Easier way?

[Kath]

I wasn't too sure where to put this but after remembering some of the theories I came up with to answer the question I thought I'd better pop it in here.

Basically a few days ago after watching the third film my dad asked me a question:

"Why didn't the eagles just fly Frodo to Mount Doom in the first place?"

I'll leave it to you to give answers whether they be serious or ridiculous (as some of mine were after a while), and if any mods want to move it feel free.

[the guy who be short]

This question has been asked far too often. The "real-life" answer is that it would make the book about 100 pages long. Tolkienites like to make up complex reason relating to Middle Earth, but that's the answer.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

It will be interesting to see if people can come up with more preposterous answers on this topic here on the Mirth forum than they already have in 'serious' discussions on Books! For your enjoyment, here are a few of the previous threads - the first is my personal favourite.

The Great Eagle Mystery
Middle-Earth Air Force
Why didn't Frodo use the eagles...

[Formendacil]

You want a goofy reply, well, I'll give it a shot...

The reason that the Eagles couldn't fly Frodo to Mordor is that the Eagles are actually petroleum-powered aircraft, designed by the Noldor for cruising Valinor. Manwe took a fancy to them, and used them for reconnaissance during the First Age.

However, during the Third Age, due to downsizing, there was only enough room in the Valinorean budget for a few short flights a year- gas prices being what they were. For that reason, Gandalf simply couldn't take the Eagles any farther than Edoras at the time.

This all changed when Gandalf got recalled to Valinor for a promotion. As a white-ranking wizard, he convinced the Valar at their annual January meeting to increase the Eagle portion of the budget by allocating to them the resources that had formerly been spent on the Istari. With Istari staff cut by 80% there was a considerably greater amount of money to spend- enough that the Eagle command could not only afford to join in the military operations on Mordor, but also on a public relations cruise to Minas Tirith.

The only problem was that by the time the Eagles moved out, Frodo was already on his own, and behind enemy lines, and it was too dangerous to go and seek him out. So he had to go to Mt. Doom on his own.

There. It is explained.

[Elendhel]

Originally Posted by the guy who be short

This question has been asked far too often. The "real-life" answer is that it would make the book about 100 pages long. Tolkienites like to make up complex reason relating to Middle Earth, but that's the answer.

IAWTP.

But wasn't Tolkien's reasoning along the line that he objected to the use of the Eagles as some sort of taxi-service?

[Eomer of the Rohirrim]

There were eagles?

[Elendhel]

Originally Posted by Eomer of the Rohirrim

There were eagles?

Haha

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

Actually, they are storks, not eagles. The eagles were wiped out during the War of Wrath when they charged the winged dragons, mistaking them for sparrows--so much for keen eyesight.

Now, because of the confusion during the Dark Years of the Second Age, no record was kept of the extinction of eagles. Therefore, when some mysterious Maia of birth (under which Vala she is remains a mystery) sent her beloved giant storks to deliver babies to the beleaguered cities of Men in the East, people mistook them for eagles. The storks didn't bother to correct them, saying to themselves, "If they be as stupid as to mistake us for anything else but storks, it's their problem."

In due course, they helped the poor people of Middle-earth whenever their busy schedules would let them.

Now, about their flight towards Mordor during the battle before the Black Gate, they were just pushed off-course by strong jet streams when some oaf of a stork weatherman drew the weather charts wrong. Some saw what was happening below them, and decided, "What the Mandos, we're just delivering two babies anyway. Let's just help the poor things."

Of course, if you believe this, I have a piece of Doriath to sell you.

[Eomer of the Rohirrim]

I had always thought that they didn't really exist, but were instead products of the pipeweed-induced hallucinations of Bilbo and Gandalf. And Pippin.

So they could not possibly have carried Frodo to Mount Doom because they simply are not.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

I had always thought that they didn't really exist, but were instead products of the pipeweed-induced hallucinations of Bilbo and Gandalf. And Pippin. (Eomer)

This is an interesting theory. Powerful hallucinogenic compounds have been marketed in Middle-earth ever since the return of the Noldor. There has been much speculation regarding the origin of these mind-altering agents, although I for one believe they came from Eru himself, brought to Arda by the Ainur, and brought to ME by the Noldor.

Which brings to question the entire existence of Eä. Was it made solely by some drug in the punch bowl during the Ainulindalë? Was it all due to Eru's mass hallucination of the Ainur? If it is, then what are we talking about?

Oh, hush. You and your crackpot ideas.

[Lhunardawen]

Thanks a lot, Eomer. Look at what you have unleashed.

[Eomer of the Rohirrim]

If Ea didn't exist then we would not have our copies of The Lord of the Rings. So I am inclined to believe in it. Eagles though, are far more dubious.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

Can't you see it? Eä isn't real! It's the result of the drunkenness of a few unclad spirits. It didn't exist. Please, I'm begging you, let go of the notion that Eä exists. It will only bring you more sorrow.

Oh, boy. He's gone bonkers. Bring out Monsieur Strate Jacquet.

[Meneltarmacil]

The Eagles' contract didn't cover the kind of flying needed to bring Frodo all the way to Mount Doom, just rescue missions when everything was hopeless. Gandalf had already paid Manwe a considerable amount of money to hire the Eagles just for the purpose of rescue missions and didn't want to have to pay any more, and Manwe had some of the best lawyers in all of Arda, so arguing would prove hopeless.

[the guy who be short]

The Eagles had no compasses.

Idiots.

(The Eagles, not you people...)

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

The Eagles are afraid of metals. They developed Middle-earth's first metal detector to scan their passengers.

[wilwarin538]

I personally just think that the Eagles are very lazy.All they ever want to take is short trips.

Or perhaps at the time when they could have helped Frodo get to mount Doom it was Eagle floo season. Now we wouldn't want a bunch of sneezing eagles to carry those little hobbits now would we? I think not.

[Lhunardawen]

The Eagles just happened to be in the mood for sauna. They decided to do something helpful along the way.

[Eomer of the Rohirrim]

The Eagles have split personalities; sometimes they help the good guys and sometimes they don't. It might seem like uneven distribution - after all, we barely hear about them - but that's not because they're more evil than good. It's simply because they spend so much time at the doctor's.