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01-23-2003, 04:12 PM
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#41 |
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Haunting Spirit
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: a place in the United States
Posts: 54
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Legolas: Are you sure your really an elf? even the dwarf could see those orcs coming!
Galadriel:Umm...was that bowl thingie imporatnt?(asked inncoently)well it kind of rolled down the hill and landed in the creek. Gandalf: Geez your old! TreeBeard:well you see the thing is i was kind of playing with Gimli's ax and well...(holds up a tree branch)
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"dont tell the elf"-Gimli |
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01-23-2003, 08:12 PM
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#42 |
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Haunting Spirit
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: a place in the United States
Posts: 54
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Merry and Pippin:hey look, are those mushrooms? PSHYCE!
Legolas:Ya know you look like a freak running around in those tights Sam:Frodo hates you, especially since you forgot the rope!
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"dont tell the elf"-Gimli |
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01-24-2003, 08:32 AM
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#43 |
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Pile O'Bones
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: between a hard and a rocky place
Posts: 22
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To Boromir: Come on! It's only a flesh wound. Get up and fight like a man!
My you're looking Sharpe today Boromir. Is that an Arrow shirt you're wearing? So Gandalf, it's great that Frodo destroyed the ring and all, but what am I going to do with the other six I have just like it at home? Gimli! That's not face cream, it's NAIR! Aragorn, you know that old story about how Sauron broke your sword? Ah, well, they're not exactly true. Actually, Gimli tried to shave with it.
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Men are from Earth. Women are from Earth. Deal with it. |
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02-21-2003, 06:37 AM
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#44 |
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Drummer in the Deep
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Next Sunday A.D.
Posts: 2,145
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To Leggy: Holy cow man, you've got dirt under your fingernail there!
Leggy's response: AIEEEEE!! To Frodo: Ooh, your eyes are so huge, how many minutes does it take to blink? That's why you're so skinny, right? Because blinking helps you to lose weight? To Merry: Wow, your nose is the biggest I've ever seen! Like, wow! To Gandy: Dude, like, chill. To Celeborn: Hey, can you talk a little faster? I find myself being distracted by that pretty little bug there... Galadriel's response: A BUG? To Pippin: Hey, can you help me with my homework? To Elrond: Don't worry, be happy! To Leggy: DIE! Fool of an elf! Fool of a dwarf! Fool of a man! Fool of a fool! Fool of a wizard, oh wait, that's me. Funny, maybe. Wierd, yes. "How's it hangin', Maedhros?" LOL! I'm literally tearing up. [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]
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But all the while I sit and think of times there were before
I listen for returning feet and voices at the door |
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02-21-2003, 08:17 AM
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#45 |
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Pile O'Bones
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: the earth, some where @ skool
Posts: 13
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like the last one
fool of a whatever blah blah blah |
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02-21-2003, 08:25 AM
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#46 |
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Pile O'Bones
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: the earth, some where @ skool
Posts: 13
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how come all u scums are all picking on legolas??
y o y? pick in sauroman and those gits not pretty hoy her alrite!!! |
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02-21-2003, 08:37 AM
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#47 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Wolverhampton, England
Posts: 716
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To sam-"Frodo is a fool."
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“If I’m more of an influence on your son as a rapper then you are as a father then you've got to look at yourself as a parent” ~>Ice Cube. "Life is so beautiful"->Don Vito Corleone |
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02-21-2003, 12:59 PM
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#48 |
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Dread Horseman
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: Behind you!
Posts: 2,743
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wassup, I think you've scored a perfect 26 out of 26 inane posts. Your privileges have been revoked.
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02-21-2003, 02:17 PM
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#49 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Something close like Shire
Posts: 769
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To Gimli: "Watch out, shorty!"
"It takes quite a big leap to get to the other side. Maybe I should toss you?" To Ringwraith (after "Sssshhire? Bagginsssshhh?" -part): "Pardon? Could you repeat that, please?" To Legolas: "Oh, don't you just love the seaside? I can almost here the seamews' screams..."
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Despair is only for those who see the end beyond all doubt. |
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02-22-2003, 03:43 AM
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#50 |
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Haunting Spirit
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Somewhere
Posts: 67
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Gollum: Gollum, let it go. The precious is crud. It's sort of stupid, if you think about it.
Eru: Don't you just hate music? Legolas: Bad news, Legs. Haldir's the new you. Grima: Can you not grow eyebrows? I've always wondered... Glorfindel: Hey, d'you wanna here a dumb blonde joke I just heard? Galadriel: Um... about the stain on your mirror... well my parrot really likes birdbaths and... Haradrim and Mumakil: Hey, look, carnies! Treebeard: Look at this great table! I just ordered it from JC Penny's, solid wood and everything! Not too hilarious, but passable. [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]
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Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we take the Standerdized Tests. |
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02-22-2003, 07:55 AM
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#51 |
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Animated Skeleton
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: A tree somewhere anywhere!
Posts: 34
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Lurtz honey your eyes look a mite bloodshot (sympathetic voice) another night on the tiles eh? why don't you go home and get some sleep?
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"Because i belived you to be indeed Luthien Tinuvel, of whom i was singing. but if you are not she, then you walk in her likeness." - Aragorn |
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02-22-2003, 10:57 AM
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#52 |
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Wight
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Hopelessly lost
Posts: 174
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Ok, Frodo, thanks for the number, I'll give you a ring some...time...oops
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Whatever floats your oyster. |
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02-22-2003, 12:12 PM
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#53 |
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Animated Skeleton
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: The darker side of Mirkwood
Posts: 47
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Arwen, Aragorn is going to die. Deal with it.
Eowyn, Theodred is dead. Get over it. Eomer, go get yourself some lips. Frodo, you look a total ponce in that mithril. Just face it Aragorn, Legolas is soooo much better looking than you. How's the plastic surgery going Haldir? Three words Gimli. Cut. Your. Hair. Boromir, did anyone ever tell you that shield is actually a dinner plate? Well actually Legolas, I set your hair on fire. Muahahaha! Oh go play with your barbie Eowyn. Rosie, I hope you know that Sam is in love with Frodo. Gandalf, did I mention that the entire year's crop of pipeweed has been obliterated? Never mind old chap... Urgh, Elrond! Did you fart? Hey Celeborn. Any reason why you're wearing a dress? Or Hey Celeborn, didn't know you were a cross dresser.
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Amin i waith dangeren i firn i guinar. Amin ith a riel guldur. You keep talking but all I ever hear is blah blah blah. |
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02-23-2003, 05:07 PM
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#54 |
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Animated Skeleton
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Shire
Posts: 46
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Gollum, did I mention I'm an Elf?
Gandalf, I stole your hat and lost it somewhere in Moria. I just thought I'd let you know.
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Frodo: Go back, Sam! I'm going to Mordor alone. Sam: Of course you are, and I'm comming with you! |
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02-24-2003, 01:41 PM
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#55 |
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Animated Skeleton
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Lothlorien
Posts: 49
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hey legolas, your aim sucks! why not look slightly less gay by getting a haircut?
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and is crazy a bad thing to you¿ |
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02-25-2003, 11:40 AM
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#56 |
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Denethor's True Love
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Mirkwood. With Thranduil... *swoon*
Posts: 2,049
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Hey, Denethor, I'd like you to meet the Minas Tirith counsellor.
Here, Denethor, have a box of matches! To Haldir: Ha! You're gonna die!! Hey, Aragorn, you do know you're not the real Isildur's Heir, right?
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'The Hobbit' 1st impressions: 1. Thorin is hot... Oh god, I fancy a dwarf. 2. Thranduil is hotter. 3. Is that... Figwit! 4. Does Elijah Wood never age? 2nd: It's all about Fili & Kili, really. 3rd: BARD! OMG, Bard. |
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02-25-2003, 02:06 PM
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#57 |
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Denethor's True Love
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Mirkwood. With Thranduil... *swoon*
Posts: 2,049
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Hey, Grima, you got a tweezer obsession or what?
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'The Hobbit' 1st impressions: 1. Thorin is hot... Oh god, I fancy a dwarf. 2. Thranduil is hotter. 3. Is that... Figwit! 4. Does Elijah Wood never age? 2nd: It's all about Fili & Kili, really. 3rd: BARD! OMG, Bard. |
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03-03-2003, 08:15 PM
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#59 |
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Wight
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Finally out of the Paths of the Dead!
Posts: 107
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Hey Denethor! What's cooking?
Boromir, can you play "76 Trombones"? Pippin, what kind of mushrooms are those? To Shelob: Hey! Look what I found on the bottom of my shoe! (Shows a smushed spider) He! He! How are those?
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"God is the Lord, of angels, and of men--and of elves" -J.R.R. Tolkien "Faithless is he that says farewell when the road darkens."-Gimli "Spiders are hideous."-Dietrich Bonhoeffer |
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03-03-2003, 08:52 PM
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#60 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Massachusetts - digging up a bottomless hole, searching for something that's not there...
Posts: 1,514
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I can't think of a funny one with this right now, but I'd be interested to see what you could come up with up: Gimli's grandpa's name is Groin. Now that's nasty. My humor is always either really twisted, or kindergarden level. I'll give it a try though.
Nazgul (only people who have read the bad Russian translation of LotR, there's two, one's bad, might get this. But then, they probably won't think it's funny.) Seriously, "Sumnicksssss.......Shire...." sounds so crummy. The new thing is Baggins, didn't you hear? To Butterbur- now, send out this letter for me, but I will be back in a week to personally will be checking that it has been sent. To Gollum- Oh my god! Fish are so out! Get some lembas...it's the urge....for lembas! To Rosie- You know, Sam is only using you as a cover for somebody special...
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"Glue... very powerful stuff." |
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03-03-2003, 09:03 PM
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#61 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Chillaxin' with Glorfindel-441 miles on the RtR
Posts: 1,197
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LOL! Funny!
Frodo you pansy! Stop being such a coward and get a life! And stop stroking that ring, you're making me sick! Hey, Gandalf? Can you do some REAL magic? Psst...Elrond...I think you mistook Arwen's tiara for your crown. S'all for now.
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"There's a big...machine in the sky...some kind of electric snake...coming straight at us." "Shoot it," said my attorney. "Not yet...I want to study its habits." |
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03-03-2003, 09:21 PM
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#62 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Massachusetts - digging up a bottomless hole, searching for something that's not there...
Posts: 1,514
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Lol! I really like the tiara one.
Wormtongue- Oh my god! I have to tell you! That Eowyn, she is like, sooo ugly! I mean, who dresses like that?! Oh, and she's getting married. Wanna come? [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img] [ March 03, 2003: Message edited by: GaladrieloftheOlden ] [ March 03, 2003: Message edited by: GaladrieloftheOlden ]
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"Glue... very powerful stuff." |
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03-04-2003, 12:52 PM
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#63 |
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Denethor's True Love
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Mirkwood. With Thranduil... *swoon*
Posts: 2,049
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(cant do quotes)
"Hey Denethor! Whats cooking?" *rolls on the floor laughing and doesnt stop for a fortnight*
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'The Hobbit' 1st impressions: 1. Thorin is hot... Oh god, I fancy a dwarf. 2. Thranduil is hotter. 3. Is that... Figwit! 4. Does Elijah Wood never age? 2nd: It's all about Fili & Kili, really. 3rd: BARD! OMG, Bard. |
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03-04-2003, 01:04 PM
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#64 |
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Wight
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: dor-lomin, of course
Posts: 167
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(to Aragorn) "Eighty, eh? Don't you think you're a bit old for this?"
(to Sauron) "I know where the ring is." (unless you like being tortured) (to the ring) "Go home!"
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I used to be indecisive. Now, I'm not so sure. |
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03-04-2003, 01:34 PM
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#65 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: The inside of Legolas' lungs
Posts: 1,005
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Groin, hahahahahaha. I loved the Denethor one as wel. The funniest thing is: Those Leggyboppers don't get it. That makes it even better.
Can't think up any right now. Greetings, Anuion ________ The dearborn independent Last edited by Helkahothion; 03-07-2011 at 03:06 AM. |
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03-06-2003, 04:03 PM
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#66 |
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Animated Skeleton
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Nazguls foster home
Posts: 36
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To Gollum: Ha Ha! Fooled you! The real ring is in my pocket.
To Treebeard: Say, have we run out of firewood? To Galadriel: WOW! Nice bird bath! To Legolas: Oh dear. We have run out of tights. To Legolas:MMMM, nice Lembas bread! Say, do you have any marmite to go with this? To Aragorn (trying to recover after Boromirs death): We haven't had food for days! Its like im DYING! Ah, my feet are KILLING me! Luckly our path only goes DEAD straight!(sobs of Aragorn). To Gimli: Oooo, that gap looks long. Looks like we have to toss you over. To Frodo: Fool! Thats a wedding ring! To Pippin: Oh dear, Second Breakfast has been banned.
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Its not the size of the dog in the fight but the size of the fight in the dog |
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03-06-2003, 08:09 PM
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#67 |
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Shade of Carn Dûm
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Somewhere Else
Posts: 439
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Hey you guys? [to hobbits] you're feet are realllly hairy you know that?
Hey Gandalf, I wonder what would happen if I unplugged this wire coming from your staff! Legolas, dude, your dropped your travel pack of hair care products somewhere near the caves of Moria, thought ya might wanna kno [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] ~Elencala
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Prevent Merry-abuse today! Join the S.A.M. (That's the Save-A-Merry foundation) Rivendell brought to you by the long lost sister of the guy who be short. |
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03-07-2003, 09:07 AM
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#68 |
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Wight
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Finally out of the Paths of the Dead!
Posts: 107
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To Beorn: (imitating Smokey Bear) Only you can prevent forest fires! Eh Beorn!? Eh?
To Gandalf (With the wolves below the Misty Mountains): Oh yeah Gandalf? Look what I can do!(pulls out a small lighter) To Gollum(mockingly): Ha Ha! What has it got in it's pocketses? Ha Ha! You're so naive! Not bad, eh?
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"God is the Lord, of angels, and of men--and of elves" -J.R.R. Tolkien "Faithless is he that says farewell when the road darkens."-Gimli "Spiders are hideous."-Dietrich Bonhoeffer |
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03-07-2003, 09:59 AM
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#69 |
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Animated Skeleton
Join Date: Dec 2002
Posts: 39
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(to any ringwraith) : ok, you can drop the lisp now!!!
ringwraith: what lisp? or ..... listen, i know a really really good speech therapist..
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i couldn't repair your brakes, so i made your horn louder!!! you must lead a horse to water, but, a pencil must be lead... |
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03-07-2003, 08:20 PM
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#70 |
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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Gimli: So...I hear your cousins Grumpy and Doc are in town...
Gollum: I don't have The Ring...But I do! Gandalf: Well...I see someone listened to me and used Tide! Cave Troll: Hey...did you by anychance work for Harry Potter at one time? |
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03-09-2003, 01:17 AM
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#71 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Something close like Shire
Posts: 769
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To Legolas: So, you'll become the king after your father, aye? And what kingdom will you rule?? Legoland???
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Despair is only for those who see the end beyond all doubt. |
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03-09-2003, 08:44 AM
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#72 |
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Haunting Spirit
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: A shotgun shack
Posts: 86
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The water here is pretty polluted, Gollum. You might wanna cook that fish.
Aragorn, don't you think that necklace is a little girly for you? Wow, Gandalf, Shadowfax just had the biggest poop! You've got Dutch elm disease! (To an ent) Bilbo, you cheapskate! Of all the things in Bag End you could give me, this is the last thing I'd want!
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"No food, no rest, nothing for Smeagol," said Gollum. "He's a sneak." |
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03-11-2003, 05:10 AM
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#73 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: On the sand dunes outside of Ilium, watching it burn.
Posts: 1,291
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Legolas: Did you really think that by hiding under a bush those carbain couldnt see you... and people call me blonde!
Aragorn: Dude i think you need your hearing checked.. how could you not hear all thoes uruk-hai runnig up that hill with creaking armour before you told Frodo to go alone to Mordor? Really.... Legolas: LOOK CROW! Elrond: so, this a programme on the martix, right?
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"Athena, stepping up behind him, visible to no one but Achillies, gripped his red-gold hair. Startled he made a half turn, and he knew her upon the instant for Athena." ~The Iliad~ ~My lord, Éomer~
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