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03-27-2007, 10:54 PM | #4721 |
Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: I don't know. Eastern ME doesn't have maps.
Posts: 527
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Unfortunately, when Aule heard of Sauron's humiliating loss to Huan, he spent the whole night binge-drinking, asking himself "Where did I go wrong in rasing that boy?", and the liquor made him horribly ill, causing him to be rushed to the hospital.
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"And forth went Morgoth, and he was halted by the elves. Then went Sauron, who was stopped by a dog and then aged men. Finally, there came the Witch-King, who destroyed Arnor, but nobody seems to remember that." -A History of Villains |
03-28-2007, 11:10 AM | #4722 |
Ghost Prince of Cardolan
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Fortunately the ER attendant was an (intelligent) relative
of Ioreth and cured Sauron with Athelas.
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The poster formerly known as Tuor of Gondolin. Walking To Rivendell and beyond 12,555 miles passed Nt./Day 5: Pass the beacon on Nardol, the 'Fire Hill.' |
03-28-2007, 10:02 PM | #4723 |
Wight
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Unfortunately, this did not help aule
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God created night, but man created darkness.... |
03-29-2007, 05:19 AM | #4724 |
Wight
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Dancing on this earth for a short while
Posts: 111
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Fortunately, Sauron was found to be allergic to athelas and later died of hives.
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I am against nature. I don't dig nature at all. I think nature is very unnatural. I think the truly natural things are dreams, which nature can't touch with decay. - Bob Dylan |
03-29-2007, 09:11 AM | #4725 |
Laconic Loreman
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Unfortunately since the Ring was still around Sauron instantaneously made a new body for himself.
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Fenris Penguin
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03-29-2007, 09:25 AM | #4726 |
Wight
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Dancing on this earth for a short while
Posts: 111
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Fortunately, the new body that Sauron made for himself was that of a fuzzy pink walrus beanbag, which was, of course, incapable of doing anything but be cuddly and cute.
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I am against nature. I don't dig nature at all. I think nature is very unnatural. I think the truly natural things are dreams, which nature can't touch with decay. - Bob Dylan |
03-29-2007, 10:08 AM | #4727 |
Silver in My Silent Heart
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Unfortunaly, that, like we all know, is enough. The Pink Walrus cult started worshipping Sauron and he made an army out of them.
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03-29-2007, 10:19 AM | #4728 |
Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: The bottom of the ocean, discussing philosophy with a giant squid
Posts: 2,254
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Fortunately, Mount Zoom ran over them all.
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I ♣ baby seals. |
03-29-2007, 10:47 AM | #4729 |
Laconic Loreman
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Unfortunately that didn't kill them and the cult grew even larger
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Fenris Penguin
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03-29-2007, 11:01 AM | #4730 |
Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Fortunately, they all decided to be peace loving elf friends.
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
03-29-2007, 11:08 AM | #4731 |
Laconic Loreman
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Unfortunately the super-evil cults of Alatar and Pallando came and devoured the cult of peace loving elf friends.
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Fenris Penguin
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03-29-2007, 02:21 PM | #4732 |
Guard of the Citadel
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxon
Posts: 2,205
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Fortunately, Alatar and Pallando were offering free burgers to everyone who joined them
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“The invisible and the non-existent look very much alike.”
Delos B. McKown |
03-29-2007, 02:27 PM | #4733 |
Pittodrie Poltergeist
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: trying to find that warm and winding lane again
Posts: 633
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Unfortunately, they were cursed (that's bad for any Homer Simpson doppelgangers out there man that was a classic episode )
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As Beren looked into her eyes within the shadows of her hair, The trembling starlight of the skies he saw there mirrored shimmering. |
03-29-2007, 02:45 PM | #4734 |
Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: The bottom of the ocean, discussing philosophy with a giant squid
Posts: 2,254
|
Fortunately, Sauron ate one of the cursed burgers.
__________________
I ♣ baby seals. |
03-29-2007, 03:13 PM | #4735 |
Guard of the Citadel
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxon
Posts: 2,205
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Unfortunately Ainur are immune to that stuff.
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“The invisible and the non-existent look very much alike.”
Delos B. McKown |
03-29-2007, 04:41 PM | #4736 |
Psyche of Prince Immortal
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Fortunately, he wasn't immune to the cursed pickles in that cursed burger
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Love doesn't blow up and get killed.
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03-30-2007, 04:41 AM | #4737 |
Wight
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Unfortunately, sauron didnt like pickles and he put them to the side
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God created night, but man created darkness.... |
03-30-2007, 05:36 AM | #4738 |
Wight
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Dancing on this earth for a short while
Posts: 111
|
Fortunately he ate the burger anyway, without the pickles, which caused him to explode because he was already full of beans and there was no room left for a burger.
__________________
I am against nature. I don't dig nature at all. I think nature is very unnatural. I think the truly natural things are dreams, which nature can't touch with decay. - Bob Dylan |
03-30-2007, 06:16 AM | #4739 |
Guard of the Citadel
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxon
Posts: 2,205
|
Unfortunately, the Ring had not yet been destroyed, so Sauron reappeared soon
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“The invisible and the non-existent look very much alike.”
Delos B. McKown |
03-30-2007, 06:33 AM | #4740 |
Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
|
Fortunately, The Nazgul had taken the ring out to play with on their lunch break and lost it.
__________________
I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
03-30-2007, 06:42 AM | #4741 |
Guard of the Citadel
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxon
Posts: 2,205
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Unfortunately nobody found it, so Sauron didn't have any problem.
__________________
“The invisible and the non-existent look very much alike.”
Delos B. McKown |
03-30-2007, 07:17 AM | #4742 |
Psyche of Prince Immortal
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Fortunately, somebody put it on eBay and Sauron was flat broke
__________________
Love doesn't blow up and get killed.
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03-30-2007, 07:57 AM | #4743 |
Silver in My Silent Heart
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Unfortunaly, gollum7453 wasn't.
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03-30-2007, 09:11 AM | #4744 |
Ghost Prince of Cardolan
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Fortunately Radagast the Brown mortgaged Rhosgobel
and outbid gollum 7543 to gain possession of the Ring.
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The poster formerly known as Tuor of Gondolin. Walking To Rivendell and beyond 12,555 miles passed Nt./Day 5: Pass the beacon on Nardol, the 'Fire Hill.' |
03-30-2007, 10:14 AM | #4745 |
Spectre of Decay
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Unfortunately, Dark Lord Enterprises PLC owned a controlling interest in his bank.
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Man kenuva métim' andúne? |
03-30-2007, 10:18 AM | #4746 |
Pittodrie Poltergeist
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: trying to find that warm and winding lane again
Posts: 633
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Fortunately, Dark Lord Enterprises PLC succumbed to hostile takeover by Elf Lord's R Us, and then sold off piece by piece
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As Beren looked into her eyes within the shadows of her hair, The trembling starlight of the skies he saw there mirrored shimmering. |
03-30-2007, 12:23 PM | #4747 |
Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: The bottom of the ocean, discussing philosophy with a giant squid
Posts: 2,254
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Unfortunately, Isengard Enterprises had bought out Elf Lords R Us and was basically controlling the whole company.
__________________
I ♣ baby seals. |
03-31-2007, 10:22 AM | #4748 |
Psyche of Prince Immortal
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Fortunately, Erebor-tosh decided to buy out everyone with their hoarded gold
__________________
Love doesn't blow up and get killed.
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03-31-2007, 09:01 PM | #4749 |
Shade of Carn Dûm
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Where the Wargs thrive, a.k.a. Madison, WI
Posts: 437
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Unfortunately, a takeover by Balrogs Inc. left everyone quite sad.
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"Outside of a Warg, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a Warg, it's too dark to read." - Wargo Marx |
03-31-2007, 10:03 PM | #4750 |
Ghost Prince of Cardolan
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Fortunately, the hostile takeover was just an April Fools Day joke.
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Fenris Wolf: WW LXXX. |
04-01-2007, 01:22 AM | #4751 |
Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: I don't know. Eastern ME doesn't have maps.
Posts: 527
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Unfortunately, it was a poor joke extended too far.
__________________
"And forth went Morgoth, and he was halted by the elves. Then went Sauron, who was stopped by a dog and then aged men. Finally, there came the Witch-King, who destroyed Arnor, but nobody seems to remember that." -A History of Villains |
04-01-2007, 12:30 PM | #4752 |
Shade of Carn Dûm
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Where the Wargs thrive, a.k.a. Madison, WI
Posts: 437
|
Fortunately, everyone at least understood the joke.
__________________
"Outside of a Warg, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a Warg, it's too dark to read." - Wargo Marx |
04-01-2007, 03:44 PM | #4753 |
Psyche of Prince Immortal
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Unfortunately, the Orc workers didn't and rioted
__________________
Love doesn't blow up and get killed.
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04-01-2007, 04:20 PM | #4754 |
Guard of the Citadel
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxon
Posts: 2,205
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Fortunately cheap work force from developing countries quickly replaced them
__________________
“The invisible and the non-existent look very much alike.”
Delos B. McKown |
04-01-2007, 05:42 PM | #4755 |
Shade of Carn Dûm
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Where the Wargs thrive, a.k.a. Madison, WI
Posts: 437
|
Unfortunately, the developing countries all simultaneously passed minimum wage laws, making their workforces not so cheap.
__________________
"Outside of a Warg, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a Warg, it's too dark to read." - Wargo Marx |
04-02-2007, 01:23 AM | #4756 |
Wight
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Fortunately, the developing country people did not know of this
__________________
God created night, but man created darkness.... |
04-02-2007, 02:54 AM | #4757 |
Shade of Carn Dûm
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Unfortunately this meant ill for the poor workers.
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04-02-2007, 05:15 AM | #4758 |
Wight
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Dancing on this earth for a short while
Posts: 111
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Fortunately, the orc-union made a deal with their employers, regaining their jobs and sending the scab workers back to their developing country.
__________________
I am against nature. I don't dig nature at all. I think nature is very unnatural. I think the truly natural things are dreams, which nature can't touch with decay. - Bob Dylan |
04-02-2007, 06:16 AM | #4759 |
Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: The bottom of the ocean, discussing philosophy with a giant squid
Posts: 2,254
|
Unfortunately, the deal was that they could go out and burn Minas Tirith to the ground before heading back to work.
__________________
I ♣ baby seals. |
04-02-2007, 12:40 PM | #4760 |
Ghost Prince of Cardolan
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Fortunately Local 3021 of the Guild of Tower Guards were
picketing and orc solidarity led them to join the strike to support their union brothers and sisters (they were striking for equal rights for women in the guards).
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The poster formerly known as Tuor of Gondolin. Walking To Rivendell and beyond 12,555 miles passed Nt./Day 5: Pass the beacon on Nardol, the 'Fire Hill.' |
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