What do you assign to Mordor?

[Kath]

Feeling guilty. I hate it! Especially when there really isn't much you can do to stop yourself feeling it.

[Feanor of the Peredhil]

I assign feeling left out last night do to my lovingly obsessive distaste for personal use of the phrase "I seen"... Dialectical difference is a knife that cuts both ways, for those of you discussing slang right now.

[Firefoot]

Hot, muggy, disgusting days just after it rains.

[Mithalwen]

Vertigo... mine is sporadic and triggered by onlt certain "high up" situations (like when I feel I have nothing in front of me). Unfortunately the lower flight of stairs from where I work since we had the office change around has not only open steps but no supporting wall and very open rails. I was coping alone but now the receptionists have twigged that I often pause, gulp and grip onto both rails if possible before descending carefully and feel the need to "talk me down" which is really sweet but does make me more self conscious which is less helpful. At least it isn't as bad as when I thought I would have to spend the rest of my life up the amphitheatre in Verona. I was fine going up and looking out over the city with a nice solid wall in front of me ..then I turned around...

[Firefoot]

I would be surprised if this hadn't already been assinged but it deserves re-assignation:

Tetanus shots. And other shots. And in both shoulders at the same time...

[Feanor of the Peredhil]

Imagine my enthusiasm at the prospect of three casual after-hours meetings wherein I listen to published authors read their works, discuss literature and writing with a bunch of writers, and enjoy live music.

Now picture how happy I was discovering that two of the three nights will take place in bars into which I will not be able to get because I'm only 18 and I'm not willing to carry a fake ID. Unfair.

[Kath]

Perhaps Fea you should assign those stringent rules in the USA. Being only 18 isn't a problem here.

[Celuien]

Garbage trucks beeping and crashing outside the window three times a week...at 2 in the morning.

'Renovations' in the dorm that mean I'll have to change rooms twice in four weeks. I was here last time this place had renovations. Couldn't tell what they did afterward. I doubt they'll make any difference this time either. But maybe I'll be lucky enough to at least be moved to a room that isn't over the alley with the dumpsters.

[MatthewM]

What do I assign to Mordor? Many things, and only some will find their ways on this list.

1) People who do not SIGNAL before turning. MORONS.
2) Trucks that are slow and on the highway. Trucks that drop things from their dirty haul.
3) 75-80+ year old people driving. Give it up, it has now become dangerous.
4) Drugs.
5) Gasoline prices.
6) Bush's Middle-Eastern thirst for blood.
7) Drinking age 21+.

[Celuien]

I suppose this is more of a 'wicked pleasure' than something for Shire assignment.

Finding the most incredibly unhealthy but tasty dinner at the hospital cafeteria last night. Six hot and spicy chicken wings with a plate of spicy curly fries and Diet Coke.

The soda was probably the healthiest part of dinner...other than the half-piece of corn on the cob.

[JennyHallu]

Power outages. And thunderstorms that pop up out of nowhere when you're trying to go swimming.

[the guy who be short]

4) Drugs.

Please stay away from my local hospital.

As for me, I shall send growing up. A child forever... a teen in fact. That would be perfect.

[littlemanpoet]

I assign old wounds reopened, and people who actually like each other aplenty, managing to hurt each other over and over again.

Oh, and while I'm at it, I assign Big Oil Companies that use all kinds of fibbish reasons for raising prices. Mid-East tensions, my foot; sure, they're there, but you're just raising the prices because you're greedy! Admit it! Not that we in the U.S. don't deserve to pay as much as our friends across the Water, but at least the BOCs could be honest about it. Yeah, I know, who am I kidding? So that's why they belong in Mordor. Right, SPM?

[The Saucepan Man]

Originally Posted by lmp

Oh, and while I'm at it, I assign Big Oil Companies that use all kinds of fibbish reasons for raising prices. Mid-East tensions, my foot; sure, they're there, but you're just raising the prices because you're greedy! Admit it! Not that we in the U.S. don't deserve to pay as much as our friends across the Water, but at least the BOCs could be honest about it. Yeah, I know, who am I kidding? So that's why they belong in Mordor. Right, SPM?

Actually, in the UK at least, the BOCs do not make a significant profit from petrol stations. The larger part of their profit comes from their wider commercial activities. So, the price of petrol is largely dictated by world oil prices plus government-imposed taxes. The latter is the reason for the traditionally higher prices this side of the ocean and may, I suspect, be the reason for the recent price hike in the US.

But inequitable taxes have (I think) already been dispatched to Mordor ...

[Celuien]

Originally Posted by lmp

Mid-East tensions

Since you mentioned it, I'll assign Mideast tensions...

[Feanor of the Peredhil]

Bats!

Understand that my house is at least two hundred years old. Bats in the attic are no new occurence. But three bats getting into the main house in the past two days has taught me a very valuable lesson about myself: I'm terrified of them.

[The Saucepan Man]

Originally Posted by Fea

Bats!

Oh, we have bats in the attic of our new house. It's a new experience for me and I rather like it. In fact, on the whole, I rather like the whole "being closer to nature" thing that moving out from the city entails.

There are, however, certain consequent developments worthy of consignment to Mordor, viz:

A murder of crows, which has recently taken up residence in our garden and is systematically seeking to drive off all other bird life.

The increased prevalence of insects and arachnids, all keen to gain entry through the windows left open due to the incredibly hot weather (especially at night, when the lights are on inside ... ).

The alarming multiplication of wasps nests in the brick-work of our house. We've already had the exterminator round to deal with one, and now his services are required for a further two (and probably others as yet undiscovered).

(Apologies to all those who hold to the belief that all life is sacred. I generally agree, but draw the line at wasps and mosquitos. )

[Feanor of the Peredhil]

Originally Posted by The Saucepan Man

(Apologies to all those who hold to the belief that all life is sacred. I generally agree, but draw the line at wasps and mosquitos. )

Ah, that would be me. Begging, through the closed and locked doors behind which I am frozen and shaking in terror, that my big brothers remove the bats without killing them.

[Lalwendë]

I love bats! Its illegal to do anything to harm them in the UK, and that includes 'disturbing' their roosts, so no noisy music in a house with bats then.

I'm assigning this hot weather to Mordor. I much prefer cold weather, and I hate having to be at work when its like this as I just feel listless and ill. I've had a pounding headache all evening and don't feel very well at all. Time for a raindance!

[Kath]

My recent strange aversion to hugs.

[Child of the 7th Age]

AC that breaks down when your temperature is in the high 90's!

[Firefoot]

Having to work late shifts and then not being able to sleep afterwards... it's one in the morning now (and maybe some of you are night owls, but that's inordinately late... early... for me), and my mind is so busy. Just... want... sleep...

[Encaitare]

People who flame your work on Fanfiction.net/FictionPress.com are certainly Mordor-worthy. I'd assign them to the Shire because they amuse me, but I don't want to disturb the peace of the Shire with that sort of people.

EDIT: Nope. They can go to Mordor and stay there.

[Orominuialwen]

Originally Posted by The Saucepan Man

The increased prevalence of insects and arachnids, all keen to gain entry through the windows left open due to the incredibly hot weather (especially at night, when the lights are on inside ... ).

Do you not have screen? I remember there being none when I went to England several years ago, but I wasn't sure if that was just a peculiarity of the house I was staying in or if it was a common occurance in the country.

I assign mosquitoes and whatever biting insects have been conspiring to devour me while I'm here in Florida. I'm tired of itching!

And getting saltwater up my nose while swimming in the Gulf can go to Mordor too. I used to think there was nothing worse to get up your nose than lake water (wait, I take that back, when I inhaled a piece of bratwurst due to laughing while eating, that was way worse than lake water), but I was wrong.

[Kath]

No we don't have screens. Since our summer season is generally rather short we don't bother with them. Might be an idea to start though!

I assign being hungry, but having no idea what you want to eat.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Originally Posted by Kath

I assign being hungry, but having no idea what you want to eat.

I second that! I feel like that 80% of the time I am awake. . . Like that --->

[Lalaith]

I'm with Lalwende on sending insane heatwaves to Mordor.
Although they are accompanied by a wicked pleassure assignment...
....all the handsome young Polish builders working round my neighbourhood have had to take their shirts off this week.

[Lhunardawen]

Originally Posted by Kath

I assign being hungry, but having no idea what you want to eat.

Thirded.

Also, I assign tough crowds. Not the people themselves, mind - I'm not that misanthropic.

[Mithalwen]

Paying over £8 for superior a cinema seat but still having to park your feet in the aisle or hang legs over (vacant!) seat in front due to lack of legroom...

[Kath]

Having to go to the dentist when you have an ever increasing phobia of the place.

[Lalwendë]

Originally Posted by Orominuialwen

Do you not have screen? I remember there being none when I went to England several years ago, but I wasn't sure if that was just a peculiarity of the house I was staying in or if it was a common occurance in the country.

I don't need screens, I have cats! They greedily hunt down and eat any unfortunate bug that gets into the house.

I'm assigning the carbon monoxide monitor that went off this morning at home which saw me ringing first Transco (the gas national grid) and then British Gas to look at the boiler (which was very expensive and I've only just finished paying for after 4 years). Thankfully there was nothing wrong. But I've had to sit home in sweltering heat as they had to turn the central heating on full to test the system! Its taken hours for the house to cool down to merely boiling temperature.

Originally Posted by Kath

Having to go to the dentist when you have an ever increasing phobia of the place.

I conquered my dentist fears by having very bad toothache and I realised that going to the dentist actually helped me to avoid the very worst pain imaginable! He now has to get the dental books out sometimes to show me pictures of different procedures due to my pestering, but its a two way thing as apparently he looks forward to doing my teeth as they are 'interesting' due to the triple roots!

[Kath]

Thanks for trying Lalwendë but I've been to the dentist with toothache, and they've cured me, and it still hasn't helped the phobia

I'll assign this heat though. Mum just took the fan away so I've realised how hot it really is! I may be sleeping in the cellar tonight.

[Lhunardawen]

I assign whistles. Not policeman whistles, not kettle whistles...those whistles that are conjured by mischievous lips with cells bearing Y-chromosomes owned by human beings who really need to get a life.

[JennyHallu]

Oh, I like those, Lhuna. Lets me know I'm doing something right.


I assign Saturday's catastrophic air conditioning leak. It has destroyed either my cable modem or my router. Not sure which. But I have no internet at home until we figure it out and repair it.

[the guy who be short]

I assign being unable to whistle!

In fact I assign my tongue. Don't worry, that's not a photo (), it's a description of the stupid disorder I have that leaves me unable to whistle, french kiss, lick my lips, or pronounce the "th" or "sts" sound.

Edit: I thought you would like to know, I also can't stick my tongue out at people or lick ice cream...

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

I assign not beeing able to estimate peoples ages.

It is simply annoying!

[Kath]

The smell of hospitals. It makes me feel sick every time.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Universitys which does not accept you !

[Formendacil]

Hands which are cut open and really slow down your typing... This paltry post not only is taking forever, it hurts to use the wrong buttons...

[Firefoot]

Flat tires. I leave on vacation (not in my car) and when I got home the tire was flat. And wouldn't you know it... on the very day that the three months was up after which I can drive other minors around.