Crazy Captions - Page 355 - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

Inziladun · 11-26-2018, 05:35 PM

"I assure you Théoden, there are indeed talking trees, and my cousin Radagast has not been having me try his new mushroom hybrids."

Kuruharan · 12-19-2018, 09:17 AM

Gandalf: And now for slide #387 of The Greatest Hits of Gandalf Uncloaking!

Galadriel55 · 04-13-2019, 08:35 PM

- Gandalf, my country is in ruin. The armies are scattered, the treasuries are emptied, my people do not trust in me anymore. What should I do?

- Hang every nobleman and pain Meduseld blue.

- But why blue?

- I knew there would be no issues with the first proposal.

Alphaelin · 09-06-2019, 12:36 AM

Gandalf: "...and that's how I got past the Balrog on the 100th level in Moria. Now, on level 99 we duked it out with rocks..."

Theoden: :If I was still under Saruman's spell, I wouldn't have to listen to this.:

Inziladun · 09-20-2019, 07:05 AM

"See, Théoden, I had this dream once that I wore a silly helmet and could control metal."

"Just a minute, folks. I want to sketch this scene for your tombs....er, for history."

Galadriel55 · 09-20-2019, 06:17 PM

- Elrond, are Elves supposed to get a growth spurt when they reach a couple thousand years, or were you drinking the Ent-draught again?

Rune Son of Bjarne · 11-07-2019, 02:49 AM

Much to the dismay of the Fellowship, and due to unfortunate incidents in the past, Elrond explained in no uncertain terms, that elvish hospitality did not extend to naked frolicking in public fountains.

Kuruharan · 12-19-2019, 05:03 PM

Alright, we know that one of you is the culprit who ate all the cake.

Oddwen · 12-26-2019, 10:51 AM

Erestor: We've rounded up the usual suspects Elrond, can you point out which one stole your wallet?

Rune Son of Bjarne · 01-07-2020, 03:16 PM

Hugo Weaving was very happy to announce that in order to "corner the market", he had managed to convince New Line and Peter Jackson to film Lord of the Rings as well as a porno parody silmutaniously using the same cast.

***Thenamir*** · 03-23-2020, 02:38 PM

Scene from the new movie, "Honey, I Shrunk The Fellowship"

THE Ka · 03-25-2020, 09:05 PM

"No one leaves here alive until one of you lot confesses who took Priscilla on a joyride across the Bruinen."

Kuruharan · 12-19-2020, 04:22 PM

Good Morning Class!

Welcome to Hair Weaving 401! This is the capstone course for this major and by the end of the course you are expected to be able to recreate the magificent weave I am currently sporting on the back of my head.

Boromir88 · 12-20-2020, 09:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kuruharan

Good Morning Class!

Welcome to Hair Weaving 401! This is the capstone course for this major and by the end of the course you are expected to be able to recreate the magificent weave I am currently sporting on the back of my head.

Hair Weaving 401 with Hugo!

Kuruharan · 12-21-2020, 02:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Boromir88

Hair Weaving 401 with Hugo!

You figured out my inspiration for the joke!

Rune Son of Bjarne · 04-09-2021, 01:47 AM

Elrond started to doubt his own judgment, when he for the thousand time had to scold the Fellowship for turning on all the torches in broad daylight.

Formendacil · 04-09-2021, 05:30 PM

Elrond: "You've already had breakfast."

The whole Fellowship, now converted to Hobbit ways: **A STARE, DENOTING THEY HAVE HAD ONE, YES, BUT WHAT ABOUT SECOND BREAKFAST**

Rune Son of Bjarne · 04-10-2021, 08:24 PM

At roll call Gimli managed to cover-up the absence of the rest of the fellowship, by the strategic placement of cardboard cut-outs and Elrond seemed none the wiser.

Galadriel55 · 04-10-2021, 09:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Formendacil

Elrond: "You've already had breakfast."

The whole Fellowship, now converted to Hobbit ways: **A STARE, DENOTING THEY HAVE HAD ONE, YES, BUT WHAT ABOUT SECOND BREAKFAST**

Yes, Elrond, we are staging a protest to demand the right for second breakfast. And if you refuse to comply, we will start operating under a new slogan: "Gondor needs no pants".

Rune Son of Bjarne · 04-11-2021, 03:14 PM

"Listen guys you have been loitering here since 2019, don't you have a mountain to catch?"

Gandalf was tempted by the Ring, but in the end his germaphobia ensured that he would never claim it for his own.

Inziladun · 04-11-2021, 04:40 PM

"Heavens Frodo, that is a nasty hangnail!"

Formendacil · 04-11-2021, 04:44 PM

Even with Frodo holding the One Ring out immediately before him, Gandalf still couldn't take his eyes off the hobbit's prodigious feet.

Frodo: "Hey! Gandalf! My eyes are up here!"

Legate of Amon Lanc · 04-14-2021, 01:34 AM

The hypnosis content was heading towards a stalemate after one and half hours of Frodo just repeating "you are sleepy... so very sleeepy..." and Gandalf repeating "follow my fingers' movement..."

narfforc · 07-04-2021, 11:38 AM

Ah, cheese Hula Hoops, my favourite said Gandalf

Kuruharan · 12-19-2021, 08:33 AM

Is THIS your ring..?

Galadriel55 · 12-19-2021, 08:45 PM

After a few pints at the Green Dragon, Gandalf was rather struggling to get his finger to the intended target.

Rune Son of Bjarne · 01-22-2022, 06:47 PM

Frodo quickly realised that the Magic of Gandalf mainly consisted of making items "float" in mid air with the cunning use of very thin string.

Oddwen · 01-26-2022, 11:14 PM

"Good heavens, no, no, no!" cried Gandalf. "That's the little piggy that went 'wee wee wee' all the way home, THAT little piggy went to market!"

Gil-Galad · 09-25-2022, 01:56 AM

Gandalf always considered himself "hip with the kids" and was tempted to try the latest craze since West Farthing Leaf.

Frodo didn't know where this old magic man came from.

Kuruharan · 12-19-2022, 10:52 AM

Frodo: Come on, Gandalf, shake my hand!

*bzzt*

Gandalf: Ouch!

Frodo: Gotcha! I can't believe you fell for that!

Andsigil · 02-04-2023, 06:49 AM

Doesn't really need a caption, but a friend sent me this and I thought you might enjoy.

Kuruharan · 12-19-2023, 08:26 AM

Old Woman: I don't want to eat it and you can't make me!

Oddwen · 01-25-2024, 01:42 PM

I sit beside the fire and think of all that I have cooked,
Of veggies, herbs, meats and broth that oh so fresh had looked
Or at least were not much spoiled in autumns that there were,
I could not sit for long downwind, so don't mind all the hair.
I sit beside the fire and think of how this meal will be,
For any who can stomach it, forsooth! twill not be me!

For still there are so many things that I have never eaten
In every pot on every fire there is a different green
I sit beside the fire and think of lunches long ago,
And people who will have a snack that I shall never know.
While all the while I sit and stew at what I've stewed before,
I listen for retreating feet and noises from thrown bowls

Rune Son of Bjarne · 01-27-2024, 02:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Oddwen

I sit beside the fire and think of all that I have cooked,
Of veggies, herbs, meats and broth that oh so fresh had looked
Or at least were not much spoiled in autumns that there were,
I could not sit for long downwind, so don't mind all the hair.
I sit beside the fire and think of how this meal will be,
For any who can stomach it, forsooth! twill not be me!

For still there are so many things that I have never eaten
In every pot on every fire there is a different green
I sit beside the fire and think of lunches long ago,
And people who will have a snack that I shall never know.
While all the while I sit and stew at what I've stewed before,
I listen for retreating feet and noises from thrown bowls

What a jingle for a Middle-Earth themed cooking show!

11-26-2018, 05:35 PM	#14161
Inziladun Gruesome Spectre Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: Heaven's doorstep Posts: 8,037	"I assure you Théoden, there are indeed talking trees, and my cousin Radagast has not been having me try his new mushroom hybrids." __________________ Music alone proves the existence of God.

12-19-2018, 09:17 AM	#14162
Kuruharan Regal Dwarven Shade Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: A Remote Dwarven Hold Posts: 3,589	I can't believe somebody didn't say this already Gandalf: And now for slide #387 of The Greatest Hits of Gandalf Uncloaking! __________________ ...finding a path that cannot be found, walking a road that cannot be seen, climbing a ladder that was never placed, or reading a paragraph that has no...

04-13-2019, 08:35 PM	#14163
Galadriel55 Blossom of Dwimordene Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: The realm of forgotten words Posts: 10,380	- Gandalf, my country is in ruin. The armies are scattered, the treasuries are emptied, my people do not trust in me anymore. What should I do? - Hang every nobleman and pain Meduseld blue. - But why blue? - I knew there would be no issues with the first proposal. __________________ You passed from under darkened dome, you enter now the secret land. - Take me to Finrod's fabled home!... ~ Finrod: The Rock Opera

09-06-2019, 12:36 AM	#14164
Alphaelin Wight Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Tottering about in the Wild Posts: 130	Gandalf: "...and that's how I got past the Balrog on the 100th level in Moria. Now, on level 99 we duked it out with rocks..." Theoden: :If I was still under Saruman's spell, I wouldn't have to listen to this.: __________________ Not all those who wander are lost . . . because some of us know how to read a map.

09-20-2019, 07:05 AM	#14165
Inziladun Gruesome Spectre Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: Heaven's doorstep Posts: 8,037	"See, Théoden, I had this dream once that I wore a silly helmet and could control metal." "Just a minute, folks. I want to sketch this scene for your tombs....er, for history." __________________ Music alone proves the existence of God.

09-20-2019, 06:17 PM	#14166
Galadriel55 Blossom of Dwimordene Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: The realm of forgotten words Posts: 10,380	- Elrond, are Elves supposed to get a growth spurt when they reach a couple thousand years, or were you drinking the Ent-draught again? __________________ You passed from under darkened dome, you enter now the secret land. - Take me to Finrod's fabled home!... ~ Finrod: The Rock Opera

12-19-2019, 05:03 PM	#14168
Kuruharan Regal Dwarven Shade Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: A Remote Dwarven Hold Posts: 3,589	Alright, we know that one of you is the culprit who ate all the cake. __________________ ...finding a path that cannot be found, walking a road that cannot be seen, climbing a ladder that was never placed, or reading a paragraph that has no...

12-26-2019, 10:51 AM	#14169
Oddwen Drummer in the Deep Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Next Sunday A.D. Posts: 2,145	Erestor: We've rounded up the usual suspects Elrond, can you point out which one stole your wallet? __________________ But all the while I sit and think of times there were before I listen for returning feet and voices at the door

03-23-2020, 02:38 PM	#14171
*Thenamir* Spectre of Capitalism Join Date: May 2001 Location: Battling evil bureaucrats at Zeta Aquilae Posts: 987	Scene from the new movie, "Honey, I Shrunk The Fellowship" __________________ The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane. ~~ Marcus Aurelius

03-25-2020, 09:05 PM	#14172
THE Ka Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: As with the flygja Posts: 1,403	"No one leaves here alive until one of you lot confesses who took Priscilla on a joyride across the Bruinen." __________________ Vinur, vinur skilur tú meg? Veitst tú ongan loyniveg? Hevur tú reikað líka sum eg, í endaleysu tokuni?

12-19-2020, 04:22 PM	#14173
Kuruharan Regal Dwarven Shade Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: A Remote Dwarven Hold Posts: 3,589	Good Morning Class! Welcome to Hair Weaving 401! This is the capstone course for this major and by the end of the course you are expected to be able to recreate the magificent weave I am currently sporting on the back of my head. __________________ ...finding a path that cannot be found, walking a road that cannot be seen, climbing a ladder that was never placed, or reading a paragraph that has no...

04-09-2021, 05:30 PM	#14177
Formendacil Dead Serious Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Perched on Thangorodrim's towers. Posts: 3,326	Elrond: "You've already had breakfast." The whole Fellowship, now converted to Hobbit ways: A STARE, DENOTING THEY HAVE HAD ONE, YES, BUT WHAT ABOUT SECOND BREAKFAST __________________ I prefer history, true or feigned.

04-11-2021, 04:40 PM	#14181
Inziladun Gruesome Spectre Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: Heaven's doorstep Posts: 8,037	"Heavens Frodo, that is a nasty hangnail!" __________________ Music alone proves the existence of God.

04-11-2021, 04:44 PM	#14182
Formendacil Dead Serious Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Perched on Thangorodrim's towers. Posts: 3,326	Even with Frodo holding the One Ring out immediately before him, Gandalf still couldn't take his eyes off the hobbit's prodigious feet. Frodo: "Hey! Gandalf! My eyes are up here!" __________________ I prefer history, true or feigned. Last edited by Formendacil; 04-12-2021 at 04:33 PM. Reason: Spelling

04-14-2021, 01:34 AM	#14183
Legate of Amon Lanc A Voice That Gainsayeth Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: In that far land beyond the Sea Posts: 7,431	The hypnosis content was heading towards a stalemate after one and half hours of Frodo just repeating "you are sleepy... so very sleeepy..." and Gandalf repeating "follow my fingers' movement..." __________________ "Should the story say 'he ate bread,' the dramatic producer can only show 'a piece of bread' according to his taste or fancy, but the hearer of the story will think of bread in general and picture it in some form of his own." -On Fairy-Stories

07-04-2021, 11:38 AM	#14184
narfforc Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Muddy-earth Posts: 1,297	Ah, cheese Hula Hoops, my favourite said Gandalf __________________ [B]THE LORD OF THE GRINS:THE ONE PARODY....A PARODY BETTER THAN THE RINGS OF POWER.

12-19-2021, 08:33 AM	#14185
Kuruharan Regal Dwarven Shade Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: A Remote Dwarven Hold Posts: 3,589	Is THIS your ring..? __________________ ...finding a path that cannot be found, walking a road that cannot be seen, climbing a ladder that was never placed, or reading a paragraph that has no...

12-19-2021, 08:45 PM	#14186
Galadriel55 Blossom of Dwimordene Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: The realm of forgotten words Posts: 10,380	After a few pints at the Green Dragon, Gandalf was rather struggling to get his finger to the intended target. __________________ You passed from under darkened dome, you enter now the secret land. - Take me to Finrod's fabled home!... ~ Finrod: The Rock Opera

01-26-2022, 11:14 PM	#14188
Oddwen Drummer in the Deep Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Next Sunday A.D. Posts: 2,145	"Good heavens, no, no, no!" cried Gandalf. "That's the little piggy that went 'wee wee wee' all the way home, THAT little piggy went to market!" __________________ But all the while I sit and think of times there were before I listen for returning feet and voices at the door

09-25-2022, 01:56 AM	#14189
Gil-Galad Psyche of Prince Immortal Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Above a Parapet Obvious exits are: North, South, and Dennis Posts: 4,734	Gandalf always considered himself "hip with the kids" and was tempted to try the latest craze since West Farthing Leaf. Frodo didn't know where this old magic man came from. __________________ Love doesn't blow up and get killed.

12-19-2022, 10:52 AM	#14190
Kuruharan Regal Dwarven Shade Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: A Remote Dwarven Hold Posts: 3,589	Frodo: Come on, Gandalf, shake my hand! *bzzt* Gandalf: Ouch! Frodo: Gotcha! I can't believe you fell for that! __________________ ...finding a path that cannot be found, walking a road that cannot be seen, climbing a ladder that was never placed, or reading a paragraph that has no...

12-19-2023, 08:26 AM	#14192
Kuruharan Regal Dwarven Shade Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: A Remote Dwarven Hold Posts: 3,589	Old Woman: I don't want to eat it and you can't make me! __________________ ...finding a path that cannot be found, walking a road that cannot be seen, climbing a ladder that was never placed, or reading a paragraph that has no...

01-25-2024, 01:42 PM	#14193
Oddwen Drummer in the Deep Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Next Sunday A.D. Posts: 2,145	I sit beside the fire and think of all that I have cooked, Of veggies, herbs, meats and broth that oh so fresh had looked Or at least were not much spoiled in autumns that there were, I could not sit for long downwind, so don't mind all the hair. I sit beside the fire and think of how this meal will be, For any who can stomach it, forsooth! twill not be me! For still there are so many things that I have never eaten In every pot on every fire there is a different green I sit beside the fire and think of lunches long ago, And people who will have a snack that I shall never know. While all the while I sit and stew at what I've stewed before, I listen for retreating feet and noises from thrown bowls __________________ But all the while I sit and think of times there were before I listen for returning feet and voices at the door