To be complete...

[Tigerlily Gamgee]

So, I'm reading this book right now called A Return to Love. A friend lent it to me last year when she thought I was feeling quite down and that I needed it. She said that it changed her life and that she was sure it would change mine (I don't know if it will, even now that I read it, but it does make some good points, whether you are Christian or not [which I am not, really, overwhelmingly])Well, I started to read it at that point, but I stopped... maybe I didn't need it. I just recently picked it up again because of something I've gone through in life. I felt that maybe I did need it now. She made such a big deal about it being so wonderful I thought I'd give it a go.
So, "Where is this all going?" I bet you're asking yourself. Well, this book has an interesting section on relationships. I enjoy the way it views and describes them and I think it makes some good points... some good points that could be brought up for discussion here.
It speaks of a "special relationship" which means that one person we seek out who we think shall complete us. This made me think of Eowyn and how, I think, she thought Aragorn could save her with love. For example, the book says:

The special relationship makes other people - their behavior, their choices, their opinions of us - too important. It makes us think we need another person, when in fact we are complete and whole as we are

Eowyn sees Aragorn as someone who can heal her... give her the love she's been denied. Perhaps she feels weak... when we, obviously, know that she is not. In that manner, she was whole from the beginning. It wasn't Aragorn that she was really chasing after when she dressed as Dernhelm, even if she may have thought that. None of us truly know why she went, because it's never spelt out in the book... there are only interpretations. It is said she went because she wanted to die. Maybe she did. She was under the delusion that without Aragorn's love she was nothing... without Theoden's love, she was nothing... if all that she loved was gone, then she should be gone as well.
The book mentions different kind of relationships... those where we just meet someone for a day, an hour, a minute... but who we can learn from. I know I've experienced this, and I surely know that characters in LOTR experience this on their journey. Then there is the one where two people meet, are together for a time, and separate when all that's needed to be learned is learned... perhaps this is what Eowyn and Aragorn had. Eowyn didn't get what she thought she wanted, but she surely learned a lesson from him... and perhaps he, unknowingly, brought out an inner strength in her that she always had but was blind to. Then there is the third kind... where people are together for their lives... Aragorn and Arwen.

The book mentions two styles of relationships - the "special one" and the "holy one."

The purpose of a special relationship is to teach us to hate ourselves, while the purpose of a holy relationship is to heal us of our self-loathing. In the special relationship, we are always trying to hide our weaknesses. In the holy relationship, it's understood that we all have unhealed places, and that healing is the purpose of our being with another person.

In a way... Eowyn never really did let her true self shine to Aragorn. Rather, I think she was trying to be who she thought he wanted. Whereas with Faramir, she was herself, right at the start. She never hid her emotions from Faramir.
The book then mentions how you can't find a true relationship until you, yourself are whole. You can't look to be "fixed" or "completed" by another... you must fix yourself first.
I think that by the time Eowyn met Faramir she had completed herself. She had set out what she thought she wanted to do, failed at that (or so she thought), and then came out the other side.
Many people claim that Faramir "tamed" Eowyn, but I don't think he did. I don't think she was ever "wild." She was driven, that's for sure... but it was her emotions and fears that drove her. It's not like she sat up in bed everynight and plotted out her emotions and her life. Once those emotions and fears were stripped from her, she could see for herself who she really was. Faramir didn't "heal" her, she healed herself, and he was there to receive her because he, too, had healed himself.

These views are all based on this book. I'm making the comparisons based on what the book says. I do not think this book is the "end all" of all answers, but I thought it'd make for interesting dicussion.
So, if Aragorn was Eowyn's special relationship, then Faramir was her holy one.