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Old 02-29-2008, 01:46 PM   #1
Tar-Elara
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Location: Barad-Dur, hurling something at those blasted, noisy orcs....
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Tar-Elara has just left Hobbiton.
Dark-Eye Worst Middle Earth Occupations

While doing rather meaningless tasks at my job, I began to wonder what the worst occupations in Middle Earth would look like. Here is what I have come up with so far:

1. Dentist to the Mouth of Sauron.
2. Shire Nutritionist.
3. Harbinger of bad news to Morgoth.
4. Feanor’s anger management coach.
5. Orkin man in the realm of Mordor.
6. Polisher of Grond.

Please add on if you wish....
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Old 02-29-2008, 01:53 PM   #2
Mithalwen
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Join Date: May 2004
Location: watching the wonga-wonga birds circle...
Posts: 9,458
Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Well if we can stretch Middle Earth to include Numenor then I should think that being Aldarion and Erendis' marriage guidance counsellor would have been a bit of a challenge...
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Old 03-04-2008, 04:04 AM   #3
Eomer of the Rohirrim
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Location: The Netherlands
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Eomer of the Rohirrim is a guest at the Prancing Pony.Eomer of the Rohirrim is a guest at the Prancing Pony.
Shield

Nice thread.

Balrog dance-instructor.
Go-between for Ent negotiations.
Orc lawyer.
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Old 03-04-2008, 12:18 PM   #4
Tar-Elara
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Location: Barad-Dur, hurling something at those blasted, noisy orcs....
Posts: 5
Tar-Elara has just left Hobbiton.
hehe. Absolutely hilarious, yet slightly disturbing, image of a Balrog in a pink tutu!
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Old 03-10-2008, 04:21 PM   #5
Hookbill the Goomba
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

- Hobbit dietician

- Oliphant cage cleaner

- Elven funeral director (not much business, really... They are actually behind a lot of the wars the Elves get into)

- Sauron's optician.
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Old 03-11-2008, 07:10 AM   #6
MaultheStoor
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: The cave under the Misty Mountains. Just take a wrong turn in the goblin's tunnels.
Posts: 34
MaultheStoor is still gossiping in the Green Dragon.
I feel sorry for whoever had to clean Sauron's contact lenses. I also feel sorry for Gollum's therapist.
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Old 03-17-2008, 01:20 PM   #7
Elmo
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: trying to find that warm and winding lane again
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Elmo has just left Hobbiton.
Captain of the last ship into Numenor.

Gothmog troll bodyguard.

Fangorn forester.
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Old 03-19-2008, 07:58 AM   #8
Valesse
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Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: |Away
Posts: 614
Valesse has just left Hobbiton.
-Mordorian census-taker.
-Barad-dur marketing representive.
-Highway patrol. Anywhere.
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Old 05-14-2008, 10:30 PM   #9
Morgoth's Apprentice
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Location: In Angband, chillin with Morgoth and learning how to take over the world
Posts: 38
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Dark-Eye

- moving target practice for Elven archers
- the messenger that told Morgoth the Valar were coming
- a defender of Osgiliath
-an Elf set to guard Gollum
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Old 05-14-2008, 10:53 PM   #10
Morgoth's Apprentice
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Location: In Angband, chillin with Morgoth and learning how to take over the world
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Dark-Eye

- moving target practice for Elven archers
- the messenger that told Morgoth the Valar were coming
- a defender of Osgiliath
-an Elf set to guard Gollum
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