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12-22-2011, 10:10 AM
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#1 |
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Newly Deceased
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 2
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If Sauron came to you with 1,000,000 orcs, you would...
What would you do?
I'd kill them with my sword, but that is me. |
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12-22-2011, 10:22 AM
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#2 | |
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Gruesome Spectre
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Heaven's doorstep
Posts: 8,037
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Quote:
Personally, I'd start singing a soothing tune, and slowly back away while they all stood dumbfounded.
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Music alone proves the existence of God. |
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01-20-2012, 12:15 PM
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#3 |
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Mellifluous Maia
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: A glade open to the stars, deep in Nan Elmoth
Posts: 3,489
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I would tell him it wasn't nearly enough for my purposes and not to bother me again until he had recruited a proper army. I would then suggest, should this unsatisfactory performance continue, he might lose that promotion to the balrog (a real self-starter).
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01-21-2012, 05:08 AM
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#4 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Muddy-earth
Posts: 1,297
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Set my 100 million Elves on him............
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[B]THE LORD OF THE GRINS:THE ONE PARODY....A PARODY BETTER THAN THE RINGS OF POWER. |
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01-21-2012, 08:36 AM
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#5 |
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Blossom of Dwimordene
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: The realm of forgotten words
Posts: 10,401
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Tell them they've come too late.
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You passed from under darkened dome, you enter now the secret land. - Take me to Finrod's fabled home!... ~ Finrod: The Rock Opera |
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01-21-2012, 10:31 AM
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#6 |
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Wight
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Behind you . . . . BOO!
Posts: 222
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Sic the cats on 'em.
Hoestly, have you ever seen what a thrown cat can do to somebody? Well, neither have I, but I can't imagine it would be pretty. Then I would run over to the local cat-breeder for more ammunition, which rather than causing a swath of destruction through the Orc ranks (ours are so irritable!), would distract them all through sheer cuteness long enough for me to run away. Any who tried to chase after us would trip over the cats circling their ankles. Alternatively, set up a bunch of hilarious traps (mostly involving cats), then pull out my practice bow (complete with roundish-tipped arrows), toy sword (an accessory for a game), and two Wii remotes (hey, one of the available games is "swordplay," so they should work in real life, right?) and hope they all die of laughter before I'm forced to actually make a last stand. |
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01-24-2012, 01:29 PM
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#7 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: midway upon... in a forest dark
Posts: 975
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Prolly get them to sign a petition for any cause I might be sponsoring at the moment; a million's a lot of signatures!
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01-24-2012, 05:10 PM
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#8 | |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: The Deepest Forges of Ered Luin
Posts: 733
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Quote:
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Even as fog continues to lie in the valleys, so does ancient sin cling to the low places, the depression in the world consciousness. |
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02-14-2012, 04:30 AM
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#9 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Lonely Isle
Posts: 706
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Call upon the Legolas fans for help
Call upon all the legions of Legolas fans for help, saying that once I'm dealt with he'll be next on Sauron's list.
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07-26-2012, 04:41 PM
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#10 |
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Shade of Carn Dūm
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Henneth Annūn, Ithilien
Posts: 462
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Throw man flesh at them, like that stuff fishers do to lure sharks, and run. What I'm doing with human parts that I can throw at people, don't ask. I think I might have had an argument with someone earlier.
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"For believe me: the secret for harvesting from existence the greatest fruitfulness and the greatest enjoyment is - to live dangerously!" - G.S.; F. Nietzsche |
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11-13-2012, 11:35 PM
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#11 |
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Animated Skeleton
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 47
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Run up a huge mountain using my elf fitness skills and shoot them down, one by one. (while yelling horrible things at them)
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02-26-2013, 11:52 PM
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#12 |
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Pile O'Bones
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 21
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Bow down to him, like we should anyways.
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02-27-2013, 09:00 AM
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#13 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Lonely Isle
Posts: 706
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What would I do?
Pretend that I'm Morgoth returned, give out about how they've all gone soft, then tell them all to go back home and not return until they're evil enough.
Last edited by Faramir Jones; 02-27-2013 at 09:11 AM. |
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05-29-2013, 06:48 PM
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#14 |
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Newly Deceased
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 3
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I would have a pressing engagement elsewhere and hightail it out of there as quickly as possible.
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03-06-2014, 01:36 AM
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#15 |
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Animated Skeleton
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Rivendell (duh)
Posts: 37
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Run.
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04-16-2014, 02:27 AM
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#16 |
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Wight
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: far away,in the southern arda
Posts: 153
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I would have called godzilla and told him to stomp on them.it would be an orcs massacre
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Fly,you fools!-gandalf,the bridge of khazad dūm |
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04-16-2014, 03:13 AM
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#17 |
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Shade of Carn Dūm
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 265
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Fight until my last breath. That'd be the best thing to do.
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A short saying oft contains much wisdom. ~Sophocles |
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04-16-2014, 09:31 AM
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#18 |
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Wight
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: far away,in the southern arda
Posts: 153
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Plead to eru to destroy them all and kill sauron.
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Fly,you fools!-gandalf,the bridge of khazad dūm |
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06-21-2023, 04:31 PM
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#19 |
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Wight
Join Date: Jun 2023
Location: Treading the Narrow Way
Posts: 198
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I would obey the last command of Gandalf the Grey and "Fly!"
Discretion is often the better part of valour, after all.
__________________
For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. John 3:16 |
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06-21-2023, 06:04 PM
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#20 |
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Blossom of Dwimordene
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: The realm of forgotten words
Posts: 10,401
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*point* They went that way.
__________________
You passed from under darkened dome, you enter now the secret land. - Take me to Finrod's fabled home!... ~ Finrod: The Rock Opera |
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06-22-2023, 07:38 AM
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#21 |
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Overshadowed Eagle
Join Date: Nov 2017
Location: The north-west of the Old World, east of the Sea
Posts: 3,909
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Put on a black cloak (I have one of those!) and join the ranks. It worked for Frodo and Sam, and with a million orcs all in one place it's not like anyone's going to be keeping track.
It would be nice to think I could use that disguise to sneak up on Sauron (who is apparently there in person) and stab him in the back a la Wormtongue, but a) unless my replica Sting is hiding a big secret that wouldn't work and b) I am a klutz. I'd probably just wait until they spread out enough and duck out into cover. Again, it worked for Frodo and Sam. hS
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Have you burned the ships that could bear you back again? ~Finrod: The Rock Opera |
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06-22-2023, 01:10 PM
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#22 |
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Wight
Join Date: Jun 2023
Location: Treading the Narrow Way
Posts: 198
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[http://forum.barrowdowns.com/images/...ron;737204]Put on a black cloak (I have one of those!) and join the ranks. It worked for Frodo and Sam, and with a million orcs all in one place it's not like anyone's going to be keeping track.
It would be nice to think I could use that disguise to sneak up on Sauron (who is apparently there in person) and stab him in the back a la Wormtongue, but a) unless my replica Sting is hiding a big secret that wouldn't work and b) I am a klutz. I'd probably just wait until they spread out enough and duck out into cover. Again, it worked for Frodo and Sam. hS[/QUOTE] Wow. You really thought that through.  I think it is the best plan so far.
__________________
For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. John 3:16 |
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