Alert! Middle Earth Real Estate Scams

[Marileangorifurnimaluim]

This was posted some time ago, rather off-topic in another thread. Re-posted for your enjoyment.

WARNING!
A heads up for folks looking for Middle Earth property - there's a shady character or two out there selling lots in Numenor, Gondolin and Doriath.

The post-Ring War expansion has created a ripe market for some of these schemes.

I realize it's a long haul to see some of these places, but please, please, please, at least check a map before purchasing! None of these realms will show up on the BW's locator, and that's a good clue.

I have a very upset Dunlander family on my hands who showed up on Hobbiton expecting to find Gondolin. Hobbit law does have recourse for such shams, but it only applies to Hobbits born within the Shire. (If you're a Brandybuck, take note.)

In most places the rule is CAVEAT EMPTOR, let the buyer beware, but here's a review of local laws.

Rohan:
You have rights to persue restitution under the law of Rohan if you "be of just character and goodly mien.."

Mostly it means you can behead anyone who cheats you, and the court of Rohan will figure out later if they like and agree with your complaint - a quick process. Since the person most likely to complain is already dead, it works out. A good system, though not likely to get your money back.

Gondor:
Has a byzantine and complex legal system applying to "all acts committed within the current and former boundaries of the realm(s) of Numenor; by citizens and visitors of such realm(s); and all descendants of the high race of men, born within and without the current and former realm(s) of Numenor.." Whew!

This pretty much means everyone and everywhere, given the reach of old Numenor (the men of Far Harad for example are still considered citizens of Numenor). I think it also applies to fish swimming above the former island of Numenor. So long as you're not a dwarf, hobbit or full-elf (the half-elven are covered under this law), even if you commit your crime in another country - even if it was never part of the realms of Numenor at any time - you can appeal to Gondorian law. If your crime was committed in a former Gondorian territory, you are covered no matter what your race. This broad policy was enacted largely due to problems inherent in Elvish law (see below).

Sounds good, eh?

I don't recommend it. Not unless you have a lot of time, deep pockets, and a deep grudge.

This open policy has lead to a staggering backlog of cases. Graft has been reduced under King Elessar but still exists. I'm not sure that cracking down on the bribes was such a good idea, as this used to be the only way you could get a hearing in any decent amount of time. But whatever.

In the thousands of years of Gondor's existence, each king and steward passed a new set of laws, often with little regard to contradictions with previous laws. But due to Gondor's respect for tradition, these newer laws do not over-ride past law. In fact, the tendency is to respect older more out-of-date laws over the more recent (though this depends on the judge). This is a real problem when it comes to laws enacted by that wacko Ar-Pharazon, as any any animal rights activist in Gondor can tell you. The result of all this: there is a law both for and against everything, and it takes a very good ($$$$$) lawyer to locate the laws and interpretation of such laws to suit your needs.

Fortunately, this only applies to civil cases. Capital cases such as murder and treason are overseen personally by the King. Or Gondor would be a complete disaster.

By the way, for this reason do not apply Rohan-style criminal justice for civil offenses in Gondor. Your civil case will take forever, while their criminal case will be processed immediately. It brings little satisfaction to finally get your money back once you're in prison.

Elvish law:
Elvish law is uniform for the High Elves from one Elvish country to another, and only slightly different in Mirkwood, subject to the vagaries of the current king. They have had plenty of time to iron things out. Each case receives a personal, attentive and careful hearing by the head of that realm, Elrond or Galadriel as the case may be. It takes time, but given the wisdom of these ancient beings, the outcome is almost inevitably fair and well-considered. The problem is if you happen to be mortal. Elves are immortal, and time means nothing to them. Your hearing is likely to be 100-200 years in the future. (This is actually very wise, as the elves say most disputes given time will resolve themselves. In the case of mortals this is very true!) If you appeal, explaining you are mortal, it will be moved up to 20-30 years. They feel this is perfectly reasonable and will honestly not understand your impatience. While they will politely say they will consider moving it up sooner, there is no chance they will.

Shire law (though this culturally applies to any Hobbit population):
Most disputes in the Shire are solved "as between friends" or, if they are serious, in a meeting between the heads of each family.

Solicitors (as lawyers are called there, everything's different in the Shire) therefore have little to do outside of executing wills, marriage agreements and adoptions.

This has the unfortunate effect of your civil complaint being of great interest to any Hobbit Solicitor. They will draw out your case to its utmost length and complexity, including multiple hearings and personal meetings with the mayor, even if they are fully aware it is hopeless. This happened to my Dunland family. I wish they had come to me first.

Dwarvish law:
Nobody really knows. There was some legal understanding between the dwarves of Moria and the Elves of that region, and currently between the men of Dale and the King under the Mountain. But there is little historical record of the 'Great Khazadum Accord,' and the agreement with Dale boils down to: "..if the crime is committed on dwarvish territory, we will handle it. Thank you."

Dwarvish law, for those who've run afoul of it, appears to be arbitrary. Dwarves hint that their system was set down by Durin however, and is unchanged from that day.

Reports are that dwarves have little respect for any fool who has been financially cheated, (their attitude - the careless and stupid get what they deserve), and rule accordingly.

Interesting note: connections with dwarves of high-standing have proven to be actually detrimental to ones case, as wealthy dwarves do not wish their reputations to be tarnished by their friends' stupidity.

Mordor:
While technically bound by the law of Gondor, this is a frontier town. The reality is the law of the sword. Bring a weapon to back up your point, buy nothing that you can't verify... and don't drink the water!

Good luck, and happy house hunting!

If you would like any assistance in purchasing real estate, please PM me. [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

-Maril

[Mithadan]

Speaking as a member of the noble and time-honored legal profession and being well familiar with the laws and procedures of multiple jurisdictions, I find the foregoing criticism, nay diatribe, to be offensive to all men of "just character and goodly mien", namely the lawyers.

The legal systems of Rohan, Gondor and the Dwarvish and Elvish kingdoms (OK, The Shire is an anomaly) are well-established and governed by the constitutions of those nations and upheld by the authorities of their rulers. Well, Rohan doesn't have a constitution per se, having been established by the edict of the lawful Steward of Gondor and the pact between Cirion and Eorl, but it does, nonetheless, have a well-defined and structured body of jurisprudence.

Indeed the legal systems of the Elves and the Dwarves have been in place for several thousand years. The Elvish system of justice is based upon the Valinorean, in which a council deliberates all issues and judgments are pronounced by the doomsman, Mandos. Extraordinary cases are reserved to the exclusive jurisdiction of Iluvatar.

Similarly, the Elvish courts are overseen by duly appointed councils with a right of appeal to the king, regent or ruler of the realm. Cases involving treason or murder, like the Gondorian system, are exclusively within the jurisdiction of the king, regent or ruler. Attorneys are well-respected and wise. Saeros of Doriath is an example. Cases are handled efficiently by the judiciary by Elvish standards.

The Dwarvish system focuses primarily upon commercial matters with capital cases reserved to the king or ruler. A highly sophisticated system of contract interpretation has evolved there, and caveat emptor is resrved for those cases where the bargainers are foolish enough to seal a deal with a handshake and without witnesses. A prime example of this would be Thingol's deal with the Dwarves of Nogrod concerning the fashioning of the Nauglamir to hold the Silmaril. Unfortunately, both Dwarvish and Elvish courts accepted jurisdiction over this case and each reached a contrary decision which could not be enforced in the lands of either race without resulting in all out war...

The Gondorian system has been in existence since the founding of Numenor and has broad jurisdiction and powers. Local lords comprise the courts of first instance with right of appeal to the King or his ministers depending on the nature of the matter. Again, in Gondor, lawyers are honored and respected. Indicative of this is the insignia of membership in the Gondorian Bar; a sack of silver coins handing on a gold chain, with the size of the chain and sack indicating the attorney's years of practice.

In short, the scandalous and inflammatory statements of Marileangorifurnimaluim do not accurately reflect the honorable profession of the counsellor at law. A libel suit is now in preparation.

Lots in Gondolin, Numenor and Doriath are now sold out, however prime property in Nargothrond is now available.

[Anything but Arwen]

It has been brought to my attention that certain Estate Agents have apparently been scamming their customers. This is a severe offence, in every land of Middle Earth, and if proper action is not taken to stop this hoodwinking of trusting patrons, legal action will be taken.

In the meantime, for those who have claimed to have been tricked, and can prove they have nowhere to go, temporary housing arrangements have been created, situated in Edoras, Minas Tirith, Bree, and a small area of land between Mirkwood and Hithlaeglir has been kindly donated to the cause by the Beornings.

For more information, please contact the Chief of Home Affairs, in Gondor.