Crazy Captions - Page 106 - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

Witch_Queen · 03-02-2005, 09:27 AM

Cop: Freeze!

Gimli: But I didn't do it! I swear it was Legolas. Please don't put me in jail. I'm not young enough to go to jail.

5 minutes later in the back of a swat car: Policeman turns around to reveal that instead it is Ashton K.

Ashton: Gimli son of Gloin... YOU'VE JUST BEEN PUNKED!!!!

Feanor of the Peredhil · 03-02-2005, 09:46 AM

Gimli looks at Indigorn.

Orcs... very dangerous. You go first.

lord of dor-lomin · 03-02-2005, 09:59 AM

(Gandalf calls down to Gimli)

Don't just stand there! Put your axe in that hole on the tomb, fool of a Gloin! Then the sun will shine through it and show the exact location of the lost Arkenstone. I don't care if there's a big huge troll down there! (mutters) I should've asked Sallah to do this.

TPotSS · 03-02-2005, 10:27 AM

"I didn't ask for a skylight in this room!" Gimli yelled at Legolas.
"But I thought it needed one," Legolas protested as Gimli raised his axe. "It was so... undergroundish in here."
"That's because we ARE underground! And that's the way we dwarves LIKE IT! Balin would be rolling over in his tomb if he knew that some elf had added sunshine and sprinkled sparkly dust in his burial room!"

Evisse the Blue · 03-02-2005, 11:19 AM

Gimli: Turn around? There's a flying saucer behind me? Nice try!!

Eomer of the Rohirrim · 03-02-2005, 11:51 AM

Uh.....Pippin did it.

Nimrodel_9 · 03-02-2005, 05:04 PM

Hi Ho! Hi Ho! It's off to work we go! ....... BALROG!!!!!!!

(I saw that in a comic strip once. I cut it out and still have it.

)

davem · 03-02-2005, 05:16 PM

Gimli attempts (yet again) to lighten the mood by making funny shadow pictures on the wall of Ballin's Tomb...

'And if I hold my axe up like this it makes the shape of a Flamingo!'

Esgallhugwen · 03-02-2005, 09:59 PM

Gimli: Say Hello to my little friend!

Fingolfin II · 03-03-2005, 12:11 AM

They say Dwarves eat rocks, but Gimli went crazy looking for that last piece of chocolate cake.

Nilpaurion Felagund · 03-03-2005, 12:21 AM

Gimli realises that the box behind him is too small to fit a Dwarf in.

The top slowly opens . . .

Lalwendë · 03-03-2005, 03:06 AM

The police helicopter was scrambled when Gimli got his chopper out.

Nilpaurion Felagund · 03-03-2005, 03:25 AM

Gimli didn't notice the "bottom" area of his clothes melting.

Maeggaladiel · 03-03-2005, 10:45 AM

Legolas- It's a bright white stone coffin illuminated by piercing blue neon! How can he NOT see it?! And I thought MEN were blind!

Eomer of the Rohirrim · 03-03-2005, 11:06 AM

Bloodthirsty Orcs? Portal to another dimension.....

What would my dad do?

Fordim Hedgethistle · 03-03-2005, 11:10 AM

Gimli

You put your right axe in,
You take your right axe out,
You hack the orc's head off,
And you shake it all about.
You do the hacky-slashy
And you turn yourself about.
That's what it's all about!

narfforc · 03-03-2005, 11:38 AM

Gimli, you are Glowingson, and are at the cutting edge of Dwarven Technology.

Garen LiLorian · 03-03-2005, 11:49 AM

That's right, ladies and gentlemen, for a mere 19.99$ you can be the proud owner of this amazing axe! Order now, and you'll also recieve this one of a kind special edition companion axe at no additional charge. Note the fine Dwarven craftsmanship as our lovely Gimlina shows off this one of a kind craftspiece. Order today!

Dial 1-800-Gimli-Axe Today!

Encaitare · 03-03-2005, 08:19 PM

Run to Balin's tomb, in the coffin on the left you'll find my favorite axe... Don't look so frightened, this is just a passing phase, one of my bad days...

Esgallhugwen · 03-03-2005, 08:38 PM

Narrator: Gimli, how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsy pop?

Gimli: How should I know. I do know how many axe strikes it takes to get to the center of an orc though!

Nirvana II · 03-03-2005, 08:59 PM

cant...stop...transform---aaargh!

GIMLI SMASH!!!!

Nilpaurion Felagund · 03-03-2005, 09:50 PM

Gimli: Right, Bloom. That's the last time you call me Shorty.

Gurthang · 03-03-2005, 10:09 PM

Gimili gives new meaning to the words a powerful fart.

And

Nobody had realized that Gimli had had cancer until all the radiation treatment that had been trapped inside him was suddenly released.

narfforc · 03-04-2005, 10:38 AM

Gimli: Kiss my Axe

Oddwen · 03-04-2005, 11:10 AM

And suddenly, Eru changed his mind about Elves, and bestowed his favor on the Dwarves. Legolas was not pleased.

Fingolfin II · 03-04-2005, 11:56 PM

Aragorn soon begins to realise that he shouldn't have told Gimli to 'Tear up the place' at his coronation...

Lhunardawen · 03-05-2005, 12:45 AM

After being enlightened at the Chapter-by-Chapter discussions, Gimli demonstrates to the rest of the Fellowship how Saruman breaks the light.

Boromir88 · 03-05-2005, 09:13 AM

Gimli: Step up and see this new pic, it's really brought out in the light...

When I asked for a Black rider express delivery agent, I didn't mean for them to send NINE of them!

The Elf-warrior · 03-05-2005, 09:54 AM

People wondered how Harry the gatekeeper was able to afford a swimming pool on his gatekeeper salary.

Hookbill the Goomba · 03-05-2005, 10:22 AM

Harry: Hobbits!? Eight of them!?

Pippin: See, I told you Bree pipe weed was strong stuff!

Formendacil · 03-05-2005, 11:41 AM

Harry: "Wargs! Four Wargs!!! And out of the Chetwood by their talk!!"

Nimrodel_9 · 03-05-2005, 02:24 PM

Harry sees Gandalf the Grey uncloaked.

HerenIstarion · 03-05-2005, 03:43 PM

Gimli pic:

Gimli: the director of this movie really likes stressing things, doesn't he? Putting strong accents, eh? In the book, I had an axe. Probably I polished it too, and called it by the name. Chaps in the books of the kind always do. Why the heck do I have three axes in this movie? I'm not surprised one of them is that rusty. I have two arms, after all, don't I?

Harry pic:

Harry has the latter brought by an owl post read to him by Barliman - the only lattered man for miles around. Harry Porter is invited to join certain school of witchcraft and wizardry...

Oddwen · 03-06-2005, 12:18 AM

Harry: Get out, or I'll call the Brute Squad!
Khamul: I'm onna Bchwute S'uad.
Harry: You *are* the Brute Squad!

Maeggaladiel · 03-06-2005, 02:03 AM

It is a little known fact that Harry the Gatekeeper originally tried out for the Blair Witch Project.

Gil-Galad · 03-06-2005, 08:42 AM

Harry "I see a little silouhette of a hobbit"

Hobbits: Scaramouche,scaramouche will you do the fandango

Nazgul: Thunder Bolts and lightning very very frightening!

Harry: Gallieo! Gallieo! Gallieo Magnifico!

Eomer of the Rohirrim · 03-06-2005, 01:55 PM

#14 - Stepped on a thumbtack.

THE Ka · 03-06-2005, 03:46 PM

Harry: " What do you mean I can't join the Cynical Mucky Wet Door Men's Union!? I have an Attitude! See-"

The nasgul are sent in...

~Ka

elronds_daughter · 03-06-2005, 04:51 PM

Harry the gatekeeper was regretting his request for X-ray vision...

THE Ka · 03-07-2005, 01:27 AM

i found this while thinking about breakfast...

Faramir thinks to himself: "Why are those orcs rubbing their bellies and licking their lips? Don't they know that breakfast hour ended 20 minutes ago?"

Enjoy... I know you all will.

~Ka

03-02-2005, 09:27 AM	#4201
Witch_Queen Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Pandora's box... "LET ME OUT OF HERE!" Posts: 344	Cop: Freeze! Gimli: But I didn't do it! I swear it was Legolas. Please don't put me in jail. I'm not young enough to go to jail. 5 minutes later in the back of a swat car: Policeman turns around to reveal that instead it is Ashton K. Ashton: Gimli son of Gloin... YOU'VE JUST BEEN PUNKED!!!! __________________ And when this life is over... and I stand before the God... I'll dream I'm back here standing in my nowhere land of Oz.....

03-02-2005, 09:46 AM	#4202
Feanor of the Peredhil La Belle Dame sans Merci Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: perpetual uncertainty Posts: 5,517	Gimli looks at Indigorn. Orcs... very dangerous. You go first. __________________ peace Last edited by Feanor of the Peredhil; 03-02-2005 at 03:39 PM. Reason: italICKs

03-02-2005, 09:59 AM	#4203
lord of dor-lomin Wight Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: dor-lomin, of course Posts: 167	Raiders of the Lost Ark(enstone) (Gandalf calls down to Gimli) Don't just stand there! Put your axe in that hole on the tomb, fool of a Gloin! Then the sun will shine through it and show the exact location of the lost Arkenstone. I don't care if there's a big huge troll down there! (mutters) I should've asked Sallah to do this. __________________ I used to be indecisive. Now, I'm not so sure. Last edited by lord of dor-lomin; 03-02-2005 at 11:27 AM.

03-02-2005, 10:27 AM	#4204
TPotSS Animated Skeleton Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: the captain's chair Posts: 42	"I didn't ask for a skylight in this room!" Gimli yelled at Legolas. "But I thought it needed one," Legolas protested as Gimli raised his axe. "It was so... undergroundish in here." "That's because we ARE underground! And that's the way we dwarves LIKE IT! Balin would be rolling over in his tomb if he knew that some elf had added sunshine and sprinkled sparkly dust in his burial room!" __________________ You can't be a great painter. You only have one ear.

03-02-2005, 11:19 AM	#4205
Evisse the Blue Brightness of a Blade Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: wherever I may roam Posts: 2,685	Gimli: Turn around? There's a flying saucer behind me? Nice try!! __________________ And no one was ill, and everyone was pleased, except those who had to mow the grass.

03-02-2005, 11:51 AM	#4206
Eomer of the Rohirrim Auspicious Wraith Join Date: May 2002 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 4,859	Uh.....Pippin did it. __________________ Los Ingobernables de Harlond

03-02-2005, 05:04 PM	#4207
Nimrodel_9 Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Utah Posts: 734	Hi Ho! Hi Ho! It's off to work we go! ....... BALROG!!!!!!! (I saw that in a comic strip once. I cut it out and still have it. ) __________________ .:A friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart:.

03-02-2005, 05:16 PM	#4208
davem Illustrious Ulair Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: In the home of lost causes, and forsaken beliefs, and unpopular names,and impossible loyalties Posts: 4,240	Gimli attempts (yet again) to lighten the mood by making funny shadow pictures on the wall of Ballin's Tomb... 'And if I hold my axe up like this it makes the shape of a Flamingo!' __________________ “Everything was an object. If you killed a dwarf you could use it as a weapon – it was no different to other large heavy objects."

03-02-2005, 09:59 PM	#4209
Esgallhugwen Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Where the Moon cries against the snow Posts: 526	Gimli: Say Hello to my little friend! __________________ "...for the sin of the idolater is not that he worships stone, but that he worships one stone over others. -8:9:4 The Witness of Fane"

03-03-2005, 12:11 AM	#4210
Fingolfin II Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Where you want me to be Posts: 1,036	They say Dwarves eat rocks, but Gimli went crazy looking for that last piece of chocolate cake. __________________ Et Eärello Endorenna utúlien. Sinome maruvan ar Hildinyar tenn' Ambar-metta.

03-03-2005, 12:21 AM	#4211
Nilpaurion Felagund Scion of The Faithful Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: The brink, where hope and despair are akin. [The Philippines] Posts: 5,312	Chucky in Moria. Gimli realises that the box behind him is too small to fit a Dwarf in. The top slowly opens . . . __________________ フェンリス鴨 (Fenrisu Kamo) The plot, cut, defeated. I intend to copy this sig forever - so far so good...

03-03-2005, 03:06 AM	#4212
Lalwendë A Mere Boggart Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: under the bed Posts: 4,737	The police helicopter was scrambled when Gimli got his chopper out. __________________ Gordon's alive!

03-03-2005, 03:25 AM	#4213
Nilpaurion Felagund Scion of The Faithful Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: The brink, where hope and despair are akin. [The Philippines] Posts: 5,312	What's with microwaveable clothing? Gimli didn't notice the "bottom" area of his clothes melting. __________________ フェンリス鴨 (Fenrisu Kamo) The plot, cut, defeated. I intend to copy this sig forever - so far so good...

03-03-2005, 10:45 AM	#4214
Maeggaladiel Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: The end of the world as we know it. I feel fine, incidentally. Posts: 500	Legolas- It's a bright white stone coffin illuminated by piercing blue neon! How can he NOT see it?! And I thought MEN were blind! __________________ "Wide ne bith wel," cwaeth se the geheirde on helle hriman.

03-03-2005, 11:06 AM	#4215
Eomer of the Rohirrim Auspicious Wraith Join Date: May 2002 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 4,859	Gimli's dilemma Bloodthirsty Orcs? Portal to another dimension..... What would my dad do? __________________ Los Ingobernables de Harlond

03-03-2005, 11:10 AM	#4216
Fordim Hedgethistle Gibbering Gibbet Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Beyond cloud nine Posts: 1,844	Gimli You put your right axe in, You take your right axe out, You hack the orc's head off, And you shake it all about. You do the hacky-slashy And you turn yourself about. That's what it's all about!

03-03-2005, 11:38 AM	#4217
narfforc Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Muddy-earth Posts: 1,297	Gimli, you are Glowingson, and are at the cutting edge of Dwarven Technology.

03-03-2005, 11:49 AM	#4218
Garen LiLorian Wight Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: The frigid white wilderness of the Midwest Posts: 235	That's right, ladies and gentlemen, for a mere 19.99$ you can be the proud owner of this amazing axe! Order now, and you'll also recieve this one of a kind special edition companion axe at no additional charge. Note the fine Dwarven craftsmanship as our lovely Gimlina shows off this one of a kind craftspiece. Order today! Dial 1-800-Gimli-Axe Today! __________________ This is my quest, to follow that star; no matter how hopeless, no matter how far. To fight for the right, without question or pause. To be willing to march into Hell for a Heavenly cause! -Man of La Mancha

03-03-2005, 08:19 PM	#4219
Encaitare Bittersweet Symphony Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: On the jolly starship Enterprise Posts: 1,814	Blatant Floyd Rip-off Run to Balin's tomb, in the coffin on the left you'll find my favorite axe... Don't look so frightened, this is just a passing phase, one of my bad days...

03-03-2005, 08:38 PM	#4220
Esgallhugwen Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Where the Moon cries against the snow Posts: 526	Narrator: Gimli, how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsy pop? Gimli: How should I know. I do know how many axe strikes it takes to get to the center of an orc though! __________________ "...for the sin of the idolater is not that he worships stone, but that he worships one stone over others. -8:9:4 The Witness of Fane"

03-03-2005, 08:59 PM	#4221
Nirvana II Wight Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: The Yellow Submarine....sandwich Posts: 207	cant...stop...transform---aaargh! GIMLI SMASH!!!! __________________ Это - российская вещь, Вы не поняли бы. Вы - пончик желе! Я оказался снова. Частное сообщение меня, если Вы понимаете.

03-03-2005, 09:50 PM	#4222
Nilpaurion Felagund Scion of The Faithful Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: The brink, where hope and despair are akin. [The Philippines] Posts: 5,312	Blatant davem rip-off. Gimli: Right, Bloom. That's the last time you call me Shorty. __________________ フェンリス鴨 (Fenrisu Kamo) The plot, cut, defeated. I intend to copy this sig forever - so far so good...

03-03-2005, 10:09 PM	#4223
Gurthang Sword of Spirit Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Oh, I'm around. Posts: 1,401	A little gas...(again) Gimili gives new meaning to the words a powerful fart. And Nobody had realized that Gimli had had cancer until all the radiation treatment that had been trapped inside him was suddenly released. __________________ I'm on a Mission from God.

03-04-2005, 10:38 AM	#4224
narfforc Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Muddy-earth Posts: 1,297	Gimli: Kiss my Axe

03-04-2005, 11:10 AM	#4225
Oddwen Drummer in the Deep Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Next Sunday A.D. Posts: 2,145	And suddenly, Eru changed his mind about Elves, and bestowed his favor on the Dwarves. Legolas was not pleased. __________________ But all the while I sit and think of times there were before I listen for returning feet and voices at the door

03-04-2005, 11:56 PM	#4226
Fingolfin II Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Where you want me to be Posts: 1,036	Aragorn soon begins to realise that he shouldn't have told Gimli to 'Tear up the place' at his coronation... __________________ Et Eärello Endorenna utúlien. Sinome maruvan ar Hildinyar tenn' Ambar-metta.

03-05-2005, 12:45 AM	#4227
Lhunardawen Hauntress of the Havens Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: IN it, but not OF it Posts: 2,538	After being enlightened at the Chapter-by-Chapter discussions, Gimli demonstrates to the rest of the Fellowship how Saruman breaks the light.

03-05-2005, 09:13 AM	#4228
Boromir88 Laconic Loreman Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: USA Posts: 7,518	Gimli: Step up and see this new pic, it's really brought out in the light... When I asked for a Black rider express delivery agent, I didn't mean for them to send NINE of them!

03-05-2005, 09:54 AM	#4229
The Elf-warrior Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Virginia. Posts: 952	People wondered how Harry the gatekeeper was able to afford a swimming pool on his gatekeeper salary. __________________ Fenris Wolf: WW LXXX.

03-05-2005, 10:22 AM	#4230
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	Harry: Hobbits!? Eight of them!? Pippin: See, I told you Bree pipe weed was strong stuff! __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

03-05-2005, 11:41 AM	#4231
Formendacil Dead Serious Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Perched on Thangorodrim's towers. Posts: 3,326	Harry: "Wargs! Four Wargs!!! And out of the Chetwood by their talk!!" __________________ I prefer history, true or feigned.

03-05-2005, 02:24 PM	#4232
Nimrodel_9 Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Utah Posts: 734	And again... Harry sees Gandalf the Grey uncloaked. __________________ .:A friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart:.

03-05-2005, 03:43 PM	#4233
HerenIstarion Deadnight Chanter Join Date: Sep 2000 Posts: 4,244	Gimli pic: Gimli: the director of this movie really likes stressing things, doesn't he? Putting strong accents, eh? In the book, I had an axe. Probably I polished it too, and called it by the name. Chaps in the books of the kind always do. Why the heck do I have three axes in this movie? I'm not surprised one of them is that rusty. I have two arms, after all, don't I? Harry pic: Harry has the latter brought by an owl post read to him by Barliman - the only lattered man for miles around. Harry Porter is invited to join certain school of witchcraft and wizardry... __________________ Egroeg Ihkhsal - Would you believe in the love at first sight? - Yes I'm certain that it happens all the time!

03-06-2005, 12:18 AM	#4234
Oddwen Drummer in the Deep Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Next Sunday A.D. Posts: 2,145	Miracle Harry Harry: Get out, or I'll call the Brute Squad! Khamul: I'm onna Bchwute S'uad. Harry: You are the Brute Squad! __________________ But all the while I sit and think of times there were before I listen for returning feet and voices at the door

03-06-2005, 02:03 AM	#4235
Maeggaladiel Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: The end of the world as we know it. I feel fine, incidentally. Posts: 500	It is a little known fact that Harry the Gatekeeper originally tried out for the Blair Witch Project. __________________ "Wide ne bith wel," cwaeth se the geheirde on helle hriman.