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Visit The *EVEN NEWER* Barrow-Downs Photo Page |
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11-22-2002, 07:52 PM
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#1 |
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Stormdancer of Doom
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Elvish singing is not a thing to miss, in June under the stars
Posts: 4,349
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old saws
Any old saw will do, but let's start with:
Why did the chicken cross the road? ... Aragorn: Let the guide go first, if you have one. Saruman: He comes to Isengard seeking My Counsel. Boromir: It was a plain road, though it led through a hedge of thorns. Eowyn: More than anything else he feared a cage. Bilbo: The road goes ever on... Frodo: The chicken could have waited til Bilbo's birthday before he set off. Sam: Chicken and Chips by S. Gamgee-- you couldn't say no to that. Gollum: Give me chicken now, and keep nassty chips.
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...down to the water to see the elves dance and sing upon the midsummer's eve. |
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11-22-2002, 08:00 PM
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#2 |
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Princess of Skwerlz
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: where the Sea is eastwards (WtR: 6060 miles)
Posts: 7,500
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(Reference material for those excellent answers: The Chicken)
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'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...' |
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11-22-2002, 08:42 PM
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#3 |
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Princess of Skwerlz
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: where the Sea is eastwards (WtR: 6060 miles)
Posts: 7,500
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No reason to delete this - it's a great idea that goes in quite a different direction. I just thought you'd enjoy reading that thread! Actually, it could go in Mayhem...
Anyway, I will try to add here as soon as I think of something good!
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'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...' |
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11-22-2002, 09:07 PM
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#4 |
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Stormdancer of Doom
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Elvish singing is not a thing to miss, in June under the stars
Posts: 4,349
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Okay. Here's a few more for Why did the chicken cross the road:
Barliman: He's one o' them rangers. Merry: I have seen them, Frodo! I have seen the black chickens! Legolas: Ai! Ai! A chicken! A chicken is come! Gandalf: A chicken... what an evil fortune. And I am already weary. Celeborn: Tell me, where is the chicken, for I greatly desire to speak with him. Aragorn (or Galadriel): He has fallen into Shadow... Eomer: To learn courtesy under the loving strokes of a dwarf's axe... [ November 22, 2002: Message edited by: mark12_30 ]
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...down to the water to see the elves dance and sing upon the midsummer's eve. |
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11-22-2002, 10:38 PM
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#5 |
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Pile O'Bones
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: out of NOWHERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posts: 18
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lol these have really been funny, Mark12! I especially like Celeborn's!!!!
Here's just a few I could come up with, they're not quite as funny though: Why did the chicken cross the road? Sam: "He wanted to see the elves!" Haldir (in a very solemn voice): "The Lady of the Wood was expecting him." Saruman: "Sauron wanted him to build an army worthy of Mordor." Gimli: "He didn't want to pass through the mines of Moria." The rest of these don't really answer the question but just thought I'd post 'em anyway!!! [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img] Ringwraith: "Give up the chicken, She Elf!" Strider: "Chickens from Dunland! Hide!" Boromir: "One does not simply want into Mordor. Its' Black Gates are guarded by more than just orcs. There are chickens there that do not sleep!!!!" Saruman: "Moria! You fear to go into those mines. The dwarves delved too greedily and too deep. You know what they awoke in the deep places: shadow and CHICKENS!" "Saruman: "Hunt them down! You do not know pain; you do not know fear! You shall taste fried chicken!" [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img] [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img] [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img] [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img] [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]
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"Come back! Come back! To Mordor we will take you!" --Ringwraiths to Frodo |
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11-23-2002, 03:28 PM
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#6 |
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Shade of Carn Dûm
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: next to the fire keeping warm
Posts: 471
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oh my gosh, I've tasted fried chicken! [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img] Does that make me an Uruk-hai?! HaHa that was great. Let's see....
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Just because a person has the right to do something doesn't make it the right thing to do. |
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11-23-2002, 04:16 PM
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#7 |
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Candle of the Marshes
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Flyover Country
Posts: 780
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Wow, these are good. I don't think we'll be changing saws for a while [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img].
Eowyn: It wished to cross another road. But it desired no man's pity. Faramir: Do not scorn the chicken that is the gift of a gentle heart. Ugluk: Because I, Ugluk, commanded it. Gandalf: The chicken crossed the road? Then he has indeed left the path of wisdom. Bilbo: To get away from the Sackville-Bagginses! Sorry, these are kind of lame. Ah well.
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Father, dear Father, if you see fit, We'll send my love to college for one year yet Tie blue ribbons all about his head, To let the ladies know that he's married. |
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11-23-2002, 05:29 PM
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#8 |
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Eidolon of a Took
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: my own private fantasy world
Posts: 3,460
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This is really funny! I like the different answers for the "old saw" but some of these (i.e. the ones that don't answer the question but insert chicken in somehow) fit in with another thread, the Argyle Socks!!!! thread. It hasn't had a new word in a while.
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All shall be rather fond of me and suffer from mild depression. |
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11-23-2002, 06:43 PM
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#9 |
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Stormdancer of Doom
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Elvish singing is not a thing to miss, in June under the stars
Posts: 4,349
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Why did the chicken cross the road...
Movie Pippin: Because we need someone with intelligence on this mission... quest... thing. Farmer Maggot: Because he's been in my crops! (waving scythe) Movie Frodo: I think he should get out of the road... get out of the road! Book Pippin: Ho Ho Ho, to the bottle he goes... Elrond: He may find friends upon his way when he least looks for it.
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...down to the water to see the elves dance and sing upon the midsummer's eve. |
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11-24-2002, 01:26 PM
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#10 |
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Eidolon of a Took
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: my own private fantasy world
Posts: 3,460
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Why did the chicken cross the road?
Movie Aragorn: Because he was tracking a band of Uruk-hai westward across the plains. Tom Bombadil: Because I told him to, derry dol. Movie Arwen: Because he wanted Frodo, and had to come and claim him. Gandalf: Because he was meant to cross the road. Thorin: Because he must away ere break of day. Boromir: Because he had a riddle that needed answering. He dreamed that a giant wave engulfed his chiken coop, and a voice clucked, "Seek for the egg that was broken, across the road it lies."
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All shall be rather fond of me and suffer from mild depression. |
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03-26-2004, 03:18 PM
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#11 |
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Stormdancer of Doom
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Elvish singing is not a thing to miss, in June under the stars
Posts: 4,349
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more on the chicken theme
Arwen: Because there is now no ship that will carry him hence.
Movie Elrond: He is dying- the chicken is dying. His life-force is tied to the road. Gimli-- A chicken will go underground and a dwarf dare not? Denethor: Chicken! Abandon your post and flee for your life!
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...down to the water to see the elves dance and sing upon the midsummer's eve. |
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03-26-2004, 05:09 PM
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#12 | |
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Wight
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: A portal to an alternate dimension at your local Wal-Mart store.
Posts: 161
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Quote:
Bilbo:Because he didn't know half of us half as well as he would've liked, and he liked less than half of us half as well as we deserved! Gandalf:Because he was a fool of a chick! Galadriel:Even the wisest cannot tell; for a chicken does many things. Peace, Vuelve
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Now, what do you own the world? How do you own disorder? Disorder! - Toxicity-System of A Down |
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03-27-2004, 08:46 AM
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#13 | |
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Shade of Carn Dûm
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: in the cookie jar
Posts: 256
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Quote:
Gimli: Well then, he was wasted on crossing roads. Those chickens are natural born sprinters! Legolas: He has gone to fetch the sun. (hmm, i forget the actual quote, close enough) Nazgul: Foolish chicken! He can cross the road, but we will never stop hunting him.
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"Let me handle this, I'm British." ~hitchhikers guide |
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03-27-2004, 01:11 PM
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#14 |
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Illusionary Holbytla
Join Date: Dec 2003
Posts: 7,547
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These are great!
Nazgûl: The Ring draws it. Ghân-buri-Ghân: He went to drive away bad air with bright iron beak. Barliman Butterbur: Chickens? Now what does that remind me of? Bilbo: It's a dangerous business for chickens to be crossing roads. |
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