Balrog Appreciation Month

[Glirdan]

Well everyone, you know what month it is! That's right! It's.... BALROG APPRRECITAION MONTH!!! So let's give a big hand to the "Balrog's of Morgoth" as Captain Obvious puts it. So if you see a Balrog, wear a fire protective suit (we don't want anyone to get 3rd degree burns now do we?) and give it a hug. But what ever you do, DON'T ASK IT IF IT HAS WINGS!!! Remember, this month isn't dedicated to bothering the Balrog's, it's to appreciate them. As you can see by my avvie, I've already started celebrating! So come in, join the fun and remember, no asking it if it has wings.

[Gurthang]

Sweet! Balrogs are so cool! Who else could be on fire but cast shadow out instead of light?! I sure wish I could do that, it would be great at parties for lighting effects. I've always admired the Balrogs as a group because together they defeated even Ungoliant, who Morgoth was overcome by! That's like awesome. They could have theoretically overthrown the Dark Lord; though this is impossible because they were completely obedient to him(obedience gives them extra points, too). So basically... they are just freakin' sweet!

[Glirdan]

Originally Posted by Gurthang

Sweet! Balrogs are so cool! Who else could be on fire but cast shadow out instead of light?! I sure wish I could do that, it would be great at parties for lighting effects.

Only one slight problem with that. There would be no light. But I agree completely, it would be really awsome. Have fir encircling you and not getting hurt and cast darkness. So cool! Hey! Look! It's a Balrog! I'm gonna give it a hug! *puts on fire protective suit* Mr. Balrog! Come Back!! I want to give you a hug!!!!!!

[Formendacil]

Originally Posted by Glirdan

Only one slight problem with that. There would be no light.

"Fire and Shadow."

[Holbytlass]

I suppose if I have to find something appreciative about Balrogs, I guess it would be without them there would be no cool fight to the deaths between Gandalf and a balrog in TTT and Legolas (Orlando Bloom) wouldn't have been able to do that scared-stare (FOTR) when he properly had brown eyes.
Whew, I guess that wasn't so bad *pats balrog on head*.

[Bêthberry]

*hands out long, springy strapplings from yew trees, carefully carved into a point at one end, and lots and lots and lots of bags of marshmellows*

[Lily Bombadil]

I want to appreciate my favourite Balrog. His name is Bob. Moreover, I would like to express my appreciation in song:

For he's a jolly good balrog,
For he's a jolly good balrog,
For he's a jolly good BAAAALROOOOOG!!!!!!!!! Which nobody can deny!
Which nobody can deny!
Which nobody can deny!
For he's a jolly good bonfiiiiiiire! I mean balrooooooog!
Which nobody can deny!

Woohoo!! Yeah! Let's hear it for Bob! Putcha hands in the air! (oo! oo!) Wave 'em like ya just don't care! (oo! oo!)

I apologise for the bizaare quality of this post. I was just head-banging to System Of A Down and now my head hurts...

[Glirdan]

I love your song Lily. Go Bob go!! He can be our mascot for the month!!! *Sees another Balrog* I'll be back later. Got to go give the Balrog a hug! *Puts fire protective suit on and runs after Balrog* YOU WON'T GET AWAY FROM ME THIS TIME BALROG!! GET BACK HERE!!

[The Perky Ent]

Balrog Appreciation Month, eh? How perfect! I'm prepared just for the occasion! You see...

I was traveling down Bucklan, when i was approached by a hobbit. "Hello my good sir!" he said. "Shoo" I said. "Why you look like a crafty business man!" A crafty business man! I never knew! In thanks, I asked his name, and he replied "Facknol Drakkiath!" "What can I do ya for Drakkie? " I says , and he pulls somethign out of this box, and asks if I want to wear it. "What is it?" I says. And he just sat there and laughed for a minute. Then, he threw it on my head, and I felt a burning sensation! I was on fire! As an ent...this is not a good thing. At once I killed the hobbit. Then, after a minute of pain, a whip formed out of my fist, and it was then I first realized. I was a balrog! At once, I ran through bywatter, burning as i go. I put it out...but some things are unavoidable. I didn't know how to unresume by Balrog form, so in confusion, I scratched my head. When I did this, I ceased to be a Balrog, and turned back into an ent. From my head fell this adorable little mask that looked like a Balrog. I stored it in my secret chest of magical goodies, and haven't used it since!

Well...now seems like an appropreate occasoin!

*puts on Balrog mask*

Happy Holidays Everyone!




*******************

Andn don't worry! I hug myself at night lol

[Glirdan]

I would like to aknowledge a very special Balrog today. Johnny the Stinky Balrog. Gil-Gallad's closest friend. If you need more information on how special this Balrog is, please visit the Fourtunately/Unfourtunately thread or "The Adventures of Gil-Galad and Johnny the Stinky Balrog" All donations for Johnny go to Gil.

[Gil-Galad]

i really have to get to work on those...

[Roggie of Morgoth]

Roggie was scrolling for exercise in Moria's corridors, humming under his nose:

Empty spaces - what are we living for
Abandoned places (indeed, where did all dwarves go?) - I guess we know the score...
On and on, does anybody know what we are looking for... (some wizard or another would come in handy, it's boring!)
Another hero, another mindless crime
Behind the curtain, in the pantomime
Hold the line, does anybody want to take it anymore
The show must go on
The show must go on, yeah
Inside my heart is breaking
My make-up may be flaking (especially eyeliner is prone to...)
But my smile still stays on

Whatever happens, I'll leave it all to chance
Another heartache, another failed romance (and I did loved that chick of a maia, honest!)
On and on, does anybody know what we are living for?
I guess I'm learning (I'm learning learning learning, well, I do, don't I?)
I must be warmer now (hm, indeed, being fiery and whatnot)
I'll soon be turning (turning turning turning)
Round the corner now...

Stop! What's this, right round the corner? Balrog appreciation thread? Good grief, are my eyes deceiving me? What? No interviews? Hey, hey, Mr. Reporter, ask me, ask me, please, please ask me about wings! Hey, I won't mind, honest!

[Lily Bombadil]

I apologise; for it seems I've forgotten to hug Johnny. And given that he is Gil-Galad's best friend, and I am Gil-Galad's best girl, I am ashamed for having forgotten. *slips into fire-protective suit* Johnny, wait!!!!!!!!!! *hugs Johnny's ankle* I lurve you, Johnny.......but you STINK!

[Glirdan]

Umm, Mr. Roggie? May I ask you a rather personal question? Do you have wings?

[Gil-Galad]

Johnny does need the love after being blown up and killed a couple times by some not very nice people on Fortunately/Unforunately

[Roggie of Morgoth]

Umm, Mr. Roggie? May I ask you a rather personal question? Do you have wings?

Yes, yes, of course, I love it when people ask me things!

Here, them pro- and contra- wingers are all wrong. The truth, as oft happens, lies in between - all balrogs have wings, but each has only one - left or right. As with humans, there are some who are right-handed, and some who are left-handed. The story is similar with us - majority are right- winged, the gifted few, like myself, are left-winged. See, I'll unfold it for you, ain't it a beauty? Yet even the single wing is so huge, it has to be unfolded in both directions from the body when balrog is contained in limited space, like caverns here.

You ask if we fly with it? No, we don't. You see, we use it to fun ourselves, mainly. Being fiery spirit and all can be quite stifling at times. I hate it when my eyeliner swims cause of sweat, but there! - I have my wing to fan myself with, so I manage to remain fiery and look attractive at the same time

You can take photoes, of course. I'll even sign one for you, the cute gracious me

[Estelyn Telcontar]

One Wing to fan them all...

[Glirdan]

Thank you Roggie of Morgoth for that wonderful enlightning information on Balrogs. I'm sure now we can stop that "Do Balrog's have wings?" debate. Oh yes, for further information on any Balrog, please visit the thread that previously said. Any donations for Roggie of Morgoth go to him and Mr. and Mrs. HI.

[Lhunardawen]

How in Arda could anyone forget Bill the Breakdancing Balrog?

[Glirdan]

Originally Posted by Lhunardawen

How in Arda could anyone forget Bill the Breakdancing Balrog?

The answer to that my dear is that I'm still technically a newbie. I don't know all th Balrogs, yet. I'm sure that I will probably meet most of them on this thread.

Anyway, getting back. Bill the breakdancing Balrog! He's a Balrog! AND he breakdances!! Everyone come see the famous Breakdancing Bill!! All donations for Bill the Breakdancing Balrog go to Lhunardawen.

[mark12_30]

Originally Posted by Roggie of Morgoth

Empty spaces - what are we living for
Abandoned places (indeed, where did all dwarves go?) - I guess we know the score...
On and on, does anybody know what we are looking for... (some wizard or another would come in handy, it's boring!)
Another hero, another mindless crime
Behind the curtain, in the pantomime
Hold the line, does anybody want to take it anymore
The show must go on
The show must go on, yeah
Inside my heart is breaking
My make-up may be flaking (especially eyeliner is prone to...)
But my smile still stays on

Whatever happens, I'll leave it all to chance
Another heartache, another failed romance (and I did loved that chick of a maia, honest!)
On and on, does anybody know what we are living for?
I guess I'm learning (I'm learning learning learning, well, I do, don't I?)
I must be warmer now (hm, indeed, being fiery and whatnot)
I'll soon be turning (turning turning turning)
Round the corner now...

***GASP***

...sigh...


***THUD***


Er, it would seem that Priscilla Tolkien requires assistance. Assistance, please. (Cough) Ahem. I say. Excuse me, chap, could you lend a hand, there's a capital fellow-- hey! Drat it! Listen, bloke! There's a lady passed out here. Hey! Bloke!

Will SOMEBODY get the smelling salts!

[Glirdan]

One second, give me about o say, till the end of this Werewolf game and I'll get you those smelling salts. For now, everybody ignore the passed out body of Priscilla Tolkien.

[Glirdan]

On second thought, scratch that last post. I'll get you those smelling salts now. And don't worry, I won't bite.

Anyway, is there any other Balrog that I need to learn about? If so, post it here or PM. Again, I won't bite, I will bark however. I seem to be quite irritable since I got lynched.......

[THE Ka]

It's part of my civil duties as an eternally disgruntled human becoming to partake in the viewing of The Daily Show (with Jon Stewart. It's not his real name, but who's asking?) and The Colbert Report.

While watching The Colbert Report this wednesday, Steven Colbert was brave enough to snub CNN... again. This time, he stuct up for a cause more worthy than giving advice to O'Reilly or that crazy idea of making a fence across the entire southern border of the United States - No, Colbert stuck up for Balrogs!

CNN apparently 'researched' into the whole deal about the tradition of the '666' scare, using a picture of a Balrog as their backdrop for a devil. Colbert flew into the rescue and set the facts straight -

That picture was one of a Balrog, from the Lord of The Rings calendar from the 70's and not that of a devil-like creature.

He also was nice enough to explain that Balrogs should never be confused with the christian devil or any 'devil-like' creature, since they are completely different.

Or, as Mr. Colbert put it himself:

" 'devils' are angels who defy god, and follow the will of the devil. BALROGS - Balrogs are Maiar who defy Eru and follow the will of Morgoth. Completely different! Get the facts straight CNN!"


... I wag my finger at you CNN!

I believe that we should tip our hats to Mr. Colbert at The Colbert Report for his willing ability to set the facts straight. Also, possibly include him in any festivities of Balrogs appearing in the media, for the Balrog appreciation month?

Bravo Steven Colbert!

~ Ka

[The 1,000 Reader]

They look cool.

Yeah.