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Old 02-11-2006, 11:16 PM   #9561
Nilpaurion Felagund
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1420! Two for the price of one!

Legolas: Where is the train to Hogwarts?

Gimli: I think it's not here.

Legolas: STUPID MAPQUEST!
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Old 02-12-2006, 12:11 AM   #9562
THE Ka
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Memoirs of a Elven hairdresser...

Legolas face became disgruntled as a storm cloud was quickly approaching. The cold and warm air pressure systems would be creating even more humidity and the likeliness that his perm would make it through the night was utterly depressing. His entire day had been ruined...

~ Aesthete
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ķ endaleysu tokuni?

Last edited by THE Ka; 02-12-2006 at 12:12 AM. Reason: D'Accord! 900th post!
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Old 02-12-2006, 01:07 AM   #9563
Farael
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Farael has just left Hobbiton.
Gimli tries to pull a prank on Legolas yet after months of traveling without a shower, his body smell gives him away
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Old 02-12-2006, 07:21 AM   #9564
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Legolas can only stare in amazement, as Treebeard starts break-dancing.

OR

Legolas: Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?

Gimli: What? Sweaty and sticky with screaming kids running around and throwing sand at each other?
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Old 02-12-2006, 08:12 AM   #9565
narfforc
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Legolas invents Middle-Earths first Elven-Bow seat belt
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Old 02-12-2006, 12:05 PM   #9566
dancing spawn of ungoliant
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A simple game that had kept the two amused since Helm's Deep:

Legolas: You have to press a little harder or I can't feel it. Umm, is it... a house? A flower?

Gimli: A circle...




edit: My 1000th post.
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Old 02-12-2006, 09:50 PM   #9567
Oddwen
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Oddwen is a guest of Elrond in Rivendell.Oddwen is a guest of Elrond in Rivendell.Oddwen is a guest of Elrond in Rivendell.
The Denethor pic...

Denethor: Doom, doom! My son is dead, we will burn, we will all burn! *pauses* *stares at camera*
Well, look at that! There's a spot on the wall! What do I keep these servants for?!? SERVAAAAAAAAANTS!!! TO ME WITH A DUSTRAG!

The Legimli pic...

Gimli grew increasingly agitated, as repeatedly during his monologues and closeups the elf dodged in front of him to pose.

Or...

L: Gimli, do you hear that?
G: What?
L: Nothing.
G: Fine, then.
L: Do you hear Nothing?
G: I don't hear anything.
L: I can't hear anything either, just Nothing.
G: You hear nothing and nobody?
L: I can't hear Nobody, he's miles away by now. I only hear Nothing.
G: *mutters* Probably because that's what's in your head...
L: I heard that!
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Old 02-13-2006, 12:31 AM   #9568
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

Legolas refuses to admit that he has no idea where he is.

OR

Gimli: Are we there yet?

Legolas: No.

Gimli: How about now?

Legolas: NO!

Gimli: Now?

Legolas: Yes.

Gimli: Really?

Legolas: No.
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Old 02-13-2006, 05:00 AM   #9569
Nilpaurion Felagund
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Shield Thanks, THE Ka and Farael.

Gimli: What is it? What do you see?

Legolas: Shall I describe it to you . . . or shall I find you a booster saddle.

Gimli: Just tell me what you freakin' see!

Legolas: Krebs cycle.

Gimli:

. . . on second thought, I think I should just have gone with the 'booster saddle' joke.
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Old 02-13-2006, 06:25 AM   #9570
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Rune Son of Bjarne is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Rune Son of Bjarne is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Rune Son of Bjarne is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
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As Legolas is on his most important scouting mission ever, he gets distracted by the german couple having a picnic on his nose.
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Rune is my brother from another mother.

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Old 02-13-2006, 07:45 AM   #9571
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Thumbs up Panto season in Middle-Earth!!!

Legolas:I keep hearing this weird noise!! incidentlly wheres Gimli?
Rest of the fellowship(off screen):hes behind you!!!!
Legolas:Oh no he isn't!!
Rest of the fellowship:
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Old 02-13-2006, 11:48 AM   #9572
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Gimli:so wait a minute Galadrial is already married?
Legolas:yes already
Gimli:but she gave me some hair
Legolas:What she gave you was hair brush which happened to still have hair in it.
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Old 02-13-2006, 12:13 PM   #9573
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up Good Evening. Now its time for the News at Ten.

Legolas: Look, it’s the NEW picture!



Wormtoung: Did you fill my bed with termites?

Eowyn: Erm... No?

OR

Wormy: Do you know there is a head in your bed?
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Old 02-13-2006, 12:28 PM   #9574
Farael
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Eowyn, the King said you have to make your bed and I am not leaving here until you do
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Old 02-13-2006, 01:04 PM   #9575
narfforc
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narfforc has been trapped in the Barrow!
Wormtongue: It's no good sulking, you're not having this room, it's mine now.
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Old 02-13-2006, 01:58 PM   #9576
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Kitanna is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Kitanna is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
Grima: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck, could chuck wood? Answer the question!

or

Grima: We can do this the easy way or the hard way. Now, just answer my question, did you steal my "Best of Michael Jackson" CD?

or

Eowyn knows the Corleone family is after her when she finds a horse head in her bed.
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Old 02-13-2006, 02:04 PM   #9577
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Grima became furious when he discoverd that Eowyn was wearing his favourit dress.
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Old 02-13-2006, 02:10 PM   #9578
Meela
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Meela has just left Hobbiton.
White Tree

Eowyn: For the last time Grima, I do not want a wax model of you to remember you always by. Now get that thing out of my bed!
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'The Hobbit' 1st impressions: 1. Thorin is hot... Oh god, I fancy a dwarf. 2. Thranduil is hotter. 3. Is that... Figwit! 4. Does Elijah Wood never age?
2nd: It's all about Fili & Kili, really. 3rd: BARD! OMG, Bard.
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Old 02-13-2006, 02:12 PM   #9579
mormegil
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mormegil is a guest at the Prancing Pony.mormegil is a guest at the Prancing Pony.
Grima: Ahhhh come on...we can have those girl talks. I'm sensitive I promise.

or

Grima: Okay give me the treasure map and you won't get hurt.
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“I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo.
"So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”
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Old 02-13-2006, 02:24 PM   #9580
Encaitare
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Grima is very confused when he spots a Dixie cup on the wardrobe. Eowyn pretends not to see it, as to speak an Anakronism will get her sent to Mordor.
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Old 02-13-2006, 02:26 PM   #9581
Maeggaladiel
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Maeggaladiel has just left Hobbiton.
When the cabinets were full, Eowyn began hiding the rest of the dead bodies under her bed. No one would ever notice...

Grima: Did your bed get... taller somehow?

Eowyn: *well, now I have to kill him too...*

It was a never-ending cycle.
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Old 02-13-2006, 02:39 PM   #9582
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Tolkien

Grima: Is that a wig?

OR

Eowyn really DID have eyes in the back of her head!
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THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 02-13-2006, 04:47 PM   #9583
Eomer of the Rohirrim
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Eomer of the Rohirrim is a guest at the Prancing Pony.Eomer of the Rohirrim is a guest at the Prancing Pony.
Shield

You know when you get back to their place, and the room's a tip? Puts you right off.
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Old 02-13-2006, 05:25 PM   #9584
Lalwendė
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Lalwendė is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Lalwendė is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
The latest Tracy Emin art show comes to Meduseld.

Grima: "You see, I just love the dichotomy that this suggests. Taken in the everyday context it would be little more than a mess, but placed in the Art Gallery it suggests something tragic, almost biblical."

Eowyn: "No, I still don't get it."
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Old 02-13-2006, 05:54 PM   #9585
THE Ka
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Grima: Give it up Eowyn, you're just not angst teenage attitude enough to cry in your bed all day while listening to Here I am in darkness of my darkness which is very dark, gah... Sssss! by Orc Wasteland...


~ Aesthete
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Hevur tś reikaš lķka sum eg,
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Old 02-13-2006, 06:00 PM   #9586
Glirdan
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Grima: Look what you've done!! You've gotten us all the way to Rohan! How in Eru's name did you manage that!?

Eowyn: Simple! I used MapQuest!!

or

If Grima had known that Eowyn was a Wolf, maybe he wouldn't have asked her if her bed had gotten taller. (Play off of Maeggaladiel)
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Old 02-13-2006, 08:43 PM   #9587
Nilpaurion Felagund
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Nilpaurion Felagund is a guest at the Prancing Pony.Nilpaurion Felagund is a guest at the Prancing Pony.
1420! Can't resist . . .

Wormtongue: Who knows what you've spoken to the dark watches of the night, when the walls of your bower seem to close in about you; a hutch to trammel some wild thing in. How 'bout it, baby? Will you be my wild thing?

(Thanks, Oddie. This is hilarious! )
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The plot, cut, defeated.
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Old 02-13-2006, 09:55 PM   #9588
littlemanpoet
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littlemanpoet is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.littlemanpoet is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
Grķma practices his lines on a manequin.

or

Grķma's Michael Jackson manequin needed some work.
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Old 02-14-2006, 12:34 AM   #9589
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Pipe

When you are the prime suspect for a murder, there is one thing you shouldn't say...

Grima: Don't look in the bed!

OR

Grima: All right, I give up! Where's the money?
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THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 02-14-2006, 01:43 AM   #9590
Lhunardawen
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Silmaril

(playing off Rune)
Grima: Answer me, Eowyn. Why are you wearing your uncle's favorite dress?

OR

Grima: You ask me why I'm wearing black on Valentine's Day? What does this Faramir have that I don't, that's what I want to know.

OR

Eowyn: Grima, what's my Barbie doll doing there?

OR

The sheriffs accidentally killed the Seer. One of the sheriffs is actually the Cobbler and tries to make the other sheriff guilty of hunting the Seer.

OR

The Lovers are having a tiff.
Grima: I told you not to let my fellow wolf be lynched!

Okay, that's enough for now.
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Old 02-14-2006, 07:06 AM   #9591
Rimbaud
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Grima: I just wanted to make my clothes out of a bedsheet, like you have. Is that a crime?
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And all the rest is literature
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Old 02-14-2006, 08:19 AM   #9592
Holbytlass
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Holbytlass has just left Hobbiton.
Grima: Does he look blue to you?
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Old 02-14-2006, 11:13 AM   #9593
The Only Real Estel
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Pipe

The last two villagers enter the home of Theodred only to find him violently maimed by the final wolf and the wolf-to-villager ratio now even...

Grima (wolf): “Sucks for you babe. Sucks for you...”
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Old 02-14-2006, 01:50 PM   #9594
Maeggaladiel
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Maeggaladiel has just left Hobbiton.
Grima figured that if he stared at her long enough, she'd get uncomfortable. Then she'd HAVE to talk to him! <3

OR

Grima: So it's NOT her natural hair color!!

OR

When the piles of clothes came up to their knees, Eowyn knew that Grima had been skipping out on his laundry duties.
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Old 02-14-2006, 02:01 PM   #9595
JennyHallu
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Grima: To get to the other side! Get it?

Eowyn: Um...No.

Grima: Well then how about this one?

Eowyn: Um...No.

Grima: Have you NO sense of humor?!?

Eowyn: Um...No.
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Old 02-14-2006, 04:01 PM   #9596
Lalwendė
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Lalwendė is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Lalwendė is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
Flatmates from Hell

Grima: "He's my best mate and he's been kicked out of his flat. You don't mind if he sleeps in your bed while you're out at Uni all day do you?"
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Old 02-14-2006, 04:02 PM   #9597
The Only Real Estel
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The Only Real Estel has just left Hobbiton.
Pipe Happy Valentine's Day!!!

Appropriate for the day...

Grima: "Oh come on, it's not a difficult question Eowyn! Will you or will you not be my valentine?"
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Old 02-14-2006, 05:41 PM   #9598
Gil-Galad
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Grima: your eyes are like the pits of Orthanc and i'm a sleeping Ent being thrown into it
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Old 02-14-2006, 05:46 PM   #9599
Glirdan
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I'm sorry for this corny pickup line, but I can't resist.

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Old 02-14-2006, 10:32 PM   #9600
The Elf-warrior
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Eowyn starts to wonder if Grima is a vampire.
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