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Helkahothion · 05-11-2003, 05:54 AM

Legolas: Welcome to ME news. Today:
-Aragorn shaves
-Elves of Mirkwood are mad because of the lack of housing. They demand larger trees.
-The new wall of Minas Tirith is done. But it seems that Aragron has refused to pay the dwarves. He claims they offered their help freely.
-ME stocks are rising due to the downfall of Mordor. The market is flooded with cheap stocks.
-The fameous Frodo reports from Valinor in our fameous program: Greetings from the undying lands
-The Haradhrim got checked by the IRS and it appeared that they have been evading major costs on cave safety. Most of the houses must be closed down.

Okay here is the deal. You are the reporters. Work out these newsflashes. After these are done I will make new ones.

Greetings,

The ME news director

***The Barrow-Wight*** · 05-11-2003, 07:30 AM

Just so you know, this is another of those 'list' topics that we really discourage. It will generate post after post of similar lists with no real substance. If you want this post to succeed, I recommend dropping the 'flash' part and changing it to 'story'. A short, one-paragraph, well-thought-out news story would be so much more entertaining and might lessen the number of empty posts we typically see on these type of topics. If people have to put a little effort and thought into their posts, some of them might actually be funny.

ElentariGreenleaf · 05-14-2003, 07:13 AM

Studio Reporter: Welcome to today's news. Latest reports show that Pippin is being punished for being a "fool of a took". We now go there live.

Repoter in Rohan: Thankyou, Brian. Yes, I am now here with Gandalf, a so far respected Maia, but who seems to be holding Pippin upside-down on the top of Orthanc. I am now being Eagle lifted to the scene. *gets put on roof* Mr Gandalf, Sir. Why is it you are holding Pippin upside-down, threatening to "end his pathetic existance"?

Gandalf: I have had enough of his foolish actions. Just this morning he used the Palantir, again. He was pulling a practical joke on Sauron.

Pipin: HAHAH! Yeah, it was a good one: "Hello, can I speak to I.P. Freely please?" Sauron ACTUALLY fell for it...

Reporter: We will come back to this story as soon as it is 6pm, and Elentari can get back online. Back to the Studio...

polices · 05-25-2003, 03:54 PM

We interrupt your regularly scheduled broduction to bring you a special news update!

On amon-hen there is a great ruckass over who knows what. But reports are coming in there are fatalitys, now we go to our "on the spot" reporter denethor, Denethor?

Denethor: It appeares a newbreed of orcs are attacking the famous fellowship! Police are helpless in there attempts to stop the slaughter! Current fatalitys:
Good-guys: 1
Bad-guys: a lot [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]

Arawethiel · 05-25-2003, 08:06 PM

Greetings viewers! I am Arawethiel on special report from the royal palace in Minas Tirith where it appears that some sort of castrophe has happened to the king. I come to you live with an eye witness account on the disastor. Arwen could you please tell the viewers what you saw.

Arwen: It was incredible! In all my years I have never seen such a sight as this, but today when I went to the throne room I was shocked by what had happened to Aragorn!

Arawethiel: Was he wounded? Has someone tried to assasinate the king?

Arwen: Oh no! It was not so horrible as that! Aragorn's scruffy beard has been shaved off!!! I could not believe my eyes! He sweared he would never shave off the horrid thing no matter how many times I asked him. You think he would pay more attention to the elf maiden that sacrificed her immortality for him!

Arawethiel: Oh my! This is a serious blow to the king! But if he did not want to shave it off how did this happen?

Arwen: Well, I believe it was a prank pulled by a certain hobbit Gandalf is now hanging off of Orthanc. Aragorn is mightily miffed that Gandalf got to him first.

Arawethiel: Oh, I see. Well, I hope the king recovers soon from the loss of his cherished beard.

Arwen: Hah! If I have my way that thing is never coming back!! It scratches and all sorts of things get caught in it! You would think he was a dwarf the way he loved that thing!

Arawethiel creeps away from the ranting Arwen.

Arawethiel: Well, there you have the latest from the palace in Minas Tirith. Tune in later tonight for more details on the king's facial hair recovery.

[ May 25, 2003: Message edited by: Arawethiel ]

Helkahothion · 05-27-2003, 05:23 AM

Host:Thank you Arawethiel.

Now back to the caves of the Haradrhim. After a raid by the IRS it appeared that the humans have been evasing tax and did not polish the Stalagmites in the cave. This resulting in rough and rugged pieces of stone on which the children can damage themselves pretty bad. They used the money up in the war against Minas Tirith. King Aragorn has placed them under financiel order. The humans are not allowed to do their own shopping from now and get punished by a diet of salad only.

Untill further notice will they stay under this regime untill their debts have been payed off.

And now for a special report about the Rising stocks due the downfall of Mordor, here is...................

Suilad,

Anuion

Finwe · 05-27-2003, 08:00 PM

Here is Finwë, reporting live from Minas Tirith.

Finwë: I am reporting here from the Finance Council Chamber, the home of the Middle-earth Stock Exchange. The Re-United Kingdom (RUK) national average has dropped 20 points, resulting in a slump covering all of Eriador. I am speaking to King Aragorn of Minas Tirith, the official Head of the Finance Council. Your Majesty, what do you have to say about these shocking events?

Aragorn: *shaking his head* Well, I kept telling Arwen to stop buying up land in Mordor. But she seems to have this fool notion that Mordor can be made green and flourishing again. Women! *he throws his hands up and walks off*

Finwë: And now, through PalantirVision, we shall talk to Mayor Samwise Gamgee, Head of the Shire. Mayor Gamgee, how do you feel about these plunging stocks? How are they affecting the Shire?

Samwise: Well, seein's how the wife cautioned me 'gainst buyin' land in Mordor, it didn't hit me person'lly. But I do say that some gentlehobbits here have been ser'usly 'ffected by the fallin' stocks. Why just the other day, I saw Pimpernel Took wheelin' her belongin's to her brother's house, since hers was lost.

Finwë: Most unfortunate events to be sure. And now back to the gates of Minas Tirith where a large group of Dwarves is waving signs that say, "Dwarven Rights," "Stop Aping Thingol," and "Equal Rights for Dwarves."

05-11-2003, 05:54 AM	#1
Helkahothion Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: The inside of Legolas' lungs Posts: 1,005	Welcome to ME news Legolas: Welcome to ME news. Today: -Aragorn shaves -Elves of Mirkwood are mad because of the lack of housing. They demand larger trees. -The new wall of Minas Tirith is done. But it seems that Aragron has refused to pay the dwarves. He claims they offered their help freely. -ME stocks are rising due to the downfall of Mordor. The market is flooded with cheap stocks. -The fameous Frodo reports from Valinor in our fameous program: Greetings from the undying lands -The Haradhrim got checked by the IRS and it appeared that they have been evading major costs on cave safety. Most of the houses must be closed down. Okay here is the deal. You are the reporters. Work out these newsflashes. After these are done I will make new ones. Greetings, The ME news director

05-11-2003, 07:30 AM	#2
*The Barrow-Wight* Night In Wight Satin Join Date: May 2000 Posts: 4,043	Just so you know, this is another of those 'list' topics that we really discourage. It will generate post after post of similar lists with no real substance. If you want this post to succeed, I recommend dropping the 'flash' part and changing it to 'story'. A short, one-paragraph, well-thought-out news story would be so much more entertaining and might lessen the number of empty posts we typically see on these type of topics. If people have to put a little effort and thought into their posts, some of them might actually be funny. __________________ The Barrow-Wight

05-14-2003, 07:13 AM	#3
ElentariGreenleaf Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Look, I'm over there! Posts: 496	Studio Reporter: Welcome to today's news. Latest reports show that Pippin is being punished for being a "fool of a took". We now go there live. Repoter in Rohan: Thankyou, Brian. Yes, I am now here with Gandalf, a so far respected Maia, but who seems to be holding Pippin upside-down on the top of Orthanc. I am now being Eagle lifted to the scene. gets put on roof Mr Gandalf, Sir. Why is it you are holding Pippin upside-down, threatening to "end his pathetic existance"? Gandalf: I have had enough of his foolish actions. Just this morning he used the Palantir, again. He was pulling a practical joke on Sauron. Pipin: HAHAH! Yeah, it was a good one: "Hello, can I speak to I.P. Freely please?" Sauron ACTUALLY fell for it... Reporter: We will come back to this story as soon as it is 6pm, and Elentari can get back online. Back to the Studio... __________________ There is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot. Website\|Art

05-25-2003, 03:54 PM	#4
polices Animated Skeleton Join Date: May 2003 Location: a little place called "Stuck in a pot" Posts: 48	We interrupt your regularly scheduled broduction to bring you a special news update! On amon-hen there is a great ruckass over who knows what. But reports are coming in there are fatalitys, now we go to our "on the spot" reporter denethor, Denethor? Denethor: It appeares a newbreed of orcs are attacking the famous fellowship! Police are helpless in there attempts to stop the slaughter! Current fatalitys: Good-guys: 1 Bad-guys: a lot [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img] __________________ "The time of the elfs has ended."Elrond "It is also the end of the men..."ME! "It is the time of the... SUPER-ROBOTIC-FLYING-GENETICALLY-MODIFIED-SUPER-DARVES!"

05-25-2003, 08:06 PM	#5
Arawethiel Animated Skeleton Join Date: Apr 2003 Posts: 45	Greetings viewers! I am Arawethiel on special report from the royal palace in Minas Tirith where it appears that some sort of castrophe has happened to the king. I come to you live with an eye witness account on the disastor. Arwen could you please tell the viewers what you saw. Arwen: It was incredible! In all my years I have never seen such a sight as this, but today when I went to the throne room I was shocked by what had happened to Aragorn! Arawethiel: Was he wounded? Has someone tried to assasinate the king? Arwen: Oh no! It was not so horrible as that! Aragorn's scruffy beard has been shaved off!!! I could not believe my eyes! He sweared he would never shave off the horrid thing no matter how many times I asked him. You think he would pay more attention to the elf maiden that sacrificed her immortality for him! Arawethiel: Oh my! This is a serious blow to the king! But if he did not want to shave it off how did this happen? Arwen: Well, I believe it was a prank pulled by a certain hobbit Gandalf is now hanging off of Orthanc. Aragorn is mightily miffed that Gandalf got to him first. Arawethiel: Oh, I see. Well, I hope the king recovers soon from the loss of his cherished beard. Arwen: Hah! If I have my way that thing is never coming back!! It scratches and all sorts of things get caught in it! You would think he was a dwarf the way he loved that thing! Arawethiel creeps away from the ranting Arwen. Arawethiel: Well, there you have the latest from the palace in Minas Tirith. Tune in later tonight for more details on the king's facial hair recovery. [ May 25, 2003: Message edited by: Arawethiel ] __________________ "If I say he is a Burglar, a Burglar he is, or will be when the time comes." Gandalf sticking it to the Dwarves.

05-27-2003, 05:23 AM	#6
Helkahothion Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: The inside of Legolas' lungs Posts: 1,005	Host:Thank you Arawethiel. Now back to the caves of the Haradrhim. After a raid by the IRS it appeared that the humans have been evasing tax and did not polish the Stalagmites in the cave. This resulting in rough and rugged pieces of stone on which the children can damage themselves pretty bad. They used the money up in the war against Minas Tirith. King Aragorn has placed them under financiel order. The humans are not allowed to do their own shopping from now and get punished by a diet of salad only. Untill further notice will they stay under this regime untill their debts have been payed off. And now for a special report about the Rising stocks due the downfall of Mordor, here is................... Suilad, Anuion

05-27-2003, 08:00 PM	#7
Finwe Deathless Sun Join Date: May 2003 Location: The Royal Suite in the Halls of Mandos Posts: 2,609	Here is Finwë, reporting live from Minas Tirith. Finwë: I am reporting here from the Finance Council Chamber, the home of the Middle-earth Stock Exchange. The Re-United Kingdom (RUK) national average has dropped 20 points, resulting in a slump covering all of Eriador. I am speaking to King Aragorn of Minas Tirith, the official Head of the Finance Council. Your Majesty, what do you have to say about these shocking events? Aragorn: shaking his head Well, I kept telling Arwen to stop buying up land in Mordor. But she seems to have this fool notion that Mordor can be made green and flourishing again. Women! he throws his hands up and walks off Finwë: And now, through PalantirVision, we shall talk to Mayor Samwise Gamgee, Head of the Shire. Mayor Gamgee, how do you feel about these plunging stocks? How are they affecting the Shire? Samwise: Well, seein's how the wife cautioned me 'gainst buyin' land in Mordor, it didn't hit me person'lly. But I do say that some gentlehobbits here have been ser'usly 'ffected by the fallin' stocks. Why just the other day, I saw Pimpernel Took wheelin' her belongin's to her brother's house, since hers was lost. Finwë: Most unfortunate events to be sure. And now back to the gates of Minas Tirith where a large group of Dwarves is waving signs that say, "Dwarven Rights," "Stop Aping Thingol," and "Equal Rights for Dwarves." __________________ But Melkor also was there, and he came to the house of Fëanor, and there he slew Finwë King of the Noldor before his doors, and spilled the first blood in the Blessed Realm; for Finwë alone had not fled from the horror of the Dark.

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