Lost in Translation

[the guy who be short]

There is a serious thread on translation here and a less serious one here.

Translation does amusing things to writing, so I thought we'd have a go ourselves. Here is a website where you type a phrase, and it is translated into French, then German, then French again, then back into English. The results are often... strange, to say the least. Often they can be funny.

The Barrow Wight rules the Downs and Downers becomes The Wight truck arranges niederwirft and Downers above.

But thou, Feanor Finwe's son, by thine oath art exiled. The lies of Melkor though shalt unlearn in bitterness becomes But thou, wire Feanor Finwes, thineeidkunst exiled. Lies of Melkor shaltunlearn certainly in the bitterness.

Feanor is a nutter, but Eomer's Scotch becomes * Feanor a nutter, however Scottish Eomers.

So... Feanor's a wire, The Barrow Wight's a truck. Interesting, isn't it?

Edit: Shelob's better link

[Holbytlass]

I put in "I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve!"-Bilbo

the result...

I do not know half of you half, as myself to want would have; and I can gain you smaller than half of you half, like.

[wilwarin538]

Three rings for the Elven-kings under the sky, seven for the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone, nine for Mortal Men doomed to die, one for the Dark Lord on his dark throne.

became.....

Three rings for Elven-Koenige under the sky, seven for the Lords of dwarf in their halls of the stone, nine for men of death condemned to die, for the dark Lord on its of the dark thrones.

haha

[HerenIstarion]

Another mistranlsation

[dancing spawn of ungoliant]

Looks like that thread HI linked is in a serious need of a "sweeping party".

After a little tour in Europe, Gollum had a new mantra: "My invaluable!" Did he learn a new word for preciouss or was there an inflation period?

Also, Saruman was widely known as a good speaker: "When you were it for me wished unnecessarily do not go men slain."
(If you go to war, needlessly, for I did not desire it, then men will be slain.)

[the guy who be short]

All that is gold does not glitter:

All, gold is, sparkles.

So, Tolkien was wrong then.

[Encaitare]

I translated Galadriel's song...

Original text: (it's from memory, so forgive me if a couple of words are off)

I sang of leaves, of leaves of gold, and leaves of gold there grew.
Of wind I sang, a wind there came, and in the branches blew.
Beyond the sun, beyond the moon, the foam is on the sea,
And by the strand of Ilmarin there grew a golden tree.
Beneath the stars of Ever-Eve in Eldamar it shone,
In Eldamar beside the walls of Elven Tirion.
There long the golden leaves have grown upon the branching years,
While here beyond the sundering seas now fall the Elven tears.
O Lorien! The winter comes, the bare and leafless day,
The leaves are falling in the stream, the river flows away.
O Lorien! Too long I have dwelt upon this hither shore,
And in a fading crown have twined the golden elanor.
But if of ships I now should sing, what ship would come to me?
What ship would bear me ever back across so wide a sea?

And the fascinating translation:

I sang leave, leave gold and leave gold am high for me there.
Wind, I, come there sang a wind, and in the establishments roasted.
Beyond the sun beyond the moon, the foam rubber on the sea is,
And by fibre of Ilmarin to raise a gilded tree.
Under stars of Ueberhaupt-Vorabends in Eldamar, it, shone
In Eldamar beside the walls of Elven Tirion.
There, gilded leaves a long time rose after the years ausbreitenen,
During here, beyond sundering of the seas you, fall now Elven breaks violently.
O Lorien! The winter comes, the simple one and leafless day,
leave being removed in electricity, the rivers of river.
O Lorien! I remained too a long time after this one of banks hither,
And in a crown fading twined gilded the elanor.
But, if ships I sing now, that the ship would come to me?
To which me a sea would carry indeed return here so far the ship?

[the guy who be short]

He was chased by wolves, lost in the forest, escaped in a barrel from the elf king's halls!
It was driven out by Woelfe, lost in the forest, gone ahead in a barrel of the halls of the king eleven!
So... Bilbo was apparently driven out by wolves, not chased. Presumably they got Bag End then. And why on earth was he at the front of a hall full of kings... in a barrel?

I sang leave, leave gold and leave gold am high for me there.

Galadriel's spent a little too long with Gollum, methinks.

Wind, I, come there sang a wind, and in the establishments roasted.

I know my school sure gets hot in the summer, I dread to think of what it's like in offices and such.

And by fibre of Ilmarin to raise a gilded tree.

An archaic meaning of gilded is "covered with blood" - I don't wanna get too near this Ilmarin fabric!

fall now Elven breaks violently

Holidaying Elves behaving violently? You'd think they were mortal Englishman.

[Firefoot]

I am a son Aragorn Elessar the morning called by Arathorn and, clay eleven, the heir to the Isildur son Elendils of Gondor. do you help me or to put to me in failure? choose quickly!

Now we know what Elfstones are really made of: eleven pieces of clay each.

He not corner, to leave Phasendrachen of your calculations.

From "It does not do to leave a live dragon out of your calculations."

And then, one that took a long time but proved well worth it: Gimli's song in Moria, except the last part of the last verse because the site stopped working for some reason on my browser before I could get to it.

The world was young, was however not seen
GebirgscGruen of mark on the world that
no word was put on electricity or the stone,
that like Durin only awoke and went.
It called the anonymous hills and those dells
and drank, however untasted wells
which it looked at stooped and in Mirrormere
and a crown of stars saw,
while invaluable stones after a wire
silver plated on the shade of its head to appear.

The world was, the mountains suitably which are high
the oldest days before the case.
Powerful kings of Nargothrond
and Gondolin which exceeded now far from
Sundering beyond the seas.
The world was suitable the day of Durins.

A king it was in circuit of the thrones carven
in much pillared halls of the stone
with the floor of money and roof and runes
gilded energy after the door.
There undimmed sunlight and star and the moon
striking in the brilliant lamps of the crystal
by the cloud or the color of the night
shown for measured there indeed and luminous.

There, the hammer smote on the anvil,
the eyelet of graver, wrote the engraver,
gave him the blade and a border was forged hilt
that those gained delvers, Masons established.
There blade beryl, pearl and Opal and metals
which as the post office of fish, buxler and corslet -,
of the bars of glare and axt-
and blade were étées wrought, put in Hoard.

Of Unwearied were then Durins people;
under the mountains, the music awoke.
Those harpers harped, sang those minstrels,
and by the barriers with schellten Trompeten.

The world is gray, the old mountains; Fire that forging mill is a cold ashen. No toothing-stone becomes, aucuns case of hammer, the stops of blackening in the halls Durins ausgeprgessen. A shadow lays upon his tomb

The best part has got to be the post office of the fish. After all, they have schools, so why not? And I had no idea that there was electricity in Middle-earth...

[Elrowen Tinúviel]

Well now, this is interesting!

The bow of Legolas was singing.
becomes: "The elbow of Legolas sang."

hmm... I never really thought of an elbow as particularly musical m'self.

Here's the end of Sam's song he sings in Mordor in ROTK:

I will not say the day is done,
nor bid the Stars farewell.

I do not say that the day takes place,
still offered departure the stars is.

what Samwise would think of that, I can only guess.

And the One Ring????
A ring aiming to lay out they a, a whole ring, to find it a ring, to take it all and in blackening bind them.

Eowyn's line "Begone, foul dwimmerlaik, lord of carrion! Leave the dead in peace!"
becomes: Begone, opposite with the rule dwimmerlaik, Lord carrion! leave deaths in peace!

I tried to do some more... but my internet connection is being fussy.
I hate dialup!

-Elrowen

[Shelob]

Since you all seem to be having fun with mistranslations here's a site called (appropriately enough) Lost in Translation ...this one takes an English phrase and runs it through this cycle:

English-->French
French-->English
English-->German
German-->English
English-->Italian
Italian-->English
English-->Portuguese
Portuguese-->English
English-->Spanish
Spanish-->English

10 different translations...with an option to add Chinese, Japanese, and Korean into the mix...

For Example the simple enough line "One Ring to Rule them all" ends up as "A cycle, to govern it everything" ...not quite the same...

if you're interested though the entire process looks like this:

Original English Text:
One ring to rule them all

Translated to French:
Une boucle pour les régner tous

Translated back to English:
A loop to reign them all

Translated to German:
Eine Schleife, zum zu regieren sie alle

Translated back to English:
A loop, to to govern it all

Translated to Italian:
Un ciclo, a governarlo tutto

Translated back to English:
A cycle, to govern it all

Translated to Portuguese:
Um ciclo, para governá-lo todo

Translated back to English:
A cycle, to govern it all

Translated to Spanish:
Un ciclo, gobernarlo todo

Translated back to English:
A cycle, to govern it everything

Hope it adds to the confusion of the translations.

[Alcarillo]

The feeding of the track goes of the door, that one that begins saldamente.

That is, using Shelob's wonderful translator:

The Road goes ever on and on
Down from the door where it began.

[wilwarin538]

my precious becomes inestimable mine and with the Chinese, Japanese and Korean its my important articles.

[The Saucepan Man]

Thought I'd try my current signature:

He had saucepans and kettles hung all over him, he wore a saucepan for a hat, and he crashed two saucepans together as he danced!

'Do you think he's dangerous?' said Joe, in a whisper.

Without Chinese, Japanes and Korean, it becomes the rather mystifying:

It had bathtubs and the boilers arrested it in all the part, took a bathtub to a protection that it protected and they analyzed it underneath two bathtubs, when to dance!

'The thoughts that are dangerous' the aforesaid Joe, within me whisper.

Add Chinese, Japanese and Korean and it becomes the wholly bamboozling:

Which you have it relative preoccupation of the POTENTIOMETER and by the supermarket for him ã... the effect of the POTENTIOMETER ã. The organization so that the decree of protection not to have, then he, he of the repairs of the protection danced such in the left in potentiometers of time 2 of the totality!

'He considers himself dangerous?' whisper a lower excessive Kiefer.

Who's this Kiefer?

[Elrowen Tinúviel]

That the messages of the south, the wind of Sighing or, in advance
obtain to the payment I to them to the day? Is Boromir the fair where
hour? Tarries and is betruebt.

once began as:

What news from the South, o sighing wind, do you bring to me at eve?
Where now is Boromir the Fair? He tarries and I grieve.

-Elrowen

[Shelob]

"Who's this Kiefer?" ~ The Saucepan Man (or should that be "Provide with personnel the POTENTIOMETER")


Well..."Kiefer" is the German word for either a 'Pine Tree' or a 'Jaw' (depends on whether it's feminine or masculine)...and looking at the translation-tree I'm going with 'Jaw'...though 'Pine Tree' would would have been far more entertaining...

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

Be he friend or foe, or seed defiled
Of Morgoth, Elf, or mortal child . . .

becomes

It is a friend or an enemy or the seed which is of Morgoth, of eleven or of the child of death defiled. (the dwarf's link)

and

Comfortable or hostile, or granulated it is decided to him of Morgoth,
eleven or the boy of inoperative women. (the spider's link)

and

Which if one worries the relative friend is the enemy or the Morgoth,
the dwarf or the chain to spill of å*�é ¹ absolutely that the advance
type of here. (ibid with Chinese, Japanese, and Korean)

Crazy. Imagine Fëanor and his sons saying stuff like that.

Noldor: Have you been smoking pipeweed again?!

[Alcarillo]

Gandalf's famous words:

"You cannot pass," he said. The orcs stood still, and a dead silence fell. "I am a servant of the Secret Fire, wielder of the flame of Anor. You cannot pass. The dark fire will not avail you, flame of Udûn. Go back to the Shadow! You cannot pass."

become (with Chinese, Japanese, and Korean):

" They cannot cross ",; it said. The Orcs of the positions
corrects for calmilo under the calm and inoperative women. " The
personal of the fire are, more when wielder the flame of the secret of
Anor. They we are not probably crosspieces. The end of the dark work
of the fire the objective of the flame, that one is used for Ud_n. It
enters the color! Not to the forms, it does not know the steps,
material they of "

which in turn becomes:

" They cannot cross ", ; it visualized that Orcs of the
positions for calmilo between the calm and the women to that
nonfunctioning recovers. " The team of the employees of the fire
is more if more when wielder, the flame of segretezza of Anor.
Crosspieces are not probably we them. The extremity of the dark work
of the fire the space of the training of the flame, this one is used
for Ud_n. The color writes! Not with the forms, it knows does not
become they, " of the physical dowry;

[Holbytlass]

Originally Posted by Elrowen Tinúviel

hmm... I never really thought of an elbow as particularly musical m'self.

They're not, they're comedic, you know, funny bone! har-har

This could develop into a rather funny game....

what's this originally?

good later part of I

[wilwarin538]

I tried my sig:

Your chances of getting hit by lightning go up if you stand under a tree, shake your fist at the sky, and yell "Storms suck!".

which became:

Their probabilities the end to take through the average screw of the
impressive lightning disappear to the expensive outpost, if you he he
are apprehensions under a tree, beat their fist with the sky and urlo
of suck!" of "donner the attack more also; in.

and with the extra three languages:

The effect and receives and the occasion of the material of " the
puntura not to shout outside that mien worries the battery; Juice, in
the order for dargli the attack also! If it is aspects arrested for
" of the use in Kinosita, the registries of the fist; It is.

Juice?!?

[Morsul the Dark]

you shall not PASS!

or more to the point, what i got was this nifty tidbit

They do not EXCEED!!

and for those that remember the morsul,gil-galad wars

Dark Wind and the elf king fought long on the downs and in the end dark wind lost **

is now

The dark wind and that the king eleven who is fought a long time, throw and in the dark wind of the end lost

**(putting the english translations in was too fix the fact the site diddnt know what was going on)

and one more

Boromir the disco king and legolas the elf pretty-boy took up arms against the crazed fan girls

Boromir that discokoenig and - legolas the young people took arms against those moves with made girls of ventilator

hehe

[Glirdan]

Using Shelob's site, old Tom Bombadill's first song that Frodo and Sam hear, which is:

Hey! Come merry dol! derry dol! My darling!
Light goes the weather-wind and the feathered starling.
Down along under Hill, shining in the sunlight,
Waiting on the doorstep for the cold starlight,
There my pretty lady is, River-woman's daughter,
Slender as the willow-wand, clearer than the water.
Old Tom Bombadil lilies bringing
Comes hopping home again. Can you hear him singing?
Hey! Come merry dol! derry dol! and merry-o,
Goldberry, Goldberry, merry yellow berry-o!
Poor old Willow-man, you tuck your roots away!
Tom's in a hurry now. Evening will follow day.
Tom's going home again water-lilies bringing.
Hey! Come derry dol! Can you hear me singing?

becomes (without the three extra languages):

Hé! The content of the thymus comes! Thymus derry! My person or thing
of the favorite! The light survives he Mitwind and the dumb Starling
the end of the work. Decree to lower the stature under the assemblies,
shining in the consideration of the sun, the cold the light of the
asterisks where the value of the initial end that is examinee, my to
break itself here graceful, of that one they fem he of the river of
the girls, dilue as the magical bar of the grass, pulitori like the
water. Old to obtain of the reading that of the water of the Bombadill
tone still jumps it comes to the house. You can mean them, in the
ordered order to sing? Hé! The content of the thymus comes! Thymus
derry! and therefore allegro of Goldberry, Goldberry, places the
allegro of yelloe! Old deficient wishing where the man, distant
rempliez he separated his roots! Intone on one hour of the connecting
rod. The night follows the day in the a marries to decree that
obtains, the one of goes innaffiare the reading you agiain of the Hé
tone! The thymus of Derry comes! You can mean them, the end to sing?

and with the three extras:

The content of the thymus comes! Thymus of Derry! My greater part of
the personal love! Which probably the wind of the behavior of
light/write interests the assemblies feather/spring and of the
Starling it disappears. Under the assembly that the cleaned interests
of the woman arrives, it has lucentezza of the cut in the information
entrance, light of the asterisks that obvious calm in the delay for
the point under examinación of fêz with the post ã. ã. 6á. with
the girl of the daily light of sig.ra von the Fluss of the water one
compares finally to something here. The old man ã. ã., of that one
giglio of the water of Bombadil has, arrives luppolo from the second
restorations nonupdated within enquérir of foam/home. if of latta a
so distant one how much, of that he stops to sing it? The content of
the thymus comes! Thymus of Derry! Rents of and Goldberry or or
allegro and allegro of yelloe of Goldberry! Old personnel to longone
of Willwo, progress of the sails! ã. ã. dulled the hour. The night
comes like result of the date. Giglio of the water of agiain that has
in ã. ã. is foam/home.! The thymus of Derry comes! when inner
enquérir if of latta one until, that the song?

Thymus? Luncentezza!?!? GIGLIO!?!?!?!?

[wilwarin538]

Old personnel to longone of Willwo

Ha Willwo, thats almost my name.

[The Elf-warrior]

My signature turns into: "But we must have energy, energy to order it all the things during us a will, for good those which see only the intelligent box."

[Glirdan]

Bilbo's last words to Gandalf at Bag End:

The Road goes ever on and on
Down from the door where it began.
Now far ahead the Road has gone,
And I must follow, if I can,
Pursuing it with eager feet,
Until it joins a larger way
Where many paths and errands meet.
And wither then? I cannot say.

without the three extra languages:

The way goes always indefinitely to the surface more under possible of
the door, where it began. To load for him is distant the way he to the
left in the front part and must follow, if the case and with alive
desires of the feet is continuous, until that one it does not connect
a greater method, where many ways he gather of the movement and the
operation. Défraîchissez of and then? I cannot say.

and with them:

The feeding of the track goes of the door, that one that begins
saldamente. To load for her is the feeding of the track is not going
to have directly to continue the switches and rifiniti, around to the
temporary one is enthusiastic he begun herzlichst of exijiu for many
ways of the movement and the feet of the conference of the instruction
to become him the connected thing new, to the food of the continuous
mines of the case that. Red color of E? That mine broad is not
interested with saying.

Sladmente, rifiniti, herrzlechst oh my!

Red color of E??? And what the heck is exijiu!?!?!?

[the guy who be short]

It had bathtubs and the boilers arrested it in all the part, took a bathtub to a protection that it protected and they analyzed it underneath two bathtubs, when to dance!

'The thoughts that are dangerous' the aforesaid Joe, within me whisper.

This one had me in stitches. It's one of those rare moments of brilliance that make me love these so much. A little scene played out in my head with SpM covered in bathtubs, and a small contingent of boilers (on legs) marching up and arresting him. And the end is so oddly philosophical looking.

TGWBS -> the type, that one is short
The Saucepan Man -> the man of the bathtub ()
The Barrow-Wight -> The Wheelbarrow Wight Wight
Eomer of the Rohirrim -> Eomer I gave Rohirrim
Feanor of the Peredhil -> Feanor I gave Peredhil
dancing spawn of ungoliant -> To the dance of usury ungoliant

[The Saucepan Man]

Here's a little game. You have to guess the famous Downers from the "translated" names below. Some are easy, some are difficult and some are downright obscure.

Some use the Japanes/Chinese/Korean function. Some do not. I chose whichever I liked best. One Downers is listed twice because both translations were so darned good.

Amon Rudh does not have the inhabitant of the permission

Potassio (full marks to anyone who gets this one)

Allegro of Otorinolaringoiatra (or this one ...)

Abundant available

Boy 7. Age

Only material Estel

Color of the Blaus I gave Evisse

Artilleryman I gave Amanaduial

Chain of Numenor

Housewife of the thunderclap of Sophia

Drink of the alcoholic one

Slandering (this is a good one)

Density of Morsul

Thymus of Guldur of the maintenance

[Kath]

Hmm let's have a quick go - these are all guesses so confirmation of any correct ones would be greatly appreciated!

Amon Rudh does not have the inhabitant of the permission - Squatter of Amon Rudh (sp?)

Allegro of Otorinolaringoiatra (or this one ...) - The Perky Ent

Boy 7. Age - Child of the 7th Age

Only material Estel - The Only Real Estel

Color of the Blaus I gave Evisse - Evisse the Blue

Artilleryman I gave Amanaduial - Amanaduial the Archer

Chain of Numenor - Son of Numenor

Housewife of the thunderclap of Sophia - Sophia the Thundermistress

Density of Morsul - Morsul the Dark

Thymus of Guldur of the maintenance - Keeper of Dol Guldur

I still can't work these out:
Drink of the alcoholic one

Slandering (this is a good one)

Abundant available

Potassio (full marks to anyone who gets this one)

[Shelob]

Amon Rudh does not have the inhabitant of the permission -- The Squatter of Amon Rudh (with Japanes/Chinese/Korean)

Boy 7. Age -- Child of the 7th Age (without Japanes/Chinese/Korean)

Density of Morsul -- Morsul the Dark (without Japanes/Chinese/Korean)

Chain of Numenor -- Son of Numenor (without Japanes/Chinese/Korean)



I've guessed at more but I want to leave others some to figure out (and can't be bothered to run them through the translation)..."Potassio" though, haven't a clue...but in retaliation for that I leave you with this "translated name"...

Rifle automatic of the art of Ritratto convinces otorinolaringoiatra completely

[The Saucepan Man]

All correct, Kath. Well done - particularly for guessing The Perky Ent.

Now, how about the remaining ones ...?

Btw, it occured to me on composing those that, if Sophia the Thunder Mistress were to marry Son of Numenor, they could call their son Thunderclap Numenor - and SoN could proudly declare that there was Something in the Heir.

(*groan* )

Edit: Correct too, Shelob. And that, if I am not mistaken, is The Perky Ent's translated name using the Japanese/Chinese/Korean function. Kind of fitting for an Ent, don't you think?

[Glirdan]

I can't for the life of me figure out whot he remaining onew belong to Saucy, great idea though.

I have a little Challenge myself. The following paragraph is the product of Shelob's translator, including the Chinese, Japanese and Korean languages.

EsIST is evaluated with this value! Until daresay he. With
the.great.number.of work that are sistemazione of the form and she are
evaluated. Stampini of E, that one that component evaluates with the
duration that is. It gives probably this one later one? It sketches
then the judgment of the inoperative women, attributed who herzlichst
polished exactly with much hour had only had the necessity for, of you
you would have that to being. All the care is not he tin-plates the
edge approximately one extremely imprudent one.
Can you guess what small scentences this is originally?

Glirdy

Ps. If you need a hint, just post or PM me.

[the guy who be short]

The Man of the Bathtub - perhaps a new thread should be created in Quizes or Quotes (or, more likely, dug up) for all your brainteasing needs?

[Shelob]

If you want I'll start one. We can call it "The conversion competes he with going"
(or "The Lost in Translation Game", once you un-translate it)...

[Alcarillo]

I put in

Alcarillo is an elf.

You could use any name, but I just used my own. With Chinese, Japanese, and Korean, I got

Alcarillo is a dwarf.

I wonder what some elves might think of that!

[the guy who be short]

This is quite handy for solving disputes too.

What is Tom Bombadil? Why, the answer is simple: That ã. ã is. Bombadil? Now we just need to figure out which ã. ã is being referred to and, indeed, what an ã. ã is.

Unfortunately, the website is of no further help. I asked What is an ã. ã? The answer was _. _ therefore is something. So, with the Tom Bombadil debate, just remember that Tom is an ã. ã and _. _ exists because of him.

Do balrogs have wings? becomes It is to a wing in balrogs?. Notice, to a wing, not just "a" wing. So that's a no.

Finally, should Fordim make more polls? This became It would have Fordim to more form of the elasticity to many of votings? I interpret this to mean yes, but with more "elasticity," that is, more varied polls.

[Firefoot]

The only thing that comes to mind for "Potassio" is Potatothan.

And "Slandering" is obloquy.

[The Saucepan Man]

Originally Posted by TGWBS

The Man of the Bathtub - perhaps a new thread should be created in Quizes or Quotes (or, more likely, dug up) for all your brainteasing needs?

Click on the link that HerenIstarion provided further up. I believe that the thread has been dormant for some time now, so anyone can pose a new question.

Originally Posted by Firefoot

And "Slandering" is obloquy.

Correct.

As for the remaining names, some hints:

Potassio came about, as I recall, via Potassium which I surmise was derived from its Chemical Symbol.

Abundant available and Drink of the alcoholic one are one and the same person. The "translations" actually make sense, given the meaning of this person's name.

[Alcarillo]

Perhaps Potassio is Ka? The symbol for potassium is K.

[arcticstorm]

Potassio is the Ka

eidt: cross posted with Alcarillo

[Shelob]

"I believe that the thread has been dormant for some time now, so anyone can pose a new question." ~Saucepan Man

I was in the process of starting a new thread but, due to the translator having problems *shakes fist at computer*, I'll just post there when I end up with a full translation...

(EDIT: I finally got a full translation, so that thread should be up and running again...please move the game section of this there and leave TGWBS's thread free for people with wildly amusing translations. "Thag you very buch" )

as for "Potassio" I was about to go looking into the idea that it came from potasium...having given up all hope that it had anything to do with potatoes...oh well, we must do our best to remember the wise advice of Douglas Adams:
"It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes."

I've tried "The Ka", but I just get "Ka" as the final translation...