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Old 09-01-2017, 02:37 PM   #1
ArcusCalion
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Of Men

This is the first draft of the chapter Of Men

Our basis text is that of Later Quenta Silamrillion given in HoME 11; page 173-175, based on the complete text given in HoME 5; pages 245-248. I have not tracked the changes from QS to LQ, but have taken them up silently into the text. Wherever the text is different from that this is marked by an editing mark.

The markings are:
OM-xx for any and all changes. There were not too many, so to give multiple kinds of markers seemed redundant.

Some conventions of my writing:
Normal Text is from the basic text that is mentioned above (when I change the basic-Text it will be mentioned)
Bold Text = source information, comments and remarks
{example} = text that should be deleted
[example] = normalised text, normally only used for general changes
<source example> = additions with source information

Quote:
OF MEN

§81. Thus the Valar sat now behind the mountains at peace, and all save Manwë and Ulmo dismissed the exiled Noldor from their thought; and having given light to Middle-earth they left it for long untended, and the lordship of Morgoth was uncontested save by the valor of the {Gnomes}[Noldor]. Most in mind Ulmo kept them, who gathered news of the earth through all the waters.
OM-01 <LT Now the {Eldar or Qendi}[Quendi] had the gift of speech direct from Ilúvatar, and it is but the sunderance of their fates that has altered {them}[their tongues] and made them unlike; yet is none so little changed as the tongue of the Dark Elves of {Palisor}[Endor]. Now the tale tells of a certain {fay}[Maia], and names him Tû the wizard, for he was more skilled in OM-02{magics}[enchantments] than any that have dwelt ever yet beyond the land of Valinor; and wandering about the world he found the Elves and he drew them to him and taught them many deep things, and he became as a mighty king among them, and their tales name him the Lord of Gloaming and all the OM-03{fairies}[Elves] of his realm Hisildi or the twilight people. Now the places about {Koivie-neni}[Cuiviénen] the Waters of Awakening are rugged and full of mighty rocks, and the stream that feeds that water falls therein down a deep cleft a pale and slender thread, but the issue of the dark lake was beneath the earth into many endless caverns falling ever more deeply into the bosom of the world. There was the dwelling of Tû the wizard, and fathomless hollow are those places, but their doors have long been sealed and none know now the entry.
There was a pallid light of blue and silver flickering ever, and many strange spirits fared in and out beside the numbers of the Elves. Now of those Elves there was one Nuin, and he was very wise, and he loved much to wander far abroad, for the eyes of the Hisildi were becoming exceeding keen, and they might follow very faint paths in those dim days. On a time did Nuin wander far to the east of {Palisor}[Endor], and few of his folk went with him, nor did Tû send them ever to those regions on his business, and strange tales were told concerning them; but now curiosity overcame Nuin, and journeying far he came to a strange and wonderful place the like of which he had not seen before. A mountainous wall rose up before him, and long time he sought a way thereover, till he came upon a passage, and it was very dark and narrow, piercing the great cliff and winding ever down.
Now daring greatly he followed this slender way, until suddenly the walls dropped upon either hand and he saw that he had found entrance to a great bowl set in a ring of unbroken hills whose compass he could not determine in the gloom. Suddenly about him them gushed the sweetest odors of the Earth — nor were more lovely fragrances ever upon the airs of Valinor, and he stood drinking in the scents with deep delight, and amid the fragrance of evening flowers came the deep odors that many pines loosen upon the midnight airs.
Suddenly afar off down in the dark woods that lay above the valley's bottom a nightingale sang, and others answered palely afar off, and Nuin well-nigh swooned at the loveliness of that dreaming place, and he knew that he had trespassed upon Murmenalda or the "Vale of Sleep", where it is ever the time of first quiet dark beneath young stars, and no wind blows.
Now did Nuin descend deeper into the vale, treading softly by reason of some unknown wonder that possessed him, and lo, beneath the trees he saw the warm dusk full of sleeping forms, and some were twined each in the other's arms, and some lay sleeping gently all alone, and Nuin stood and marveled, scarce breathing.
Then seized with a sudden fear he turned and stole from that hallowed place, and coming again by the passage through the mountain he sped back to the abode of Tû; and coming before that oldest of wizards he said unto him that he was new come from the Eastward Lands, and Tû was little pleased thereat; nor any the more when Nuin made an end of his tale, telling of all he there saw — "and methought," said he, "that all who slumbered there were children, yet was their stature that of the greatest of the Elves."
Then did Tû fall into fear of Manwë, nay even of Ilúvatar the Lord of All, and he said to Nuin <Outline A that the sleepers he had found were the new Children of Ilúvatar, and that they were waiting for light. He forbade any of the Elves to wake them or to visit those places, being frightened of the wrath of Ilúvatar; but despite this Nuin went there often and watched, sitting on a rock. Once he stumbled against a sleeper, who stirred but did not wake. At last, overcome by curiosity, he awakened two, named Ermon and Elmir. They were dumb and very much afraid, but he taught them much of the {Ilkorin}[Avarin] tongue, for which reason he is called Nuin Father of Speech. Then came the first dawn; and Ermon and Elmir alone of Men saw the first Sun rise in the West and come over to the OM-04 {Eastward Haven}[east].> OM-05<Outline D [Footnote: Men grew in stature, and gathered knowledge of the Dark-elves, but Tû faded before the Sun and hid in the bottomless caverns.]>
§82. OM-06[Thus,] at the first rising of the Sun above the earth the younger children of the world awoke in the land of Hildórien in the midmost parts of Middle-earth beyond the Great River and the Inner Sea, OM-07 {in regions which neither the Eldar nor the Avari have known}; for measured time had come upon earth, ....
§83. Of Men [Footnote....
§84. Not long had .... when every leaf is green.
OM-08 <GA 60 {Indeed we learn now in Eressëa from the Valar, through our kin that dwell still in Aman,}[However, it is now known] that after Dagor-nuin-Giliath Melkor was so long in assailing the Eldar with strength for he himself had departed from Angband, for the last time [save once]. Even as before at the awakening of the Quendi, his spies were watchful, and tidings soon came to him of the arising of Men. This seemed to him so great a matter that secretly under shadow he went forth into Middle-earth, leaving the command of the War to Sauron his lieutenant. Of his dealings with Men the Eldar knew naught at that time, and know little now, for neither the Valar nor Men have spoken to them clearly of these things.
$80. But that some darkness lay upon the hearts of Men (as the shadow of the kinslaying and the doom of Mandos lay upon the Noldor) the Eldar perceived clearly even in the fair folk of the Elf-friends that they first knew. To corrupt or destroy whatsoever arose new and fair was ever the chief desire of Morgoth; but as regards the Eldar, doubtless he had this purpose also in his errand: by fear and lies to make Men their foes, and bring them up out of the East against Beleriand. But this design was slow to ripen, and was never wholly achieved, for Men (it is said) were at first very few in number, whereas Morgoth grew afraid of the tidings of the growing power and union of the Eldar and came back to Angband, leaving behind at that time but few servants, and those of less might and cunning.>
§85. OM-09{But}[And] the dawn ... lesser folk of the divine race; or else, it is said, they are at times OM-10{re-born into their own children}[re-housed], and ....
§86. More frail were Men ...
§87. In after days, ... Mortal, {Earendel}[Eärendil] and Elwing, and Elrond OM-11 [and Elros] their child[ren].
OM-01:The story of the awakening of Men is never told more fully than in the Lost Tales fragment, and it would be a shame to leave it out, especially since it is largely not contradicted in any later version. There is room even for it to harmonize with the Tale of Adanel, which is itself said to be not necessarily true.
OM-02: as in other chapters, I change magic to enchantments, because the word magic has evil connotations for Tolkien.
OM-03: the LT word fairies almost always refers to the Elves.
OM-04: I removed the reference about the Haven of the Sun, as its validity in later myth is questionable.
OM-05: I included this as a footnote, since I could not figure out how to work it into the text, but I think it is necessary to include the information, as Tu needs to exit the story somehow.
OM-06: simply harmonizing the transition from LT to QS
OM-07: Because of the Lost Tales story, the Avari cannot say to have not known Hildorien. However, CT notes the impossibility of this assertion based on the geographic placing of Hildorien in the earlier part of the passage, so I figured it was not a contradiction or too risky of me to drop it.
OM-08: This insert from the Grey Annals describes the exodus of Melkor to the East to corrupt men as proof, and was not contradicted later on, so this seems the best place to include it.
OM-09: I changed "but" to "and" because with the intrusion of the Melkor story into the narrative, the relation between the former end of the last paragraph (when every leaf is green) to the beginning of this one (But the day oft..) is lost. The And is a smoother transition.
OM-10: Simply reconciling with the later version of elvish rebirth myth.
OM-11: adding in Elros.

The Lost Tales stuff is the most questionable part of the chapter, but I figured I'd throw it in, and let everyone decide what to do with it.

Last edited by ArcusCalion; 09-03-2017 at 02:26 AM.
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