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06-24-2008, 10:21 PM
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#12961 |
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Curmudgeonly Wordwraith
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Ensconced in curmudgeonly pursuits
Posts: 2,509
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Gimli: Cap'n I'm givin' her all she's got, but the ship's tractor beam is pullin' me inta space!"
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And your little sister's immaculate virginity wings away on the bony shoulders of a young horse named George who stole surreptitiously into her geography revision. |
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06-24-2008, 10:25 PM
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#12962 | |
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Drummer in the Deep
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Next Sunday A.D.
Posts: 2,145
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Quote:
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But all the while I sit and think of times there were before
I listen for returning feet and voices at the door |
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06-25-2008, 11:21 AM
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#12963 |
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Maundering Mage
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Texas
Posts: 4,648
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Realizing the gravity of the situation Boromir did his best to concentrate at the task at hand, but it was to no avail. He couldn't shake the feeling that the gastro-intestinal problem he developed while in Rivendell would rear it's ugly head at this most inopportune moment.
or Gimli: That still only counts as one...oh wait that's later that I say that.
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“I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo. "So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.” |
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06-25-2008, 12:51 PM
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#12964 |
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Pilgrim Soul
Join Date: May 2004
Location: watching the wonga-wonga birds circle...
Posts: 9,458
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Boromir has that shrinking feeling...
It is a little known fact that "Boromir the Tall" was an ironic nickname. The man of Gondor was actually scarcely taller than Gimli ......
or While Gimli was Gandalf's favourite during the journey through Moria, it seemed that the sun really did shine out of his......
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“But Finrod walks with Finarfin his father beneath the trees in Eldamar.”
Christopher Tolkien, Requiescat in pace |
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07-04-2008, 09:47 AM
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#12965 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Time for something new...
 Treebeard was furious that, despite Saruman's assurances, the earrings weren't very stylish. OR Quickbeam was about to become the world's first folk singing ent! 
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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07-04-2008, 11:19 AM
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#12966 | |
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Odinic Wanderer
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Under the Raven banner, between tall Odin and white Christ!
Posts: 3,845
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I looked at the picture and thought of two caption, unfortunately I continued reading and found out that they where very close to hookbills. . .
"Merry and Pippin is getting tought some new drinking songs" and "Treebeards new "bling bling" was the envy of the other ents" The jokes aren't the same, but the general theme is! Anyways I shall come up with some new ones. ------------------------------------------ Merry and Pippin was suprised about just how pleasant it was getting limbs eaten by an ent. Merry and Pippin was too polite to tell Treebeard that his beard was so sticky and quilted that they where helplessly stuck.
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07-08-2008, 08:27 PM
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#12967 |
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Scion of The Faithful
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: The brink, where hope and despair are akin. [The Philippines]
Posts: 5,312
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This pic . . .
. . . takes the expression 'chip off the old block' to a new level.
I mean, look at the hair, man.
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フェンリス鴨 (Fenrisu Kamo) The plot, cut, defeated. I intend to copy this sig forever - so far so good...
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07-08-2008, 10:00 PM
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#12968 |
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Drummer in the Deep
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Next Sunday A.D.
Posts: 2,145
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Treebeard: I'm a lumberjack and I'm okay!
Ents: He's a lumberjack and...what?
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But all the while I sit and think of times there were before
I listen for returning feet and voices at the door |
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07-11-2008, 08:24 AM
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#12969 |
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Auspicious Wraith
Join Date: May 2002
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 4,859
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Merry and Pippin were about to experience the strangest Diana Ross & The Supremes tribute act in any world.
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Los Ingobernables de Harlond |
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07-11-2008, 01:01 PM
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#12970 |
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Pilgrim Soul
Join Date: May 2004
Location: watching the wonga-wonga birds circle...
Posts: 9,458
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Fifty years on Bill and Ben were much as they ever had been but time had taken a terrible toll on the Little Weed.
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“But Finrod walks with Finarfin his father beneath the trees in Eldamar.”
Christopher Tolkien, Requiescat in pace |
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07-11-2008, 01:06 PM
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#12971 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Treebeard still couldn't work out where the voices in his head were coming from.
OR Quickbeam was highly amused that Treebeard was still sporting an Afro.
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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07-11-2008, 01:57 PM
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#12972 |
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Maundering Mage
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Texas
Posts: 4,648
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Treebeard: And swing your partner dosie-doe...
or Pippin couldn't help himself, ent draught just gave him a terrible case of gas.
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“I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo. "So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.” |
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07-15-2008, 12:48 AM
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#12973 |
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Auspicious Wraith
Join Date: May 2002
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 4,859
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I don't get this one.
 But, regardless of the picture, one can always fit in a common theme. Say... Gandalf's uncloakings were attracting new audiences every week. 
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Los Ingobernables de Harlond |
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07-16-2008, 02:52 AM
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#12974 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Trebeard: Isenguard!
Hobbits: Isenguard! Quickbeam: Isenguard! Ent: It's only a model. Treebeard: Shh!!
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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07-16-2008, 03:35 AM
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#12975 |
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Delver in the Deep
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Aotearoa
Posts: 960
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The Ents Strike
"What do we want?"
"No orcs!" "When do we want it?" "NOW!"
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But Gwindor answered: 'The doom lies in yourself, not in your name'. |
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07-16-2008, 05:05 AM
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#12976 |
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Scion of The Faithful
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: The brink, where hope and despair are akin. [The Philippines]
Posts: 5,312
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Premonitions.
Treebeard: Oh, look, new pic!
Quickbeam: This should be fun.  This is Sam after seeing Gandalf uncloak. ~*~ or ~*~ This is Sam after seeing Mt. Zoom go by.
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フェンリス鴨 (Fenrisu Kamo) The plot, cut, defeated. I intend to copy this sig forever - so far so good...
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07-16-2008, 05:12 AM
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#12977 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Sam realised that he left his trousers at home...
OR Gandlaf removes his beard to wipe his chin sweat away...
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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07-16-2008, 05:30 AM
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#12978 |
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Scion of The Faithful
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: The brink, where hope and despair are akin. [The Philippines]
Posts: 5,312
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Sam: Mr Strider sir, I spent two lifetimes in the Wild. Now do I look like you?
Aragorn: . . .
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フェンリス鴨 (Fenrisu Kamo) The plot, cut, defeated. I intend to copy this sig forever - so far so good...
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07-16-2008, 06:22 AM
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#12979 |
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Auspicious Wraith
Join Date: May 2002
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 4,859
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Deleted scene: Sam is caught trying to strangle Frodo and steal the Ring.
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Los Ingobernables de Harlond |
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07-16-2008, 11:00 AM
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#12980 |
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Shady She-Penguin
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: In a far land beyond the Sea
Posts: 8,093
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Sam: "The mushrooms were excellent, Mrs Maggot..."
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Like the stars chase the sun, over the glowing hill I will conquer Blood is running deep, some things never sleep Double Fenris
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07-16-2008, 11:03 AM
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#12981 | |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Quote:
__________________
I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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07-16-2008, 11:53 AM
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#12982 |
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Scion of The Faithful
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: The brink, where hope and despair are akin. [The Philippines]
Posts: 5,312
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Impossible things? Or not?
Sam (drunkenly): Oh, look. It'sh a flying Balrog.
Frodo: Don't be silly, Balrogs don't have wings. Gollum: And even if they did, they couldn't fly, no they couldn't precious. Sam: Okay then, who'sh that? Tom Bombadil on a hang-glider? Nonsensical singing heard. Sam: . . . Okay, could be Elvesh. Eru knowsh they have thoshe horrible shongsh.
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フェンリス鴨 (Fenrisu Kamo) The plot, cut, defeated. I intend to copy this sig forever - so far so good...
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07-16-2008, 09:12 PM
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#12983 | |
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Odinic Wanderer
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Under the Raven banner, between tall Odin and white Christ!
Posts: 3,845
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Sam stares in disbelife as Cliff Richards and Tony Blair plays a game of twister
or Quite suprisingly Sam's own hair tried to poke out his eyes or This is how Sam looked seconds before he was defeated by the Jigsaw Puzzle of Doom!
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07-17-2008, 09:59 AM
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#12984 |
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Auspicious Wraith
Join Date: May 2002
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 4,859
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In Cirith Ungol
''Begging your pardon, Mr Frodo, but they haven't got the Ring.''
''What do you mean? Did you take it?'' ''Mmmm... yeah...'' ''That's great! So we can sneak out and go to Mount Doom now!'' ''Well, no, y'see Mr Frodo, I traded them for .... some seeds. They totally work, look: I already grew some cress with them.'' ''You traded the Ring for a basic vegetable?'' ''Um, yeah.'' ''Well, I am really hungry--'' ''Look out! They have a cave troll!"
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Los Ingobernables de Harlond |
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07-17-2008, 10:27 AM
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#12985 |
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Child of the West
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Watching President Fillmore ride a unicorn
Posts: 2,132
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Sam stumbles upon Elrond trying on his old clothes from The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert.
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"Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry." - Mark Twain |
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07-17-2008, 12:09 PM
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#12986 |
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Maundering Mage
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Texas
Posts: 4,648
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Frodo: So I've been thinking about it Sam, why didn't they just mount us up on some eagles and then fly over?
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“I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo. "So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.” |
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07-24-2008, 05:10 AM
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#12987 |
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Auspicious Wraith
Join Date: May 2002
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 4,859
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Sam is glad of the Orcs' intervention: perhaps no-one will notice that his trousers fell down.
Edit: just noticed Hookbill made that joke. Ok, er, how about:Sam is caught trying on Galadriel's dress.
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Los Ingobernables de Harlond |
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07-24-2008, 07:19 AM
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#12988 |
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Scion of The Faithful
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: The brink, where hope and despair are akin. [The Philippines]
Posts: 5,312
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Memorable posts.
Sam: Gimli was a WHAT?!
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フェンリス鴨 (Fenrisu Kamo) The plot, cut, defeated. I intend to copy this sig forever - so far so good...
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08-02-2008, 01:35 PM
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#12989 |
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Pilgrim Soul
Join Date: May 2004
Location: watching the wonga-wonga birds circle...
Posts: 9,458
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As the Edinburgh festival gets under way...
Grima's routine doesn't go down as well as he had hoped...
 Alternative comedy? Alternative Comedy? You call a flour bomb alternative comedy?
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“But Finrod walks with Finarfin his father beneath the trees in Eldamar.”
Christopher Tolkien, Requiescat in pace |
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08-02-2008, 02:09 PM
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#12990 | |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Quote:
__________________
I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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08-02-2008, 06:00 PM
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#12991 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Facing the world's troubles with Christ's hope!
Posts: 1,635
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Gandalf does the macarena after Hookbill gets speared.
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I heard the bells on Christmas Day. Their old, familiar carols play. And wild and sweet the words repeatof peace on earth, good-will to men! ~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow Last edited by Groin Redbeard; 08-02-2008 at 07:20 PM. |
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08-03-2008, 05:42 AM
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#12992 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Muddy-earth
Posts: 1,297
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Grima tortures Theoden by tying him to a chair and forcing him to watch Big Brother continuously.
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[B]THE LORD OF THE GRINS:THE ONE PARODY....A PARODY BETTER THAN THE RINGS OF POWER. |
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08-03-2008, 06:14 AM
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#12993 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Grima looks on as the horse hair on Eomer's helm begins to grow and grow.
Theoden: Not again! OR Grima: Is Eowyn kicking that Dwarf for a reason? Theoden: Just... Just let it go... 
__________________
I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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08-03-2008, 01:36 PM
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#12994 |
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Mighty Quill
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Walking off to look for America
Posts: 2,230
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Grima: (Looks around cautiously) Did you hear the one about...
Theoden: Not another one...
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The Party Doesn't Start Until You're Dead.
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08-03-2008, 02:02 PM
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#12995 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Facing the world's troubles with Christ's hope!
Posts: 1,635
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Grima: My lord, Gandalf is staring at us, and he doesn't look happy.
Theoden: Zzzzzz
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I heard the bells on Christmas Day. Their old, familiar carols play. And wild and sweet the words repeatof peace on earth, good-will to men! ~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow |
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08-03-2008, 04:19 PM
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#12996 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Facing the world's troubles with Christ's hope!
Posts: 1,635
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I just remembered one! Here's one for you Hookbill.
 Hamma: Announcing the arrival of John Fillis!
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I heard the bells on Christmas Day. Their old, familiar carols play. And wild and sweet the words repeatof peace on earth, good-will to men! ~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow |
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08-03-2008, 04:41 PM
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#12997 | |
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Mighty Quill
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Walking off to look for America
Posts: 2,230
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Quote:
Theoden: Who is John Fillis? Grima: Your guess is as good as mine...
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The Party Doesn't Start Until You're Dead.
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08-03-2008, 11:44 PM
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#12998 |
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Scion of The Faithful
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: The brink, where hope and despair are akin. [The Philippines]
Posts: 5,312
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Gríma who?
Théoden: Severus, I need my Wolfsbane Pot--AWOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
__________________
フェンリス鴨 (Fenrisu Kamo) The plot, cut, defeated. I intend to copy this sig forever - so far so good...
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08-04-2008, 01:10 PM
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#12999 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Theoden's sick horse gets into the throne room... AGAIN!
__________________
I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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08-04-2008, 02:53 PM
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#13000 |
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Auspicious Wraith
Join Date: May 2002
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 4,859
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Grima was furious: he had ordered the mummy, not the zombie.
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Los Ingobernables de Harlond |
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