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Old 08-17-2005, 03:24 PM   #6721
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

Aragorn: Gandalf, just apologise and we can be on our way!

Gandalf: Never! I stand by my statement! Your mother was very rude to me Mr. Balrog!

OR

Balrog: I said NO sugar in my tea!

OR

[A joke from many, many captions ago]

Balrog: I shall kill you! You have met your doom in the dark deep of the mighty- ... Ah! I'm on fire! Why didn't you tell me I was on fire?

Gandalf: Sorry, I thought it was your look.
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THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

Last edited by Hookbill the Goomba; 08-17-2005 at 03:27 PM. Reason: Rats in the pipes
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Old 08-17-2005, 04:22 PM   #6722
Gurthang
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Gurthang has just left Hobbiton.
Just before he attacks Gandalf, a giant hand comes out of nowhere and grabs the Balrog around the waste.

OR

Gandalf: "I'm sorry to have bothered you, but I was wondering: Do you have Wings?"
Balrog: "Well,... I, er... uhm,... I've never checked, actually, so I don't really know."

OR

Gandalf's fireworks turn against him.
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Old 08-17-2005, 05:24 PM   #6723
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The Saucepan Man has been trapped in the Barrow!
Boots

It took some effort, but fortunately Gandalf was able to deflect the Balrog's guided missiles.
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Old 08-17-2005, 08:18 PM   #6724
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Very Corny

This Balrog was particularly hot-headed
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“I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo.
"So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”
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Old 08-17-2005, 08:20 PM   #6725
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1420! Old jokes--with a twist.

Gandalf: Don't make me use . . . the shiney pokey-stick of Doom!
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The plot, cut, defeated.
I intend to copy this sig forever - so far so good...
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Old 08-17-2005, 08:40 PM   #6726
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The Fellowship finally found a way to convince Gandalf to keep his Cloak on.
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I listen for returning feet and voices at the door

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Old 08-17-2005, 10:56 PM   #6727
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Gurthang has just left Hobbiton.
Gandalf: "Well, with that big of a torch, I certainly don't need my light anymore."

OR

Gandalf: "This isn't the right path, and there's a Balrog to boot! Ohh! I hate MapQuest!"

OR

Gandalf: "Wow, you big."
Balrog: "Don't say that! I'm very sensitive about my weight."
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Old 08-17-2005, 11:57 PM   #6728
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Aragorn: Do you suppose we should not have let him smoke all that weed back in the Hall of Mazarbul?
Boromir: Yeah, right. What d'ya reckon is he seeing this time?
Aragon: Dunno, he kept shouting about pursuing orks and cave trolls all the way down.
Boromir: As we could hear anything... Must be something bigger this time, the way he jumps and shouts there...
Aragorn: Oh, I'll better go and get him before he throws himself off
Boromir: You better do that
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Old 08-18-2005, 02:50 AM   #6729
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Boots Shoes!

Apparently, that is Saruman the White... uncloaked!

OR

Gandalf: Come on, just a few more steps! You can do it!

Balrog: NO! I can't do it! It's too high up!

Gandalf: This is the last time I let Frodo talk me into teaching circus tricks.
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THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 08-18-2005, 05:26 AM   #6730
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The Balrog's mouth falls open in horror at the sight of the giant hobbit standing behind Gandalf.
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Comme une étoile amarante Comme un papillon de nuit C'est la lumière qui m'attire La flamme qui m'éblouit
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Old 08-18-2005, 06:21 AM   #6731
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Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Showing my age again ...

Question:

Whose last words were "Lawks a mercy, my bottom's on fire!"?

a The Balrog of Moria
b Joan of Arc
c Feanor
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Old 08-18-2005, 06:33 AM   #6732
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Oddwen is a guest of Elrond in Rivendell.Oddwen is a guest of Elrond in Rivendell.Oddwen is a guest of Elrond in Rivendell.
I remember when...

Bill the Balrog: No no no Gandalf, left foot, then right foot!
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Old 08-18-2005, 06:37 AM   #6733
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CaptainofDespair has just left Hobbiton.
The lone member of the Gandalf the Grey: Uncloaked Fanclub has finally caught up to his idol, only to have his autograph request denied.
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Old 08-18-2005, 06:37 AM   #6734
the guy who be short
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the guy who be short has just left Hobbiton.
Unfunny Technicality, but I couldn't resist

Gandalf: Oh. That's a shame.
Balrog: What? *roaaaaaaar*
Gandalf: Oh, cut it out, you're not a real Balrog. Balrogs are meant to be flame wreathed in shadow, not vice versa. *Turns his back and walks off muttering*
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Old 08-18-2005, 10:03 AM   #6735
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Boots

Yes, outrageous ponytails do rock; but it's mighty annoying when they get caught on, say, a bridge.
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Old 08-18-2005, 10:05 AM   #6736
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Gandalf seeks to impress the rest of the Fellowship with his new novelty lighter....

OR

Gandalf reflects for a moment on the wisdom of trying to sneak the Fellowship across the Bridge without paying the toll.....

Last edited by davem; 08-18-2005 at 10:13 AM.
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Old 08-18-2005, 10:32 AM   #6737
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Bêthberry is wading through snowdrifts on Redhorn.Bêthberry is wading through snowdrifts on Redhorn.Bêthberry is wading through snowdrifts on Redhorn.Bêthberry is wading through snowdrifts on Redhorn.
Boots

Gandalf: "I tought I saw a puddy tat. I did, I did. I did see a puddy tat."
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Old 08-18-2005, 10:45 AM   #6738
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The Fellowship learned why there hung a sign "flammable" around the balrog's neck.
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Old 08-18-2005, 01:16 PM   #6739
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

Generic Balrog: Leave him, Bill, he's not worth it

Bill (the Balrog): NO! He has to face the consequences!

Gandalf: All I said was it must be hard for Balrogs to take a shower.
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THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 08-18-2005, 01:36 PM   #6740
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Only TMBG fans will get this...

Minimum waaaaaaage -- YAH!
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Old 08-18-2005, 01:37 PM   #6741
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The Saucepan Man has been trapped in the Barrow!
Boots

Gandalf: You cannot pass! ... pzzft ... You cannot pass! ... pzzft ... You cannot pass! ... pzzft ... You cannot pass! ... pzzft ... You cannot pass! ... pzzft ... You cannot pass! ... pzzft ... You cannot pass! ... pzzft ...

Frodo: Great, the Gandalf decoy seems to be working. Come on fools, let's fly!
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Old 08-18-2005, 02:25 PM   #6742
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Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
Gandalf: "Oh maaan, I didn't know the Crazy World of Arthur Brown were still touring?"
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Old 08-18-2005, 03:00 PM   #6743
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

Balrog: My theme tune is so much better than yours!

Gandalf: Is not!

Balrog: Is to!
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once.
THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 08-18-2005, 03:04 PM   #6744
the guy who be short
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the guy who be short has just left Hobbiton.
Gandalf wonders how the Dwarrowdelf could have been sealed off for centuries, and still have enough oxygen to support and army of Orcs, and still have enough oxygen for an eternally combusting Balrog. Funny, aint it?
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Old 08-19-2005, 03:15 AM   #6745
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Gandalf: OH! So that's why you're not supposed to put metal in a microwave!

OR

Balrog: For the last time! Tom Bombadill can't be a Maiar! I'm a Maiar, I should know!

Gandalf: Shut up you! Your not supposed to even have wings!

Balrog: Oh you had to bring that up didn't you!
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THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 08-19-2005, 05:34 AM   #6746
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Boots

Gandalf couldn't help but be impressed by Pippin's Hallowe'en costume.


or...


Glom the Giant soon realised that fire was dangerous.
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Old 08-19-2005, 07:47 AM   #6747
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Balrog: Gandalf...I am your father!

Gandalf: noooooooooo! Daddy!!!!

~or~


Balrog: Theres something you should know about us

Gandalf: whats that?

Balrog: i am your fathers, brothers, nephews, cousins, former roommate

Gandalf: what does that make us?

Balrog: absolutely nothing
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Old 08-19-2005, 08:30 AM   #6748
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dorky humor

Balrog: If you so much as think of uncloaking yourself here... *waves whip menacingly*

or

Balrog: Ph34r my 1337 skillz.

or

Gandalf: All your bridge are belong to us.
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Old 08-19-2005, 08:42 AM   #6749
the guy who be short
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the guy who be short has just left Hobbiton.
Fortunately, due to the large amount of shadow surrounding him, the Balrog couldn't quite make out where exactly Gandalf was, leaving him perfectly safe as long as he didn't move.
He moved.
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Old 08-19-2005, 08:47 AM   #6750
wilwarin538
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Balrog: New pic or else!



Gandalf prepares to do a cheesy matrix move.
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Old 08-19-2005, 08:50 AM   #6751
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CaptainofDespair has just left Hobbiton.
Old Pics:

The Balrog has finally caught up with Gandalf.

Balrog: You!

Gandalf: Please, I didn't mean to!

Balrog: How dare you say my daughter looks like the most beautiful horse you've ever seen! I went through all that trouble setting your date up, and you do that!

Gandalf: Well, uhh...

Balrog: Time to die, Bill!

Gandalf: Wait! I'm not Bill!

Apparently, the Balrog forgot his glasses. Gandalf now wished they hadn't let poor Bill the Pony go.

New Pic:

Gandalf's School for Breakdancing Orcs seems to be failing, as all the dancers keep dying.

Last edited by CaptainofDespair; 08-19-2005 at 08:54 AM.
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Old 08-19-2005, 09:23 AM   #6752
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
The Eye Eye see thee!



Gandalf: There are so many Orcs! 100,000 at least! I've got a plan. Pippin, distract them!

Pippin:

OR

Gandalf: Will you two guards stop playing rock, scissors, paper!
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THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 08-19-2005, 09:30 AM   #6753
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Morsul the Dark is a guest at the Prancing Pony.Morsul the Dark is a guest at the Prancing Pony.
Gandalf(to gondorian in background):Yoiu relize you have a sword right the guy's right in front of you use your sword not a bow!

-or-

Gandalf:Press the X button now come on I can use my special move! X,X,press X Darn you!

-or-

Gaandalf:I know the CGI artists are busy with Gollum but come on this is ridiculas(sp?)
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Old 08-19-2005, 09:42 AM   #6754
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In the confusion of battle the gondorians and orcs forget whom they should be fighting and they instead of fighting each other they fight their own species.

(look closely and it appears that the gondorian soldiers are in combat and the two orcs are fighting each other)
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Old 08-19-2005, 09:55 AM   #6755
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
1420! A pint of tea

Orc (fighting Gandalf): You will no longer be uncloaked!

Gandalf: NOOOOO!!!!

OR

Gandalf and the Orc test out their new Disco moves.
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Old 08-19-2005, 12:36 PM   #6756
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Gurthang has just left Hobbiton.
Gandalf finally meets his end. Will he come back to life... again?

OR

Gandalf, looking down on the fallen warrior in front of him: "Now did I just kill an orc or a Gondorian? I can't tell!"

OR

Gandalf: "Why are you attacking me?! I only asked for directions!"
Orc: "You used MapQuest! I hate MapQuest!"

OR

Orc: "Gandalf, you've been naughty. Time for your spanking."
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Old 08-19-2005, 01:06 PM   #6757
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Elennar Starfire has just left Hobbiton.
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Gandy: That dead guy is floating...
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Old 08-19-2005, 01:45 PM   #6758
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

Gandalf does not realise that the small fairy next to the fallen Orc was planning to make sure Gandalf got uncloaked at an inappropriate moment.

OR

Being a bodyguard for the Break-dancing Orcs was no easy task.
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THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 08-19-2005, 11:35 PM   #6759
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Gurthang has just left Hobbiton.
Many fell in the battle for the last ticket to see the Breakdancing Orcs Live!(They are in the background.)

OR

Gandalf suddenly sees that the orc he is fighting has an arrow stuck in his butt. That can't be normal.

OR

Gandalf: "How many times do I have to kill the same orc! Ack! There are two more already!"

OR

Darth VadOrc: "Obi-Gan-Dalf-Nobi. When I left you, I was but the learner. Now I have become the Master."
Obi-Gan: "You're only a Master of Evil, Darth!"
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Old 08-20-2005, 04:45 AM   #6760
the guy who be short
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Thulcandra
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the guy who be short has just left Hobbiton.
Gandalf suddenly realises that glowing white in the middle of the night will make him particularly susceptible to Orc arrows.
Gandalf: Bugger.
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