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03-27-2006, 07:42 PM
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#10161 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: May 2003
Location: The Party Tree
Posts: 1,042
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Aahh!! It burns!!
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Holby is an actual flesh-and-blood person, right? Not, say a sock-puppet of Nilp’s, by any chance? ~Nerwen, WWCIII |
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03-27-2006, 09:11 PM
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#10162 |
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Drummer in the Deep
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Next Sunday A.D.
Posts: 2,145
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Sort of inspired by Morsul's inspiration from Hookbill's post...
Pippin: This is an ex-Merry!!
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But all the while I sit and think of times there were before
I listen for returning feet and voices at the door |
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03-27-2006, 11:49 PM
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#10163 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Pippin: Aragorn! You know that elf you were going to marry but weren't sure you wanted to stop her from losing her immortality?
Aragorn *off screen*: yes? Pippin: Well, you don't have to worry about her anymore. Mr. Olyphant has... well... you know...
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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03-28-2006, 12:02 AM
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#10164 |
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Wight
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: the Cottage of Lost Play
Posts: 182
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No one was more shocked than Merry and Pippin when Frodo slipped on the wrong ring, and instead of turning invisible, turned into a dead oliphaunt.
------ "Oh no!!! The Oliphaunt crushed my Barbie Dreamhouse!!!" ------ Merry was so excited that Fido learned how to play dead, that he glued himself to Pippin. He immediately wished he had found some other way to express his joy.
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"Come away! Let the cowards keep this city!" -- Fëanor to the Noldor |
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03-28-2006, 09:25 AM
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#10165 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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The Olyphant ate Aragorn! But it died of food poisoning. Pippin was dismayed as Aragorn cut his way out to return, smellier than ever.
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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03-28-2006, 09:51 AM
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#10166 |
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Drummer in the Deep
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Next Sunday A.D.
Posts: 2,145
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Planes, Trains and Oliphaunts
M: Pippin, hy are you kissing my ear?
P: Why are you holding my hand? M: Where's your other hand? P: Between two pillows. M: Those aren't pillows!! Both: AAAARRRGH!
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But all the while I sit and think of times there were before
I listen for returning feet and voices at the door |
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03-28-2006, 01:24 PM
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#10167 |
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Pilgrim Soul
Join Date: May 2004
Location: watching the wonga-wonga birds circle...
Posts: 9,458
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Merry: Pippin, this isn't an opera - I'm injured, when someone is injured you get help... you don't sing a de capo aria while they die...
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“But Finrod walks with Finarfin his father beneath the trees in Eldamar.”
Christopher Tolkien, Requiescat in pace |
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03-28-2006, 03:03 PM
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#10168 |
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Raffish Rapscallion
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Far from the 'Downs, it seems :-(
Posts: 2,835
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Pippin: "Ahg! What is that behind us Merry!?"
Merry: "Don't worry Pip, it's just a blue (or green) screen." |
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03-28-2006, 06:59 PM
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#10169 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: As with the flygja
Posts: 1,403
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Merry tried in vain to tell if Pippin had died from sheer shock, but he couldn't for the life of him find Pippin's heart in his throat...
~ Aesthete
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Vinur, vinur skilur tú meg? Veitst tú ongan loyniveg? Hevur tú reikað líka sum eg, í endaleysu tokuni? |
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03-28-2006, 09:09 PM
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#10170 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Virginia.
Posts: 952
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Merry didn't like having his picture taken.
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Fenris Wolf: WW LXXX. |
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03-28-2006, 11:42 PM
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#10171 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Pippin: Wow! That Olyphant was scary... But what is THAT?
Merry: Oh calm down! It's just a new picture...  It seems that the Eye of Sauron was putting on too much weight. Sauron: Uuurrr... I knew that last muffin was a mistake... OR Ah, slave labour; you get what you pay for.
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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03-28-2006, 11:46 PM
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#10172 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: In hospitals, call rooms and (rarely) my apartment.
Posts: 1,538
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Sauron's morning workout
Sauron: You do the hokey-pokey and you turn yourself around... and that's what it's all about
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I prepared Explosive Runes this morning. |
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03-29-2006, 12:31 AM
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#10173 |
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Sword of Spirit
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Oh, I'm around.
Posts: 1,401
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The leaning tower of Barad-dur.
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I'm on a Mission from God. |
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03-29-2006, 12:47 AM
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#10174 |
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Shade of Carn Dûm
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Pandora's box... "LET ME OUT OF HERE!"
Posts: 344
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"Are your eyes dry and irritated? Are they red and puffy? Then you need Clear Eyes It'll clear your eyes up in a jiffy."
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And when this life is over... and I stand before the God... I'll dream I'm back here standing in my nowhere land of Oz..... |
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03-29-2006, 03:19 AM
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#10175 |
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Mischievous Candle
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: So near to Russia, so far from Japan, quite a long way from Cairo, lots of miles from Vietnam.
Posts: 1,234
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The termite problem in Barad-dûr got really bad.
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Fenris Wolf
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03-29-2006, 04:03 AM
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#10176 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Sauron's punishment for breaking the No Smoking rule. He couldn't help it, being a ball of fire.
OR Sauron: Those Orcs are literally eating me out of house and home!
__________________
I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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03-29-2006, 05:21 AM
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#10177 |
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Wight
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: In crazy captions waving an angry fist at the outside world
Posts: 155
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Sauron: "I am all powerf-arrrrrgggghhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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03-29-2006, 05:59 AM
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#10178 |
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Pilgrim Soul
Join Date: May 2004
Location: watching the wonga-wonga birds circle...
Posts: 9,458
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Sauron never really got the hang of the barbecue...but would he give up and use the perfectly good grill in the kitchens of Barad Dur? No ..... of course not... he might be a Maia .. but he was a male Maia...
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“But Finrod walks with Finarfin his father beneath the trees in Eldamar.”
Christopher Tolkien, Requiescat in pace |
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03-29-2006, 06:44 AM
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#10179 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: May 2003
Location: The Party Tree
Posts: 1,042
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*slaps forehead* ooh, I didn't upgrade to earthquake protection.
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Holby is an actual flesh-and-blood person, right? Not, say a sock-puppet of Nilp’s, by any chance? ~Nerwen, WWCIII |
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03-29-2006, 08:23 AM
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#10180 |
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Denethor's True Love
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Mirkwood. With Thranduil... *swoon*
Posts: 2,049
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Whoever said a chocolate tower would be better than a stone tower was clearly mistaken.
Which leads to... "Aaaaggh! I'm meltiiiiiing!"
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'The Hobbit' 1st impressions: 1. Thorin is hot... Oh god, I fancy a dwarf. 2. Thranduil is hotter. 3. Is that... Figwit! 4. Does Elijah Wood never age? 2nd: It's all about Fili & Kili, really. 3rd: BARD! OMG, Bard. |
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03-29-2006, 08:38 AM
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#10181 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Some Mordor Maths...
1 Drunk Witch King + 1 Mount Zoom = Smash! OR Sauron: Noo! I didn't pay the insurance on the tower!
__________________
I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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03-29-2006, 08:57 AM
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#10182 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 3,448
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To everyone's amazement this tower was alive and loved to dance to the macrena
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Morsul the Resurrected |
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03-29-2006, 10:12 AM
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#10183 |
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Everlasting Whiteness
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Perusing the laminated book of dreams
Posts: 4,533
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Going off Morsul
In the dance-off Sauron found Boromir's moves were too much for him to handle.
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“If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.” |
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03-29-2006, 10:14 AM
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#10184 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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This is what happens is you leave the iron on.
__________________
I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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03-29-2006, 10:17 AM
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#10185 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 3,448
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YOu know that story about pking your eye out with scissors? its true
 or Sauron- o look a penny.....darn my no arms
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Morsul the Resurrected |
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03-29-2006, 10:20 AM
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#10186 | |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Quote:
Sauron really suffered when he had an itch!
__________________
I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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03-29-2006, 05:12 PM
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#10187 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Muddy-earth
Posts: 1,297
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Eye'm on fire today
When Sauron found out that someone had destroyed his precious ring, he looked a bit down and said: What is the point of that'
or Eye'm popping out for a bit.
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[B]THE LORD OF THE GRINS:THE ONE PARODY....A PARODY BETTER THAN THE RINGS OF POWER. |
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03-29-2006, 08:45 PM
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#10188 |
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Raffish Rapscallion
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Far from the 'Downs, it seems :-(
Posts: 2,835
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The Gondorians revealed themselves as the bad punsters that they were by handing out complementary bottles of eyedrops on the day that Sauron fell because, after all...the Eye had dropped.
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03-29-2006, 11:44 PM
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#10189 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Sauron's balancing act didn't last very long.
OR You knew it was coming! Necromancer, Dark Lord, Evil King, whatever your title, it won't save you from the horror of Gandalf the grey uncloaked!
__________________
I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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03-30-2006, 12:07 AM
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#10190 |
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Sword of Spirit
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Oh, I'm around.
Posts: 1,401
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Stealing from Nilp again...
Flint: 2 silver
Fuses: 8 silver Blasting powder: 37 silver Having the satisfaction of single-handedly causing the destruction of the tower of Barad-Dur: Priceless There are some things money can't buy; for everything else, there's MallornCard.
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I'm on a Mission from God. |
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03-30-2006, 03:50 AM
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#10191 |
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Mischievous Candle
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: So near to Russia, so far from Japan, quite a long way from Cairo, lots of miles from Vietnam.
Posts: 1,234
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The disadvantages of being a giant lidless eye kicked in during pollen season...
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Fenris Wolf
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03-30-2006, 03:52 AM
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#10192 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Sauron: I can see my house from heeeeeeeerrrrrreeeee... *splat*
OR Sauron: I could have had the dark cottage of Barad-dûr, that wouldn't have been such a bad fall... But NOOO! I had to go with the fancy tower.
__________________
I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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03-30-2006, 07:51 AM
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#10193 |
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Auspicious Wraith
Join Date: May 2002
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 4,859
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Sauron leans over to chat to the cute little palace next-door.
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Los Ingobernables de Harlond |
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03-30-2006, 07:54 AM
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#10194 |
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Maundering Mage
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Texas
Posts: 4,648
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This new post-modern architecture just didn't seem to hold up under pressure as well as the neo-classical style.
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“I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo. "So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.” |
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03-30-2006, 08:45 AM
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#10195 |
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Sword of Spirit
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Oh, I'm around.
Posts: 1,401
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Despite being a very powerful flaming eye, Sauron was no match for the giant saber-toothed worms that sometimes haunted the plains of Gorgoroth.
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I'm on a Mission from God. Last edited by Gurthang; 03-30-2006 at 02:36 PM. |
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03-30-2006, 09:01 AM
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#10196 |
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Raffish Rapscallion
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Far from the 'Downs, it seems :-(
Posts: 2,835
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Sauron: "Okay, this is the last time I let the Gondorians build my tower, no matter how helpful they appear to be."
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03-30-2006, 06:30 PM
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#10197 |
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Shadow of the Past
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Minas Mor-go
Posts: 1,007
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Sauron always regretted trying to crane his neck to get a better view of those eagles.
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03-30-2006, 10:40 PM
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#10198 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: As with the flygja
Posts: 1,403
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Just as Sauron's new Tower of Evil Cubism was nearly complete, Picasso fell into another blue period...
~ Aesthete
__________________
Vinur, vinur skilur tú meg? Veitst tú ongan loyniveg? Hevur tú reikað líka sum eg, í endaleysu tokuni? |
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03-30-2006, 11:53 PM
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#10199 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Sauron: Aaahh... I'm so bad at this...
OR Sauron: I did it... MY WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY *Splat*
__________________
I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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03-31-2006, 12:31 AM
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#10200 |
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Shade of Carn Dûm
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Pandora's box... "LET ME OUT OF HERE!"
Posts: 344
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All the orcs gathered around the tower:
Orcs (in unison): Ring around the tower, our pockets full of bread.... ASHES Ashes..... The eye falls down.... Sauron: Darn kids....... ~~~~~~~~~~~OR~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Frodo and Sam playing hide-n-go-seek...... Sam hides behind the "large stack of rocks" Sam: Ok Frodo come find me..... Frodo forgot to put on his glasses and runs into the tower...... Sauron: Who did that??? Frodo points at Sam: The old lady did it!!!!!
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And when this life is over... and I stand before the God... I'll dream I'm back here standing in my nowhere land of Oz..... Last edited by Witch_Queen; 03-31-2006 at 12:34 AM. |
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