeah, just like that.
Guard: Swell! So I'm part of the Fellowship now?
Gandalf: Sure, but you have to pay for your tee-shirt.

Oddwen · 04-25-2008, 09:46 PM

A ling'ring touch, a longing glance,
A flower'd memory of that dance...

Hookbill the Goomba · 04-26-2008, 01:26 AM

Gandlaf prepares to pull the leaver that will open the trap door beneath Denethor...

Denethor: There is no victory! We will all burn! Just you watch! I will not stay Heeeeeeeeerrrrrrrreeeeee! Gandalf I hate yoooouuu!!!

Rune Son of Bjarne · 04-26-2008, 03:21 AM

After a bizarre case of mistaken identities, Gandalf has to return teeth to disapointed Gondorians.

Holbytlass · 04-26-2008, 04:34 AM

guard thinks: Grreatt!! He brings in that thing again, now I'm on dooty-duty!

Gwathagor · 04-26-2008, 09:31 PM

Gwathagor · 04-26-2008, 09:33 PM

Arwen and Legolas, simultaneously: What lotion do YOU use?

Rune Son of Bjarne · 04-27-2008, 03:16 AM

Elves really should know better than to play with super-glue

Hookbill the Goomba · 04-27-2008, 03:44 AM

The Elves haddn' t quite got the hang of this 'high-five' thing.

Kitanna · 04-27-2008, 08:49 AM

Arwen checks Legolas for wrinkles.

Oddwen · 04-27-2008, 08:56 AM

Figur: Hmmmm-mmmm, is this something Aragorn won't like? I can...make sure...he won't find out...for a price...

Formendacil · 04-27-2008, 01:29 PM

Arwen: "Just a second, Legolas, my telepathaphone keeps losing reception."

Hookbill the Goomba · 04-27-2008, 01:36 PM

Arwen and Legolas, simultaneously: *SLAP*

OR

Arwen and Legolas, simultaneously: Your ears are weird!

Gwathagor · 04-27-2008, 04:44 PM

Guy-In-Background thinks: "Oooh what's that on my shoes? Huh, nothing, just light. Look, the light's on the floor, too! Fascinating. La de da. I am absorbed in the quality of light upon the floor. Hmm hm hm. These trees are clearly artificial." *whistles a few casual notes* "I sure hope Aragorn doesn't walk by right now... *looks up* "Oh come on, you guys! STILL! This is getting really awkward for me!"

THE Ka · 04-28-2008, 08:47 PM

Little Known Elven Fact: When greeting a fellow dignitary, it is customary for notible figures to approach one another and shake each others' ears. This acts as an efficient VIP badge...

Arwen: Ah ha! You're Legolas, Prince of Greenwood, no?

Legolas: Sorry, I've got nothing on this ear of yours... Who are you again?

Or...

Arwen & Legolas: How do you dooo-? *yoink*

Or...

Arwen & Legolas: Where did you have you're ears done?!

~ Or... Ka

Oddwen · 04-28-2008, 08:55 PM

Figur: What manly hands...

Valesse · 05-04-2008, 09:30 AM

Arwen, Figwit, and Legolas say their tearful farewells as Legolas is slowly devoured by Elrond's hair.

Eönwë · 05-04-2008, 03:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Valesse

Arwen, Figwit, and Legolas say their tearful farewells as Legolas is slowly devoured by Elrond's hair.

Elrond: My manly hair will eat you all!

Morthoron · 05-04-2008, 04:00 PM

Arwen: What foundation do you use? Your skin is so smooth.

Legolas: Oh, it's from my dermatologist, Gandalf...it's hypo-allergenic. The UV rays outside of Mirkwood wreak havoc on my Sindarin skin. You should try some, Arwen, your skin's a little rough.

THE Ka · 05-05-2008, 11:12 PM

Elrond:
He'll eat nutritious lembas and swallow raw nightengale eggs.
Try to build up his shoulders, his chest, ears, and legs.
Such an effort if he only knew of my plan.
In just seven days, I can make you a man...

Arwen: Look deep into my eyes Legolas... You... Will... Believe in Elrond the Magnificent's... Manly Hair treatments...

Figwit: I... Do... Believe!

Arwen: Foiled again!

Legolas: I can't help it babe, its the way my hair's supernatural ultra-sheen works. None shall resist and Elrond shall despair with horrible hair. *flips hair and puts on sunglasses*

~ Ka

Hookbill the Goomba · 05-19-2008, 02:58 AM

Let's get this train wreck back on the road... Yes...

Bilbo very quickly regretted trying to smoke The Barrow Wight.

OR

The spirit of the Giant Ear finally left Bilbo's body!

Kitanna · 05-19-2008, 05:40 AM

Bilbo's attempt to blow a bubble with his gum is a complete failure.

Estelyn Telcontar · 05-19-2008, 06:18 AM

Gandalf first practiced his exorcizing technique on Bilbo before he went on to Théoden.

Morthoron · 05-19-2008, 07:13 AM

Unlike comic strip heroes with decades of practice, poor animated Bilbo was unable to keep his dialogue balloon aloft.

Oddwen · 05-19-2008, 08:16 AM

Bilbo: Ugh! It's sticky! What is it??

Gollum: Youuuu'll find out...

Hookbill the Goomba · 05-19-2008, 08:26 AM

The reason Bilbo was a bachelor: bad breath.

OR

Gandalf always did wonder what happened to his more magical hat... Bilbo ate it.

Eönwë · 05-22-2008, 02:03 PM

Bilbo: I knew blowing bubbles without a hoop was a bad idea-maybe I'll use a ring next time!

kementari · 05-22-2008, 05:21 PM

Bilbo blowing out the cobwebs.

Gwathagor · 05-22-2008, 08:16 PM

Bilbo: Yuck. Mushrooms will do that to you.

04-25-2008, 03:46 AM	#12881
Eomer of the Rohirrim Auspicious Wraith Join Date: May 2002 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 4,859	It's scary, sitting on a horse, but as long as you have someone to hold your hand nothing bad should happen. __________________ Los Ingobernables de Harlond

04-25-2008, 04:17 AM	#12882
Legate of Amon Lanc A Voice That Gainsayeth Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: In that far land beyond the Sea Posts: 7,431	Guard: "Of course, Mr. Gandalf, Lord Sauron the Great awaits you..." OR Gandalf: "Here's for the parking ticket, and please take my starship (in the background) to the dock..." __________________ "Should the story say 'he ate bread,' the dramatic producer can only show 'a piece of bread' according to his taste or fancy, but the hearer of the story will think of bread in general and picture it in some form of his own." -On Fairy-Stories

04-25-2008, 04:42 AM	#12884
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	Gandalf: No, no, no! You're holding your spear all wrong! Try and make it straighter like Harry over there. Guard2: Erm, my name's Bob. Gandalf: Shut up, Harry! __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

04-25-2008, 06:24 AM	#12885
Legate of Amon Lanc A Voice That Gainsayeth Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: In that far land beyond the Sea Posts: 7,431	Guard: "Please, sir, wash your hands here before entering the city." __________________ "Should the story say 'he ate bread,' the dramatic producer can only show 'a piece of bread' according to his taste or fancy, but the hearer of the story will think of bread in general and picture it in some form of his own." -On Fairy-Stories

04-25-2008, 08:14 AM	#12886
Oddwen Drummer in the Deep Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Next Sunday A.D. Posts: 2,145	"Not a word, now," said Gandalf slipping the man some green. "Not a word," winked Ingold. __________________ But all the while I sit and think of times there were before I listen for returning feet and voices at the door

04-25-2008, 09:37 AM	#12888
Eönwë Flame Imperishable Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Right here Posts: 3,928	Gandalf: This is how real men make an entrance... Wait... I'm not a man. Here, take my ring. __________________ Welcome to the Barrow Do-owns Forum / Such a lovely place

04-25-2008, 09:40 AM	#12889
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	Shadowfax: Yeah, just put it in the cupboard until I get back would you? __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

04-25-2008, 04:39 PM	#12891
Nogrod Flame of the Ainulindalë Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Wearing rat's coat, crowskin, crossed staves in a field behaving as the wind behaves Posts: 9,308	Guard 1: "Charity for an ex-leper sir?" Gandalf: "Even if I'm in a hurry to save the world... here, take care of yourself lad." Guard 2: "OMG, I can't believe He is buying it!" __________________ Upon the hearth the fire is red Beneath the roof there is a bed; But not yet weary are our feet...

04-25-2008, 07:30 PM	#12892
Valesse Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: \|Away Posts: 614	Gandalf: Alright, now we bring our hands back, snap, then grab one another's thumbs... yeah, just like that. Guard: Swell! So I'm part of the Fellowship now? Gandalf: Sure, but you have to pay for your tee-shirt. __________________ "Loo, what sholde a man in thyse dayes now wryte, 'egges' or 'eyren'?" - Caxton, Eneydos

04-25-2008, 09:46 PM	#12893
Oddwen Drummer in the Deep Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Next Sunday A.D. Posts: 2,145	A ling'ring touch, a longing glance, A flower'd memory of that dance... __________________ But all the while I sit and think of times there were before I listen for returning feet and voices at the door

04-26-2008, 01:26 AM	#12894
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	Gandlaf prepares to pull the leaver that will open the trap door beneath Denethor... Denethor: There is no victory! We will all burn! Just you watch! I will not stay Heeeeeeeeerrrrrrrreeeeee! Gandalf I hate yoooouuu!!! __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

04-26-2008, 04:34 AM	#12896
Holbytlass Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: May 2003 Location: The Party Tree Posts: 1,042	guard thinks: Grreatt!! He brings in that thing again, now I'm on dooty-duty! __________________ Holby is an actual flesh-and-blood person, right? Not, say a sock-puppet of Nilp’s, by any chance? ~Nerwen, WWCIII

04-26-2008, 09:31 PM	#12897
Gwathagor Shade with a Blade Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: A Rainy Night In Soho Posts: 2,512	__________________ Stories and songs.

04-26-2008, 09:33 PM	#12898
Gwathagor Shade with a Blade Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: A Rainy Night In Soho Posts: 2,512	Arwen and Legolas, simultaneously: What lotion do YOU use? __________________ Stories and songs.

04-27-2008, 03:44 AM	#12900
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	The Elves haddn' t quite got the hang of this 'high-five' thing. __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

04-27-2008, 08:49 AM	#12901
Kitanna Child of the West Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Watching President Fillmore ride a unicorn Posts: 2,132	Arwen checks Legolas for wrinkles. __________________ "Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry." - Mark Twain

04-27-2008, 08:56 AM	#12902
Oddwen Drummer in the Deep Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Next Sunday A.D. Posts: 2,145	Frodo is great...ugh! Repulsive! Figur: Hmmmm-mmmm, is this something Aragorn won't like? I can...make sure...he won't find out...for a price... __________________ But all the while I sit and think of times there were before I listen for returning feet and voices at the door

04-27-2008, 01:29 PM	#12903
Formendacil Dead Serious Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Perched on Thangorodrim's towers. Posts: 3,326	Arwen: "Just a second, Legolas, my telepathaphone keeps losing reception." __________________ I prefer history, true or feigned.

04-27-2008, 01:36 PM	#12904
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	Arwen and Legolas, simultaneously: SLAP OR Arwen and Legolas, simultaneously: Your ears are weird! __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

04-27-2008, 04:44 PM	#12905
Gwathagor Shade with a Blade Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: A Rainy Night In Soho Posts: 2,512	Guy-In-Background thinks: "Oooh what's that on my shoes? Huh, nothing, just light. Look, the light's on the floor, too! Fascinating. La de da. I am absorbed in the quality of light upon the floor. Hmm hm hm. These trees are clearly artificial." whistles a few casual notes "I sure hope Aragorn doesn't walk by right now... looks up "Oh come on, you guys! STILL! This is getting really awkward for me!" __________________ Stories and songs.

04-28-2008, 08:47 PM	#12906
THE Ka Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: As with the flygja Posts: 1,403	Little Known Elven Fact: When greeting a fellow dignitary, it is customary for notible figures to approach one another and shake each others' ears. This acts as an efficient VIP badge... Arwen: Ah ha! You're Legolas, Prince of Greenwood, no? Legolas: Sorry, I've got nothing on this ear of yours... Who are you again? Or... Arwen & Legolas: How do you dooo-? yoink Or... Arwen & Legolas: Where did you have you're ears done?! ~ Or... Ka __________________ Vinur, vinur skilur tú meg? Veitst tú ongan loyniveg? Hevur tú reikað líka sum eg, í endaleysu tokuni?

04-28-2008, 08:55 PM	#12907
Oddwen Drummer in the Deep Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Next Sunday A.D. Posts: 2,145	Figur: What manly hands... __________________ But all the while I sit and think of times there were before I listen for returning feet and voices at the door

05-04-2008, 09:30 AM	#12908
Valesse Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: \|Away Posts: 614	Arwen, Figwit, and Legolas say their tearful farewells as Legolas is slowly devoured by Elrond's hair. __________________ "Loo, what sholde a man in thyse dayes now wryte, 'egges' or 'eyren'?" - Caxton, Eneydos

05-04-2008, 04:00 PM	#12910
Morthoron Curmudgeonly Wordwraith Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Ensconced in curmudgeonly pursuits Posts: 2,509	Arwen: What foundation do you use? Your skin is so smooth. Legolas: Oh, it's from my dermatologist, Gandalf...it's hypo-allergenic. The UV rays outside of Mirkwood wreak havoc on my Sindarin skin. You should try some, Arwen, your skin's a little rough. __________________ And your little sister's immaculate virginity wings away on the bony shoulders of a young horse named George who stole surreptitiously into her geography revision. Last edited by Morthoron; 05-04-2008 at 05:08 PM.

05-05-2008, 11:12 PM	#12911
THE Ka Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: As with the flygja Posts: 1,403	Elrond: He'll eat nutritious lembas and swallow raw nightengale eggs. Try to build up his shoulders, his chest, ears, and legs. Such an effort if he only knew of my plan. In just seven days, I can make you a man... Arwen: Look deep into my eyes Legolas... You... Will... Believe in Elrond the Magnificent's... Manly Hair treatments... Figwit: I... Do... Believe! Arwen: Foiled again! Legolas: I can't help it babe, its the way my hair's supernatural ultra-sheen works. None shall resist and Elrond shall despair with horrible hair. flips hair and puts on sunglasses ~ Ka __________________ Vinur, vinur skilur tú meg? Veitst tú ongan loyniveg? Hevur tú reikað líka sum eg, í endaleysu tokuni? Last edited by THE Ka; 05-05-2008 at 11:17 PM.

05-19-2008, 02:58 AM	#12912
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	New picture times... Let's get this train wreck back on the road... Yes... Bilbo very quickly regretted trying to smoke The Barrow Wight. OR The spirit of the Giant Ear finally left Bilbo's body! __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

05-19-2008, 05:40 AM	#12913
Kitanna Child of the West Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Watching President Fillmore ride a unicorn Posts: 2,132	Bilbo's attempt to blow a bubble with his gum is a complete failure. __________________ "Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry." - Mark Twain

05-19-2008, 06:18 AM	#12914
Estelyn Telcontar Princess of Skwerlz Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: where the Sea is eastwards (WtR: 6060 miles) Posts: 7,500	Gandalf first practiced his exorcizing technique on Bilbo before he went on to Théoden. __________________ 'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...'

05-19-2008, 07:13 AM	#12915
Morthoron Curmudgeonly Wordwraith Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Ensconced in curmudgeonly pursuits Posts: 2,509	Unlike comic strip heroes with decades of practice, poor animated Bilbo was unable to keep his dialogue balloon aloft. __________________ And your little sister's immaculate virginity wings away on the bony shoulders of a young horse named George who stole surreptitiously into her geography revision.

05-19-2008, 08:16 AM	#12916
Oddwen Drummer in the Deep Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Next Sunday A.D. Posts: 2,145	Bilbo: Ugh! It's sticky! What is it?? Gollum: Youuuu'll find out... __________________ But all the while I sit and think of times there were before I listen for returning feet and voices at the door

05-19-2008, 08:26 AM	#12917
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	The reason Bilbo was a bachelor: bad breath. OR Gandalf always did wonder what happened to his more magical hat... Bilbo ate it. __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

05-22-2008, 02:03 PM	#12918
Eönwë Flame Imperishable Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Right here Posts: 3,928	Bilbo: I knew blowing bubbles without a hoop was a bad idea-maybe I'll use a ring next time! __________________ Welcome to the Barrow Do-owns Forum / Such a lovely place

05-22-2008, 05:21 PM	#12919
kementari Haunting Spirit Join Date: May 2003 Location: Amongst the Ferns: New Zealand Posts: 56	Bilbo blowing out the cobwebs. __________________ ~ Kementari ~ Elen síla lúmenn' omentielvo.

05-22-2008, 08:16 PM	#12920
Gwathagor Shade with a Blade Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: A Rainy Night In Soho Posts: 2,512	Bilbo: Yuck. Mushrooms will do that to you. __________________ Stories and songs.