Sex Amongst the Maiar (and the Other Beings in Arda)

[TheGreatElvenWarrior]

This is just a little awkward for me to write, but I will anyway. It begs to be discussed. On Aganzir's hair colour thread I accidentally pulled the entire thread off-topic with one sentence. It was this:

I will continue to imagine Sauron as an asexual being.

That ended up sparking these comments:

Originally Posted by Faramir Jones

TheGreatElvenWarrior, you made an interesting assumption about Sauron being an 'asexual being'. Would you think the same thing applied to the Ringwraiths, after they became wraiths? Perhaps these were actual topics of debate among loremasters in Middle-earth.

On a more down to earth level, I've thought that if Gondorian soldiers were more like those of WWI and WWII, they would have asked the Nazgul, and in particular their leader, about when they were last sexually active. Also, the Ringwraiths would be asked about their Dark Lord, about whether he had certain organs, and if he ever used them, or if they were just for decoration.

Originally Posted by Aganzir

We know Morgoth wasn't asexual though, the way he fantasizes about Lúthien is quite a give away. And why would the Valar go through the trouble of getting married if they were asexual? We also know of Maia crushes, such as Tilion who kept drooling after Arien even after she said no.

Originally Posted by Faramir Jones

Aganzir, you said here: 'We also know of Maia crushes, such as Tilion who kept drooling after Arien even after she said no'. I'd rather call it an obsession; but then Arien would certainly be called 'hot':

Too bright were the eyes of Arien for even the Eldar to look on, and leaving Valinor she forsook the form and raiment which like the Valar she had worn there, and she was as a naked flame, terrible in the fullness of her splendour. (The Silmarillion, (London: Unwin Paperbacks, 1979), Chapter 11, p. 117)

Tilion is literally burnt by his obsession:

But Tilion was wayward and uncertain in speed, and held not to his appointed path; and he sought to come near to Arien, being drawn by her splendour, though the flame of Anar scorched him, and the island of the Moon was darkened. (Ibid., p. 118)(My italics)

An interesting variation on the person who plays with fire. He still hasn't learnt his lesson, though:

But Tilion went with uncertain pace, as yet he does, and was still drawn towards Arien, as he shall ever be; so that often both may be seen above the Earth together, or at times it will chance that he comes so nigh that his shadow cuts off her brightness and there is a darkness amid the day. (Ibid., p. 119)(My italics)

Since I started this discussion, I thought that I would actually put it in its own thread, since I don't want to be responsible for skwerlz.
__________________________________________________ ________


It is well known that the Valar got married, and presumably had sex with each other. Sex is, after all, an integral part of marriage. That was mentioned on the other thread. My assumption about Sauron being asexual firstly came from me not imagining sex in my reading unless it is brought up by the author, but also because I don't believe that Sauron ever had any loves or crushes, courtships or whatnot. Before Sauron became The Eye, I always imagined him being a humanoid, and therefore he would have the parts to have sex. That was not the issue in my mind; I just thought that he would have never had the inclination to partake in it. He was very busy being evil and all, I assumed that he just didn't have the time.

Thinking this would be an interesting topic to discuss in its own thread, I am opening up sex for discussion. What do you think about the maiar having sex? Obviously, I did not think that Sauron would have been interested, but we do have examples of children being born to maiar, like Luthien, so therefore some of them were. Were other maiar interested in that intimacy too, or was Melian's case relatively isolated? Would the maiar be more interested in a mental connection to others, or a sexual one? As I muse over this, I would love to read all of your thoughts.

P.S. In answer to the original question, I don't think that wraiths would have been able to have sex. Their physical bodies have all but vanished, and that would make it impossible.

[burrahobbit]

This.

Besides that, I think it is important to point out that you failed to mention Luthien.

[Bêthberry]

Originally Posted by burrahobbit

Besides that, I think it is important to point out that you failed to mention Luthien.

But we do have Lush's immortal thread, Ooh la la, Lúthien....

One would assume that Tom and Goldberry--not that I'm calling them Maiar--had a fulfilling marriage. Yet we don't see any little Toms or Berrys.

[TheGreatElvenWarrior]

Originally Posted by Bêthberry

But we do have Lush's immortal thread, Ooh la la, Lúthien....

One would assume that Tom and Goldberry--not that I'm calling them Maiar--had a fulfilling marriage. Yet we don't see any little Toms or Berrys.

Shall we assume that contraception existed in Middle-earth, or that Goldberry was barren?

[Bêthberry]

Originally Posted by TheGreatElvenWarrior

Shall we assume that contraception existed in Middle-earth, or that Goldberry was barren?

Well, given that she was known for being deeply in touch with nature, doing rain dances and such, presumably she was proficient at the rhythm method.

[Morthoron]

Originally Posted by Bêthberry

Well, given that she was known for being deeply in touch with nature, doing rain dances and such, presumably she was proficient at the rhythm method.

Perhaps she had an arbortion.

[Galadriel55]

Originally Posted by Bêthberry

One would assume that Tom and Goldberry--not that I'm calling them Maiar--had a fulfilling marriage. Yet we don't see any little Toms or Berrys.

You might never know how many River-granddaughters are wandering about...

Seriously, though, I would like to bring up this nice little bit from The Sil:

But when they desire to clothe themselves the Valar take upon them forms some as of male and some as of female; for that difference of temper they had even from their beginning, and it is but bodied forth in the choice of each, not made by the choice, even as with us male and female may be shown by the raiment but is not made thereby. (Ainulindale)

So, while that says nothing of sex, the Valar clearly have genders (if you care to differentiate between the two, I think sex refers more towards your reproductive organs and gender more towards your disposition on the matter). If, however, I stick to those definitions, they beg a question: do the Valar necessarily have sexual organs? They are able to take on different shapes, and are able to move about without any shape at all. Now how do you biologically define that?! Melian bore a child, and IIRC in the earlier versions Manwe and Varda had a son Fionwe, so they're capable of having children if they wish to. I guess it depends on what form they take. But I would say that the connection between the Valar spouses is mostly mental.

I personally believe that taking a shape similar to a human does not necessarily give you human anatomy (f.ex., the Valar don't necessarily have two kidneys and a liver, and thus also don't necessarily have reproductiove organs). I guess that if they choose to be similar to the Children in that way, they may become so, like Melian did, but I prefer to think that they do not even bother themselves with such thoughts.

I wonder now if it's possible to have a hermaphrodite or androgynous ainu. (Seems from Agan's thread about Sauron's hair colour that the question of homosexuality is already decided on by Tumblr. )

(As a side note, you should have seen my facial expressions as I was typing all this! A family member who came into the room asked me if I'm ok. )

[Morthoron]

Originally Posted by TheGreatElvenWarrior

Sex is, after all, an integral part of marriage.

I take it you've never been married.

[Mirkgirl]

Saw that in fb and thought to give my 2 cents. Took a bit to find the time

To properly answer a question, one should know what is meant by the terms used. We know who Maiar are, Beings are only relevant if we want to discuss any specific being, but what is this "sex" thingy...
In the original question I see hints for 4 possible definitions.

Originally Posted by TheGreatElvenWarrior

It is well known that the Valar got married, and presumably had sex with each other. Sex is, after all, an integral part of marriage.

Ok, this is sex being that special one on one activity that couples do. (One of) The reason(s) they get together. Sex as a couple glue.

Originally Posted by TheGreatElvenWarrior

because I don't believe that Sauron ever had any loves or crushes, courtships or whatnot.

Sex as a physical pendant to love (or obsession).

Originally Posted by TheGreatElvenWarrior

Before Sauron became The Eye, I always imagined him being a humanoid, and therefore he would have the parts to have sex.

Sex as a physical activity.

Originally Posted by TheGreatElvenWarrior

but we do have examples of children being born to maiar, like Luthien, so therefore some of them were.

Sex as means to reproduce.

My answer depending on what that s-word means:

I. Couple Glue:
Sauron: Not interested in such thing. Wears only friend in his world on his finger until he looses both.
Valar: They surely had a couple thingy. Tantric sex that Sting hasn't dreamt of or something.
Maiar: Not as apparant as the Valar but probably yeah.

II. Love pendant (Obsession)
Sauron: The REAL baddies in Tolkien's world aren't some misunderstood emos (for which he has my respect). They don't love or obsesse over gals. EXCLUSION: While he was a blender, he might have faked it (if it was useful for him he would have).
Valar/Maiar: Dunno. Probably. Possibly. They want the couple thingy, after all?

III. Physical activity
Sauron: Surely. I mean why not? And the time argument is irrelevant if we exclude the love/obsession/couple thing.
Valar/Maiar: The ones that were happy to try new things surely... Unless it was binding to human form and/or the couple thingy was great enough.
Wizards: The time argument holds, as they will also engage in a love/couple thingy. The old age probably protected them from it. Saruman, just as Sauron, was a complete Baddy: yeah he prolly did it. He even got new clothes, as he probably tried to tell himself that the women actually liked him for himself.

IV. Reproduction
Sauron: Deffo not. Immortals probably had some way to controll this, as there was no overpopulation issue in ME. But he would probably kill his women and eat the babies before he conceives possible competition.
Valar: Couldn't. If the tantric thing was also as good as sting thinks - lucky bastards.
Maiar: Had probably something to do with choice.

[Zigûr]

Originally Posted by TheGreatElvenWarrior

Before Sauron became The Eye

I just noticed this. Is it a metaphorical statement? Surely it is well-established that Sauron was never just a big floating eyeball. Nonetheless I can't think that Sauron, whose first fixation was Order and later simply hatred for those who appeared to obstruct his vision of Order, would have had much interest in anything sexual even at his most incarnate level of spiritual degradation. Sauron seems to me to have been an obsessive person, who in the Third Age at least had two overriding goals: the conquest of the West of Middle-earth and the recovery of the Rings of Power (and especially, of course, the One Ring). He does not strike me as the kind of person who put those fixations aside for the sake of his leisure.

I am still convinced that the Ainur were largely asexual unless confined to a single incarnation, and that their marriages were based on a "purer" form of "gender-attraction" rather than the sexual attraction that Incarnates had to put up with. Again, it seems to me that Professor Tolkien considered sexuality to be in many cases a wearisome obstacle in the relations between men and women in this world ("The dislocation of sex-instinct is one of the chief symptoms of the Fall." (Letters p.48)) and that an emotionally intimate relationship between the two without sexuality would be an admirable thing. Hence in the secondary world Ainur couples would be "better" than Incarnate couples because they wouldn't have sexuality mediating the affection and compatibility of partners.

Likewise I am almost entirely sure that Professor Tolkien made a remark somewhere to the effect that marriages among the Ainur were non-sexual in nature (more explicitly than in the quote I've already provided in my previous post, that is) but I still cannot find it...

[Ardent]

Originally Posted by Zigûr

... He does not strike me as the kind of person who put those fixations aside for the sake of his leisure.

I am still convinced that the Ainur were largely asexual unless confined to a single incarnation, and that their marriages were based on a "purer" form of "gender-attraction" rather than the sexual attraction that Incarnates had to put up with...

I don't think Sauron or the Maia in general would consider sex as leisure. The reason being that, as you say, they already have a much greater level of intimacy which would make sex seem trivial.

Also, while I agree that sexual attraction among incarnate beings is something they/we have to "put up with" (ie. a drive with a power that can distract from 'higher' aspirations and duties) it is not a bad thing in itself. Rather its distractive power lies in its being a means by which Incarnates can experience, be it only fleetingly, that union of being which the Maiar/Valar live in. Theirs (including Morgoth and Sauron) is the Great Song that wove the world together:

"Hey! Come derry dol! Can you hear me singing?"


Of course there is still the notion that the Dark Lord might have abused sex as a means of asserting his will to power, but again I don't think it half as horrific as the threat of the Witch King:

"He [Sauron] will bear thee away to the houses of lamentation, beyond all darkness, where thy flesh shall be devoured, and thy shrivelled mind be left naked to the Lidless Eye."
The Battle of the Pelennor Fields
.

[Faramir Jones]

Originally Posted by Ardent

Of course there is still the notion that the Dark Lord might have abused sex as a means of asserting his will to power, but again I don't think it half as horrific as the threat of the Witch King:

"He [Sauron] will bear thee away to the houses of lamentation, beyond all darkness, where thy flesh shall be devoured, and thy shrivelled mind be left naked to the Lidless Eye."
The Battle of the Pelennor Fields.

Since I first read that passage, I've had an image of Sauron holding Eowyn's brain in his hands, along with the words 'mental abuse'.

[Mithalwen]

Originally Posted by Zigûr

I am still convinced that the Ainur were largely asexual unless confined to a single incarnation, and that their marriages were based on a "purer" form of "gender-attraction" rather than the sexual attraction that Incarnates had to put up with. Again, it seems to me that Professor Tolkien considered sexuality to be in many cases a wearisome obstacle in the relations between men and women in this world ("The dislocation of sex-instinct is one of the chief symptoms of the Fall." (Letters p.48)) and that an emotionally intimate relationship between the two without sexuality would be an admirable thing. Hence in the secondary world Ainur couples would be "better" than Incarnate couples because they wouldn't have sexuality mediating the affection and compatibility of partners.

Likewise I am almost entirely sure that Professor Tolkien made a remark somewhere to the effect that marriages among the Ainur were non-sexual in nature (more explicitly than in the quote I've already provided in my previous post, that is) but I still cannot find it...

I think the crucial word in the first quotation is dislocation, literally meaning out of place. I have a feeling Tolkien said in one of his letters that "it was a pity it was ever a sin". In the HoME essay "The laws and customs of the Eldar" he makes it very clear that Elves enjoy sex but it is pretty much a phase in their lives and once they have got it out of their system and had all the children they wanted they devote their creative instincts to other things. Also seems from the same essay that conception is an act of will. Since the sexual act is an essential part of contracting an Elvish marriage and there is often a lengthy spell between marriage and the birth of children it would also seem that Elves had sex for pleasure / pair bonding reasons rather than merely to reproduce. However their relationships were faithful and exclusive so this may indeed represent an ideal of being able to have close relationships with others without affecting the integrity of the marital relationship. Something which is indeed hard for mortals to do.

Of course immortals don't have the biological imperative that affects mortals who live on in their children so they will be less driven by their hormones. Elvish spirits are much more in control of their bodies and as they age the spirit takes precedence IIRC.

And what is true for elves is likely to be true to a even greater degree for the Valar so I agree that the Ainur are not likely to be affected by desires of the flesh and that the lust of Sauron is more likely to be about the desire to overpower, possess and exert control rather than about sex per se.

[Aganzir]

My take on this is that if there's no sex, why call it marriage? There are other quite sufficient words - why not call it friendship instead?

Originally Posted by Bêthberry

One would assume that Tom and Goldberry--not that I'm calling them Maiar--had a fulfilling marriage. Yet we don't see any little Toms or Berrys.

Well, as Mith pointed out later, conception seems to be an act of will. However, they've probably lived in the Old Forest long enough for every potential little Tom and Berry to leave the nest - they do have the spare bedroom, and it's not like they could really expect to entertain visitors that often.

Originally Posted by Galadriel55

I wonder now if it's possible to have a hermaphrodite or androgynous ainu. (Seems from Agan's thread about Sauron's hair colour that the question of homosexuality is already decided on by Tumblr. :-D)

I am afraid Tolkien implied quite clearly in Laws and Customs that at least the Eldar experienced solely opposite sex attraction:

Nonetheless marriage concerns also the fëar. For the fëar of the Elves are of their nature male and female, and not their hrondor only. And the beginning of marriage is in the affinity of the fëar, and in the love arising therefrom. And this love includes in it, from its first awakening, the desire for marriage, and is therefore like to but not in all ways the same as other motions of love and friendship, even those between Elves of male and female nature who do not have this inclination.

However, I must point out that it says nothing about the Elves who are not of the Three Kindreds, or about any other races either.

I think the Ainur's incarnations are too closely knitted with their fëar to allow sex changes, but I wouldn't rule it out that Arda Marred would occasionally see fëar born in the wrong body.

Originally Posted by Eönwë

Of course, the issue then is of the nature of the fëa of the child. It depends how new fëar are created (which would make an interesting discussion in its own right), and whether they come from Eru or are a product of their parents in some way as well.

Tolkien talks about fëa acquisition in Laws and Customs:

Now the Eldar hold that to each elf-child a new fëa is given, not akin to the fëar of the parents (save in belonging to the same order and nature); and this fëa either did not exist before birth, or is the fëa of one that is re-born. The new fëa, and therefore in the beginning all fëar, they believe to come direct from Eru and from beyond Eä.

There was also an idea about the parents' fëar affecting and nourishing the child's fëa (just like their hrondor, bodies, did). Also as cited in The Lost Road, according to Manwë's judgement, Dior was mortal irrespective of the choice of Lúthien. This implies that the children of mixed race unions had the fëar of the 'lesser' parent, and Maia/elf, Maia/eagle, Maia/orc children, such as they were, would effectively have been something else than Maiar.

Originally Posted by Eönwë

I never thought of them as sexual, but now, after thinking about how they had to actually live in the bodies of Men, I would assume that they were also fully functional in that department.

In the bodies of old Men. That kind of ruins your assumption.

Originally Posted by Eönwë

As for other incarnates, I think it's more vague. What about about Balrogs? Would they have sexual organs? And if so, why? Or would Morgoth have denied them those to stop them getting 'distracted'?

I don't think Melkor could have denied them the form they chose. Rather, they took it according to a combination of what felt good to them and how they believed they could best serve him. Also, as has been quoted, they had different tempers from the beginning, and if they had sexual desires, it would've shown in their incarnation and Melkor couldn't have done anything to keep them from being distracted anyway.
Speaking of the fire Maiar, Arien didn't show a particular interest in romance either, so it may have been some spirit of fire thing.

Originally Posted by William Cloud Hicklin

In earlier writings Tolkien conceived of the Valar as having children, notably Fionwe (later Eonwe) and Kosomot (>Gothmog) "son of Melko"; but he changed his mind and converted the Children of the Valar into the Maiar.

There were children and children. In the Later Annals of Beleriand Oromë is said to be born of Yavanna but he is not Aulë's son, but it was later altered:

and Oromë was the offspring of Yavanna, who is after named, but not as the Children of the Gods are born in this world, for he came of her thought ere the world was made.

So while this idea may have been abandoned later, it illustrates two concepts: that of the Valar getting children the ordinary, physical way; and the one that focuses on the Valar as spiritual beings.

Originally Posted by Zigûr

the marriages of the Valar (and Maiar) were not completely comparable to those of the Children of Ilúvatar, which is to say that they were based more on compatibility in the thought of Eru than bearing some physical element of attraction.

I don't necessarily agree. Tilion loved (or desired) Arien, but his feelings were clearly unrequited. It couldn't therefore have been a question of compatibility.

Also, there were some couples that were married from either the creation of the Ainur or the beginning of Arda, depending on what you consider canon, such as Manwë and Varda, but there were also those who only got married later, like Tulkas and Nessa. Personally I find it more probable that there was a period of flirting/courting and 'you+me=swoon' before the wedding rather than a sudden discovery that they were just, you know, really compatible in Ilúvatar's thought.

Originally Posted by Ardent

I don't think Sauron or the Maia in general would consider sex as leisure. The reason being that, as you say, they already have a much greater level of intimacy which would make sex seem trivial.

This is true, but it doesn't have to exclude sex altogether. You ask what reason they had to have sex when there were other levels of intimacy, but then again, what reason did they have not to? They enjoyed song and dance too, and even though (as Galin pointed out) these were not binding while conceiving and begetting were, they were still pleasures. Enlighten a non-native English speaker here, but do conceiving and begetting mean the act of making love as well as that of actually making babies (and the many other things Lal said).

Originally Posted by Mithalwen

I think the crucial word in the first quotation is dislocation, literally meaning out of place. I have a feeling Tolkien said in one of his letters that "it was a pity it was ever a sin". In the HoME essay "The laws and customs of the Eldar" he makes it very clear that Elves enjoy sex but it is pretty much a phase in their lives and once they have got it out of their system and had all the children they wanted they devote their creative instincts to other things. Also seems from the same essay that conception is an act of will. Since the sexual act is an essential part of contracting an Elvish marriage and there is often a lengthy spell between marriage and the birth of children it would also seem that Elves had sex for pleasure / pair bonding reasons rather than merely to reproduce.

Good points.

[Kuruharan]

Originally Posted by Aganzir

Enlighten a non-native English speaker here, but do conceiving and begetting mean the act of making love as well as that of actually making babies (and the many other things Lal said).

The use can be a bit idiosyncratic, but the proper definitions of the words explicitly mean "baby making" and not just making love.

[Ardent]

Originally Posted by Aganzir

...it doesn't have to exclude sex altogether. You ask what reason they had to have sex when there were other levels of intimacy, but then again, what reason did they have not to?

... Enlighten a non-native English speaker here, but do conceiving and begetting mean the act of making love as well as that of actually making babies (and the many other things Lal said)...

I did not intend to imply that the Maiar or Eldar did not enjoy sex, only that their memory of a higher state of being, a state of "at one-ness", would have made it more difficult for sex to become a ruling passion.

As for conceiving and begetting, both are terms which we use to avoid the idea of sex. They are 'detached' terms, the chief difference between them is that "conceive" is associated more with female nature and "begat" with the male. That said, only a woman can conceive a baby, but anyone can conceive an idea, as Eru conceived the world, while begat is something you wear on a big 'ed.

.

[Morthoron]

Perhaps they just preferred Ainul sex.

Sorry, I just can't be serious with this topic.

[Bêthberry]

Originally Posted by Mithalwen

In the HoME essay "The laws and customs of the Eldar" he makes it very clear that Elves enjoy sex but it is pretty much a phase in their lives and once they have got it out of their system and had all the children they wanted they devote their creative instincts to other things. Also seems from the same essay that conception is an act of will.
Since the sexual act is an essential part of contracting an Elvish marriage and there is often a lengthy spell between marriage and the birth of children it would also seem that Elves had sex for pleasure / pair bonding reasons rather than merely to reproduce.

I've added the bolding here to Mithalwen's post,because it is the part I wish to discuss in particular.

If conception amongst the elves is an act of will, that is, if elves procreative only when they choose to procreate, does that not mean that Eru isn't part of the procreation? It would appear to be another version of the free will question.

That would appear to differ from at least some Christian ideology which claims that all pregnancies derive from God. Not that Tolkien's legendarium can't differ. Just an observation.

Originally Posted by Aganzir

In the bodies of old Men. That kind of ruins your assumption.

Agan, just how many old men have you known? Oh, wait a minute. That sounds too much like knowing in the biblical sense and too personal. Forget it.

Let me put it this way instead.

Is it in fact a valid assumption that old people no longer enjoy sexual relations?

[Galadriel55]

Originally Posted by Bêthberry

Is it in fact a valid assumption that old people no longer enjoy sexual relations?

We mustn't forget the late Lord Frey.

[Aganzir]

Originally Posted by Bêthberry

Agan, just how many old men have you known? Oh, wait a minute. That sounds too much like knowing in the biblical sense and too personal. Forget it.

Let me put it this way instead.

Is it in fact a valid assumption that old people no longer enjoy sexual relations?

My dearest B-B, it was never my intention to imply that. I was speaking about old as in 'thousands of years old', which, you have to admit, might make some difference, even if not in the upper department.

(And yes, your original phrasing made me take a second look, but since I'm not an Ainu, this is not the time nor place. Suffice to say, I find it unlikely I'll ever know any man as old as Gandalf. )

As for procreation of free will, there's this part in Laws and Customs which is quite interesting:

There were seldom more than four children in any house, and the number grew less as ages passed; but even in days of old, while the Eldar were still few, and eager to increase their kind, (included in first version: before the weight of years lay on them), Fëanor was renowned as the father of seven sons, and the histories record none that surpassed him.

I see two possible explanations here:

1. Only First Age Elves were eager to increase their kind
2. Ilúvatar was eager to avoid overpopulation later

The text basically says that either the former is true, or the Eldar spent a considerable amount of their time in the bedroom in the First Age.

Originally Posted by Galadriel55

We mustn't forget the late Lord Frey.

And you remember why he was called so? Because he came late.
Sorry.

[Faramir Jones]

Originally Posted by Bêthberry

Is it in fact a valid assumption that old people no longer enjoy sexual relations?

You asked a good question, Bêthberry; but the problem is that in the case of the Ringwraiths you can't compare like with like. They ceased to be Men centuries ago, thanks to the Nine which prolonged their lives and turned them into wraiths, although they may still look that way.

In the same way Smeagol, due to the influence of the One Ring, from being a hobbit came to be something else, his life prolonged far beyond what was normal for his race. I liked the fact that Tolkien never called Gollum a hobbit, only saying once that he might look like a very ancient hobbit.

[TheGreatElvenWarrior]

I did not have the time earlier to read everyone's responses to this thread, but I am glad that it sparked a good (and mostly serious ) discussion. I don't have much to add, but I enjoyed reading quotes from the Tolkien books that I haven't read (I don't have a complete HoME).

One thing to add here:

Originally Posted by Bêthberry

Is it in fact a valid assumption that old people no longer enjoy sexual relations?

There were cases of American Civil War veterans taking wives as recently as the 1930's, and the man who owns the company that my father works at is probably ninety years old and has an eight-year-old son. That being said, I don't think that the Istari would have come to Middle-earth with sexual desires. Such desires could become a distraction from their mission, and I don't think that the Valar nor the wizards would have set out without thought for that.

After reading this thread, my current opinion is that the "higher" beings in Middle-earth had the power to either desire or not desire intimacy with each other. I still can't see Sauron having any inclination to perform the act of sex. My feelings on the physical bodies of these beings (when they are in a humaniod state, anyway) are thus: they had bodies that worked much the same as ours. Going back to eating and drinking, we know that the Valar, for instance, ate and drank, so therefore they must have needed a digestive tract and some way to dispose of their waste, so why not also have reproductive organs?

[Legate of Amon Lanc]

Originally Posted by TheGreatElvenWarrior

That being said, I don't think that the Istari would have come to Middle-earth with sexual desires. Such desires could become a distraction from their mission, and I don't think that the Valar nor the wizards would have set out without thought for that.

No, that is exactly the point! The Wizards, and it is stated explicitly, were incarnate for a reason. They were exposed to all possible problems (and delights) mortal inhabitants of M-E could face. To put it in a more straightforward manner, it is not unimaginable for me to have a Wizard decide (Melianesque, if you find that easier to imagine with such comparison) "hey, I found a wonderful mortal woman and we fell in love and I want to spend my life with her in a cottage hidden in the mountains, screw the war with Sauron". It would not be any different from, for instance, Radagast deciding that he'd rather spend his days tramping in the wilderness.

[Bêthberry]

Originally Posted by TheGreatElvenWarrior

There were cases of American Civil War veterans taking wives as recently as the 1930's, and the man who owns the company that my father works at is probably ninety years old and has an eight-year-old son. That being said, I don't think that the Istari would have come to Middle-earth with sexual desires. Such desires could become a distraction from their mission, and I don't think that the Valar nor the wizards would have set out without thought for that.

Originally Posted by Legate of Amon Lanc

I guess that would come back to what you were talking about with Bethberry, and with which I agree, as in, by no means would I want to diminish any sexual desires among older people, but generally it probably isn't as common or as strong, and with this I would say that the Wizards were indeed not of "that cathegory" and so their distractions would come from different hobbies, interests, and so on. Especially if you take into account that they were in the position of having an entirely new world to explore, literally.

I think it is probably not too remiss to point out that in the human species there are differences in the development of sexual appetites of the sexes, with women peaking much later than men. In medieval literature (Chaucer comes to mind) the elderly who still pursue sexual appetite are ridiculed, but that is a cultural value rather than normative behaviour.

[must go find something I want to reply to Aganzir now, so will edit this later.]