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Old 06-15-2003, 08:25 PM   #1
mordor136
Wight
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: snowboarding with Morgoth in the void
Posts: 221
mordor136 has just left Hobbiton.
Pipe New Movie Script

Feel free to tar and feather me if this has been done before but I cant find it anywhere.
I would like for us to rewrite the Lotr movies scene by scene. Each person who posts must rewrite one scene in a more comical form until we have finished fotr and ttt. Here we go!
Prologue

Galadriel (in a suprisingly masculine voice):
The world is changing
It has becoming increasingly more evil and dangerous. Enron executives now head the Middle Earth Board of Treasury. Even in the Shire 401K plans are becoming less rewarding, but it was not always so... IT WAS WORSE!

(Camera zooms into mordor and cuts into a close-up of Sauron who shreiks because his mascara is running in the heat of Sammath Naur.)

Sauron: How am I supposed to mount a brutal conquest of Middle Earth without a proper make-up crew!

(just then Peter Jackson makes a suprise cameo by eating a carrot and tossing it into the firey chasam)

Galadriel:Ahem as I was saying Sauron the dark lord had crushed most of the opposition with use of the ONE RING and also created a form of pollution that still remains over many cities today. then only called stuff like the shadow of Sauron now called SMOG! In a great battle to smite the enemy Gil-galad was instead smitten. At the death of his father ,Elindil, Isildur came face to face with thew enemy...

Isildur:My fathers sword may be broken but it can still do damage to that high priced French manicure of yours!\

Sauron:NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! anything but that. Take anything you want of mine but dont hurt my poor nails!

Isildur:OK how about your ring.

Sauron:Sure it is worthless to me! here it is

(pulls of the ring and with a last scream of OOPS! vanishes.)

Galadriel: The rest is history. He took the ring instead of destroying it. Is ambushed by orcs seeking to claim his ex.large cheeseburger and in an effort to save his burger puts the ring ont the burger so that it vanishes and tosses it into the river anduin. So he was slain for waisting the glorious sandwich and the legend of the ring began.

OK its up to you now to rewrite the next scene. (gandalf comes to the shire) have fun! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
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