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Old 04-28-2005, 01:26 PM   #1
Squidy the Navigator
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Ring Be LotR be an allegory fer fightin' Communism?

Th' big problem I be havin' wi' th' Lord o' th' Rings trilogy be 'tis obviously capitalist propaganda. I be serious here, dasn't jus' discount this on accoun' o' ye like th' books. At least read what I be havin' t' say before ye start shoutin' this down.

Middle Earth represents th' world, nay that 'tis an incredible leap t' that conclusion. Th' humans, elves, an' dwarves represent th' first world nations. Th' goblinoid races be th' second world. Th' others, such as th' Halflings, Haradrim, Easterlings, an' so on be th' third-world nations.

Th' Race o' Man (human crewmaties) represents th' United States o' America, th' British Empire, th' Spanish, an' th' French. Th' most plentiful species o' Middle Earth, tho far too concerned wi' power an' acquisition. In other words, imperialism.

Th' Race o' Elves be Germany. Read between th' lines; they be havin' Master Race written all o'er them. Fair, artistic, yet warriors, an' so on. Swabbieally, I think they be more romanticised t' how Aryans be depicted, rather than how they actually be.

Th' Race o' Dwarves... I dasn't think I need t' say who they be. We all know. Great craftsmen, wealth-oriented, warriors, short an' stocky, bit o' a grudge between them an' th' elves, etc etc. Tolkien pretty clearly wasn`t a fan o' them either, hence how he depicted them.

Th' Halflings be a hard call, but I suspect they's th' protectorate o' Puerto Rico. Sort o' a squadron bounced aft an' fore a bit, but otherwise completely disregarded. More than likely, tho, they be wholly fictional, a representation o' a capitalist paradise.

Mordor be obviously th' Soviet Union. A giant, dark nation lyin' t' th' East, filled wi' ghoulish swabbies who think only o' they's self. I be nay knockin' Eastern Europe, 'tis jus' that in Tolkien`s time they used t' really, really dehumanize the'r enemies. Propaganda cartoons, particularly American ones, depicted enemy soldiers as ape-men. I forget th' exact term, but 't be somethin' like "Gorillafication" that be used by later historians t' describe this. Ye can find a couple examples o' this at:

http://www.learntoquestion.com/resou...jump.cgi?ID=82
http://www.learntoquestion.com/resou...ump.cgi?ID=541


Th' Urik-Kai represent th' goal o' th' Soviet Union, th' way Communists wanted t' be. Manufactured, physically superior, an' while intelligent they be devoid "distractions" like art an' culture. Unlike th' normal soldiers, they be unhindered by light (symbolic o' humanity, warmth, take yer pick).

So then, what be Th' One Rin'? Th' One Rin' be economic dominance. Think about 't: a gold rin' that gives its wearer whaterethey desire most. Pivotal t' th' dominance o' Middle Earth. Whomereholds 'tis corrupted by its evil.

Th' story follows th' ideal capitalists carryin' economic dominance. Now that 't has come into play, they must ensure that th' Soviets nerecapture 't. This calls fer them t' destroy 't by returnin' 't t' 'ere 't came: th' free market. Upon accomplishin' this, they destroy th' core strength o' th' Soviet Union, an' by doomin' them t' economic isolation they eventually collapse.

O' course, in order t' write th' book, J.R.R. Tolkien would need foreknowledge o' future events. Either that or he be jus' very good at predictin' things, or more likely... he`s John Titor. John Titor, famous time traveler sent from th' future t' retrieve a computer model only available in th' 70`s. Rather than simply changin' th' clock settings on th' computer or settin' up a new OS, th' military sends th' lad's aft in time. This be consistant wi' th' wasteful nature o' militaries everywhere. Why John titor would set sail aft an' time t' write anti-communist fantasy work be beyond me, but perhaps he needed a steam press from that era an' had some time t' kill.

In conclusion, John Titor be clearly a time-travelin' anti-Semite who hated Communism. Ya scurvy dog!
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