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Old 03-28-2002, 10:00 AM   #161
Haebrethiliel
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Sting

okay, i'm not really good at this, but i'm gonna try...

Frodo: The name is Baggins, Frodo Baggins. (pulls his little hobbitsword)

Frodo: (after he saw the eye) Wow, Sauron! I just looooove that mascara! Where did you get it?

Any Ork: look at this cute little Hobbits! Can I keep them, Sauron, please??????

Legolas: Oh rats, I broke another nail!

Gandalf: does this beard make me look old?

Arwen: (after she saw Aragorn) Is that my date? Ewwww... does he never wash his hair?

That' s all I could do, sorry! Hope ya like it!
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Old 03-28-2002, 05:31 PM   #162
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Boots

Gimli (upon beholding Galadriel): "Heh, guess you could say she took a nose-dive off the ugly tree and hit every branch coming down."

Shadowfax: "That's it, I'm knackered, and your wizardry butt is walkin' to Gondor as far as I'm concerned, be you Gandalf the White, the Grey, or the Red Hot Pink."

Saruman: "Mwahahaha!!! Betcha didn't know I had flood insurance!"
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Old 03-28-2002, 10:46 PM   #163
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Arwen to Aragorn: "Swagger it, swagger it, my little cock-o-whoop."

(Hey, it's canon!)
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Old 03-28-2002, 11:26 PM   #164
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Saruman: I shall fart in your general direction! now go, or i shall taunt you a second time!

Selob: I'm claustraphobic!

Sam to Gollum or Frod to Shelob: Bite Me.

Aragorn to the Witchking: You son of a mother less goat!

Witchking to Eowyn: Can I get your number? We should go out sometime. I know this real nice place between the dead and the living, real romantic and all. I think you'd like it...

Sauron: I never meant to hurt anyone, honest.

Gandalf ( in purple, with plungers on his head): There are no orcs in this valley! I'm tired, I'm hungry, and I need to go to the bathroom. This cloak is very constricting, I'm coming home now.
Radaghast: but the fate of Middle Earth rests in your... wizard staff.

mom: What do you want to be when you grow up sam?
Sam: a Sheriff.
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Be not conformed to this world, but be transformed, by the renewing of your mind.
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Old 03-29-2002, 04:21 PM   #165
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non_conformist13, hullo and welcome to the 'downs! Be sure an' pos lots!
Quote:
"There was a lot more," said Sam, "all about Mordor. I didn't learn that part, it gave me the shivers. "
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Old 03-29-2002, 04:23 PM   #166
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Quote:
Be sure an' pos lots!
Agh....I meant, "POST" lots!
Quote:
Sam refused to leave his master. He came and sat, curled up at Frodo's feet, where at last he nodded and closed his eyes.
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Old 03-29-2002, 06:15 PM   #167
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Boots

Frodo to the Eye of Sauron: "You lookin' at me? There ain't nobody else here, you must be lookin' at me."
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Old 03-30-2002, 12:30 PM   #168
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Celeborn to Galadriel: "That's it! I've had it with you, woman! Get back into the kitchen where you belong and take your stupid bowl with you!"

(hehe, we might be over 101 by now [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] )
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Old 03-30-2002, 02:44 PM   #169
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We may be.

Gaffer to Sam:
"Elves and Dragons? Boy, howdy, son, I wish I could go see them with you. I've got these boring cabbages and taters t' tend to, though.....
Quote:
LOTR (Movie) Moment (III) (Second Breakfast)
Pippin stops to cook
Aragorn says there's no time
Apple hits a head.

Copyright 2002 S. Uffelman
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Old 03-30-2002, 02:54 PM   #170
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Silmaril

quote-Legolas: Oh, a mirror!! Can I keep it, Auntie Galadriel, please!!!

nothing wrong with Legolas...he is perfecton!lol
could i just point somthing out...legolas does not carry a hair brush or anyting...right? then how come his hair is always perfect????
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Old 03-30-2002, 03:37 PM   #171
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He´s an ELF, that explains it all! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]
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Old 03-30-2002, 09:55 PM   #172
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well...thanks, i guess, i've actually been here for a while, but that's okay. you guys all have awesome names, especially Samwise, cause he's the best! and your right, Legolas's hair is always perfect, it's creepy.

and hello to everyone! espically people who know Mrs. Thrasher. (ha, now do you know who it is) anyway...

Gimili: "I feel a...love connection"

Gandalf: Oh! Ouch, that darned white flame burned my hand again... ooh that smarts!

Pippin: "oh, what's that? a pint, don't you think you should hold off a little, merry, no one likes a drunk you know..."

Aragorn: flowers are for wusses

[img]smilies/cool.gif[/img]
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"I can add some more if you like it, calling your Chief names, wishing to punch his Pimply Face, and thinking you Sheriffs look a lot of Tom-fools!" Samwise Gamgee

Be not conformed to this world, but be transformed, by the renewing of your mind.
Romans 12:2
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Old 03-30-2002, 10:15 PM   #173
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Stacey: (Samwise's alter-ego) Oooh. Don't tell him that, he might get a swelled head...
WHAT AM I SAYING!?!?! I'm talking about SAM...
Quote:
Sam: "What's the time? Is it today or tomorrow?"
(LOL! This sounds an awful lot like me when in my "human" form!!)
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Giving thanks unto the Father...In whom we have redemption through His blood, even the forgiveness of sins.~Colossians1:12a,14
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I am Samwise son of Hamfast, if by hoe or trowel I can get these weeds out of your garden, I will.You have my shears!;)
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Old 03-30-2002, 11:16 PM   #174
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Frodo is in the lair of Shelbob as he's holding Galadriel's phial: Ahhh! is that a dead fly? (he drops the phial) [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img]
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Old 03-31-2002, 12:00 AM   #175
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Quote:
I'm talking about SAM...
And we can dig it. [img]smilies/cool.gif[/img]
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Old 03-31-2002, 09:43 PM   #176
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Silmaril

Faramir: "Gimmi that ring, halfling!" *pushes Frodo over*

Frodo: "Bilbo, you know I hate poetry."

Gimli (to Legolas): "Oooh, goody, an elf! I've always wanted to meet one! What's your name? I just love your hair!"
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Old 04-01-2002, 12:02 AM   #177
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Silmaril

Eowyn to Witchking-GURLPOWERRRRRRRRRR!
Aragorn to Gandalf-may the pipeweed be with you
in sleep he sang to me
in dreams he came
that Eye that calls to me
and speaks my name

*I'm lame...and you Princess Bride people worry me!!! [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]*
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Old 04-01-2002, 12:52 AM   #178
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princess bride, monty python:search for the holy grail, and the three amigos rock!

Bilbo: on second thought, maybe i shouldn't have given frodo the ring, thereby bestowing the most horrible fate immaginale on him...

Legolas: shut-up you nitwits! i'm trying to listen to my MUSIC! drat, the batteries on my walkman ran out...

Sam: hey, mister frodo, when was the last time you washed your clothes? i'm afraid there's a bit of a stench, and it isn't my doing!

Gimili: oh! darn it! stubbed my toe on a stupid rock. who put this here anyway, it's quite dangerous, might as well just shoot me with an arrow than leave all these stones lying about!

Aragorn: i'm sorry gandalf, but could you take the lead for a while, i believe my allergies are starting to get at me.

Pippin: oh, no, gandalf! what an awful creature you are dealing with, that filthy balrog. wish i could do something, but i think we'll all just stand around in shock and watch you fall into the abyss.

gollum: sssssay PLEASSSSE SSSSSSSam, forss crying out loud, i'll gladly ssssshare with you, but we musssstn't forgetsssssss our mannerssssss, isssn't that rightsssss prescousssssssssssssss?
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"I can add some more if you like it, calling your Chief names, wishing to punch his Pimply Face, and thinking you Sheriffs look a lot of Tom-fools!" Samwise Gamgee

Be not conformed to this world, but be transformed, by the renewing of your mind.
Romans 12:2
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Old 04-01-2002, 01:59 AM   #179
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All you people are funnier than me... but...

Sam: Bah... we don't need to see the elves. Elves are losers.

Sauron (to Saruman, through the Palantir): Saruman, have you found the halfling? And... do you think I'm ugly? How come no one comes to visit me anymore? I feel like I have no friends. You're my friend, aren't you, Saruman?

Nazgul: You know, I'm getting tired of all this black... we should all go out and get tie-dyed t-shirts!

Witch-king: Eowyn, do you think we could ever be more than just friends?
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Old 04-01-2002, 03:45 AM   #180
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LOL [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

These are all great!! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

Sam: These pots and pans are way too heavy.. I think I'll just leave them here.

Sam (to Frodo): Come with you to Mordor?? No way!! *runs off in other direction*
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Old 04-01-2002, 06:04 AM   #181
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Aragorn: Legolas, you are too pretty to go with us to Mordor. You will miss your hair appointment and your hair will frizz up on the journey. Did you pack your hair dryer? Remember I want to use it too!

Legolas: Aragorn, you are probably right. I should not go on the trip to Mordor. I can not miss another hair appointment...my hair is such a fright as it is...and have you noticed? My roots are starting to show.

Frodo: But Legolas I was counting on you bringing your hair dryer so that I could blow dry my hair straight. You know it gets so curly in the mountain mist in the morning and I never know what to do with it. I never have a good hair day on the road.

Gandalf: Legolas, I was expecting you to bring your scissors so you could trim my hair and beard...and don't forget we have a hair appointment to color my hair and beard purple for next month's rock concert in Lothlorien. You promised....

Legolas: Yes Gandalf I know. But my roots are starting to show and I will miss another hair appointment if I go on the trip with you, Frodo, Aragorn and everyone else. If I don't keep this appointment, Sauron is going to think I became one of his soldiers and then where will we be? [img]smilies/rolleyes.gif[/img]
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Old 04-01-2002, 06:05 AM   #182
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Aragorn: Legolas, you are too pretty to go with us to Mordor. You will miss your hair appointment and your hair will frizz up on the journey. Did you pack your hair dryer? Remember I want to use it too!

Legolas: Aragorn, you are probably right. I should not go on the trip to Mordor. I can not miss another hair appointment...my hair is such a fright as it is...and have you noticed? My roots are starting to show.

Frodo: But Legolas I was counting on you bringing your hair dryer so that I could blow dry my hair straight. You know it gets so curly in the mountain mist in the morning and I never know what to do with it. I never have a good hair day on the road.

Gandalf: Legolas, I was expecting you to bring your scissors so you could trim my hair and beard...and don't forget we have a hair appointment to color my hair and beard purple for next month's rock concert in Lothlorien. You promised....

Legolas: Yes Gandalf I know. But my roots are starting to show and I will miss another hair appointment if I go on the trip with you, Frodo, Aragorn and everyone else. If I don't keep this appointment, Sauron is going to think I became one of his soldiers and then where will we be? [img]smilies/rolleyes.gif[/img]
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Old 04-01-2002, 03:33 PM   #183
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Eye

Quote:
Gandalf to Frodo: I'm not going to lie to you frodo every Man and Dwarf who fought a Nazgul has died. I've seen them punch through mithril. Elves have emptied entire quivers at them and hit nothing but air. Where they have failed you will succeed. There strength is based on wraith-world and because of that they will never be as strong or as fast as you can be.
Frodo: Are you saying I can dodge arrows?

Gandalf: I'm saying when the time comes you won't have to.

(this is only funny if you've seen The Matrix)
[img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] LOL that was probably the funniest one I've seen yet.
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Old 04-01-2002, 04:03 PM   #184
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Altariel, welcome from Bagshot Row! [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]
~your fireindly neighborhood gardener.
Quote:
'Yes, I am with you, Master,' said Sam...'And you're with me. And the journey's finished. But after coming all that way I don't want to give up yet. It's not like me, somehow, if you understand.'"
Sam Gamgee
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Old 04-01-2002, 04:21 PM   #185
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Eye

Ooh, just thought of something!

Saruman(to Treebeard after looking @ Orthanc) I love what you've done to the place! Will you be my interior decorator full-time?
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Consider the purr a variety of audible tranquilizer. [. . .] For a few of us, there is one more purr, a secret purr. When we combine our secret purrs, we produce the Purr of Power. And that is simply the amplified amity we feel as furred and purred beings.
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Old 04-01-2002, 07:08 PM   #186
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Aragorn: Mankind's outta gas, we're just circlin' the drain... (Sorry, was watching Titan A.E.)

Beorn to Gwaihir: So where's the wizard?

Gwaihir: Eh, that's where we hit a bit of a gray area...

Beorn *grabs Gwaihir's eye feathers*: You didn't get the wizard?!

Gwairhir: It wasn't my fault! There was this moth!... (Eh, saw Quest for Camelot recently, too.)
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Old 04-01-2002, 07:54 PM   #187
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Rosa??? Is that YOU??? [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img]
(Sorry, I'm in sort of a wierd mood today...)
Quote:
"Bill, my lad, you ought'nt to have took up with us. You could have stayed here and et the best hay till the new grass comes. "
~Sam Gamgee
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I am Samwise son of Hamfast, if by hoe or trowel I can get these weeds out of your garden, I will.You have my shears!;)
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Old 04-01-2002, 08:02 PM   #188
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(Back to the topic)
Sam (about Bill) That old nag?? What'n blazes do we wanna take HIM for?? What? ME lead 'im? No way, I ain't touchin' the flea-bitten beast."
(And I KNOW Sam wouldn't say this, 'cause I recently read what happened at the entrance to the Mines of Moria....*sniffle* [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img] --Why don't they have one of these little faces that's bawling!?!? )
Quote:
It was Sam who had insisted on choosing him, declaring that Bill (as he called him) would pine if he did not come.
"That animal can nearly talk," he said, "and would talk, if he stayed here much longer. He gave me a look as plain as Mr. Pippin could speak it: if you don't let me go with you, Sam, I'll follow on my own. "
[img]smilies/frown.gif[/img] [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img] [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img]
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I am Samwise son of Hamfast, if by hoe or trowel I can get these weeds out of your garden, I will.You have my shears!;)
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Old 04-01-2002, 08:04 PM   #189
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(Back to the topic)
Sam (about Bill) That old nag?? What'n blazes do we wanna take HIM for?? What? ME lead 'im? No way, I ain't touchin' the flea-bitten beast."
(And I KNOW Sam wouldn't say this, 'cause I recently read what happened at the entrance to the Mines of Moria....*sniffle* [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img] --Why don't they have one of these little faces that's bawling!?!? )
Quote:
It was Sam who had insisted on choosing him, declaring that Bill (as he called him) would pine if he did not come.
"That animal can nearly talk," he said, "and would talk, if he stayed here much longer. He gave me a look as plain as Mr. Pippin could speak it: if you don't let me go with you, Sam, I'll follow on my own. "
[img]smilies/frown.gif[/img] [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img] [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img]
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Giving thanks unto the Father...In whom we have redemption through His blood, even the forgiveness of sins.~Colossians1:12a,14
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I am Samwise son of Hamfast, if by hoe or trowel I can get these weeds out of your garden, I will.You have my shears!;)
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Old 04-01-2002, 08:06 PM   #190
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(Back to the topic)
Sam (about Bill) That old nag?? What'n blazes do we wanna take HIM for?? What? ME lead 'im? No way, I ain't touchin' the flea-bitten beast."
(And I KNOW Sam wouldn't say this, 'cause I recently read what happened at the entrance to the Mines of Moria....*sniffle* [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img] --Why don't they have one of these little faces that's bawling!?!? )
Quote:
It was Sam who had insisted on choosing him, declaring that Bill (as he called him) would pine if he did not come.
"That animal can nearly talk," he said, "and would talk, if he stayed here much longer. He gave me a look as plain as Mr. Pippin could speak it: if you don't let me go with you, Sam, I'll follow on my own. "
[img]smilies/frown.gif[/img] [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img] [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img]
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I am Samwise son of Hamfast, if by hoe or trowel I can get these weeds out of your garden, I will.You have my shears!;)
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Old 04-01-2002, 09:43 PM   #191
Elenya
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Silmaril

The crew at Helm's Deep (in unison):
War! Huh! What is it good for? Absolutely nothing! War! Huh! Sing it again!

The Fellowship:
We are Men! We're Men in Tights! (Tight Tights!)

Frodo turns to Sam at the top of the mountain at the end of the fellowship:
"Just the two of us! We can make it if we try! Just the two of us! You and I!"

The little French midget (from The Man with The Golden Gun) to Saruman:
The Ring! The Ring, Boss! The Ring!

Gandalf on Orthanc: Where's my Nimbus 2000 when I need it? All the other wizards have them! Except for Saruman, the lucky jerk; he got a Firebolt!


It's late and I'm tired, so I understand if you don't get them!
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Old 04-01-2002, 10:38 PM   #192
Kalimac
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Pipe

Hello, Rosa! Where on earth did you come from?

Elrond: Do you hear that sound, Mr. Witchking? It is the sound of inevitability. It is the sound of...your death.

The Ringwraiths: We are the Ringwraiths who don't do anything/We just stay at home and lie around! (Apologies to anyone who hasn't seen Veggie Tales at some point).

Sam: Mr. Frodo, you're so wrong it's not even funny.

Any Hobbit: Yes, I know exactly where we are! Geography was always my favorite class!

Arwen: Estel, I've decided to move back to Lothlorien. No, it's not like that at all! I had a great job offer there and, well, we'll be all right! We'll talk over the palantir every evening. You see, we both need the space.

Bilbo: Frankly, Frodo my lad, the best thing I ever did was bequeathing you that Ring. Pretty narrow shave for me there, huh?

Denethor: Whanne that Aprille with sweete shoures soote.
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Old 04-02-2002, 09:27 AM   #193
Nevtalathiel
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Silmaril

LOL everyone, they're really funny nad I coulndn't resist having a go myself, though they're probably not as good

Aragorn:Why do I have to have this old broken sword? I want a new one! *stamps foot, scowls nad goes off in a sulk*

Aragorn to frodo at the Prancing Pony:I really loved that disappearing trick, will you teach me how to do it?

Treebeard:We were quite glad to be rid of those ent-wives, they were SO annoying!

Galadriel at the hairdresser:Cut it off, cut it all off!

Gwaihir to Gandalf:No I don't want to carry you, you've got feet use them!
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Old 04-02-2002, 09:49 AM   #194
pippin_took0
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Sting

Aragorn (to Arwen): You can't give me this
Arwen: It is mine to give to- hey, you're right, it would be totally wasted on you

Legolas: Child of the 60s! Peace and love is the answer!

saruman: I give up. I'm going to get a REAL job.
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Old 04-02-2002, 09:58 AM   #195
pippin_took0
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Oooh I thought of more:

Aragorn (at Dimrill Dale): Well, Frodo and Sam have gone to Mordor, there's not much more we can do. I call it a day. Let's go home.

Gimli (about the mountain): Over it, under it, makes no difference to me!

Galadriel: will you look into my birdbath?

Galadriel: INSTEAD OF A DARK LORD YOU SHALL HAVE- Oh, actually, I don't think so. Green's not really my colour

Haldir: How did you creep up on us like that?

Galadriel (when offered the Ring): Rings of power? They are SO last age!

frodo: Sam, Gandalf said I should take someone I trust with me to Mordor. Come on Boromir, are you realy yet?
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Old 04-02-2002, 10:28 AM   #196
Perethil
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Sting

legolas: keep that doobie going!

nazgul: i come in peace

aragorn: No time for the old in-out, love. I've just come to read the meter.

thorin oakenshield: u know, sometimes i think, what is all this gold truly FOR?

sam: master frodo, you know i love you very much, but im just... not into that kind of thing.

sauron: ring, shming, im tired of all this.

gandalf: (after being offered some pipe weed) no thanks! ill go without!

bilbo: u know, sometimes i remember that whole lonely mountain thing, and i just think: what an utter waste of time!

Manwe: the elves and men are suffering for nothing! let us help them!

frodo: strider, take a BATH!!
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Old 04-03-2002, 02:54 AM   #197
pippin_took0
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Silmaril

Here's another one I thought of last night while I was falling asleep, so if you don't get it, I'm not really surprised; insomnia doesn't make for the best sense of humour.

Saruman in the scouring of the Shire: Welcome home my dear halfling friends, I hope your journey was good. I've taken every care to ensure that the Shire is just as you left it, if not better!
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Old 04-03-2002, 04:01 AM   #198
Menewilwarin of Mirkwood
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These are so very very good - here is my humble attempt...

Bill, Tom or Bert (the trolls): say, why don't we let these dwarves go, i mean i'm really really full now... [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
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Old 04-03-2002, 11:34 AM   #199
Samwise
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White-Hand

Menewilwarin an' Perithil, hullo!
~your friendly neighborhood gardener.
Quote:
"You'd better be hidden, Mr. Frodo." said Sam. "We'll send this rider to the rightabouts! "
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Giving thanks unto the Father...In whom we have redemption through His blood, even the forgiveness of sins.~Colossians1:12a,14
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I am Samwise son of Hamfast, if by hoe or trowel I can get these weeds out of your garden, I will.You have my shears!;)
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Old 04-03-2002, 01:25 PM   #200
Nuranar
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Quote:
Gandalf ( in purple, with plungers on his head): There are no orcs in this valley! I'm tired, I'm hungry, and I need to go to the bathroom. This cloak is very constricting, I'm coming home now.
Radaghast: but the fate of Middle Earth rests in your... wizard staff.
Quote:
The Ringwraiths: We are the Ringwraiths who don't do anything/We just stay at home and lie around! (Apologies to anyone who hasn't seen Veggie Tales at some point).
non_conformist13 and Kalimac, you rock! VeggieTales is the greatest!!
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