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02-29-2008, 01:46 PM | #1 |
Newly Deceased
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Barad-Dur, hurling something at those blasted, noisy orcs....
Posts: 5
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Worst Middle Earth Occupations
While doing rather meaningless tasks at my job, I began to wonder what the worst occupations in Middle Earth would look like. Here is what I have come up with so far:
1. Dentist to the Mouth of Sauron. 2. Shire Nutritionist. 3. Harbinger of bad news to Morgoth. 4. Feanor’s anger management coach. 5. Orkin man in the realm of Mordor. 6. Polisher of Grond. Please add on if you wish.... |
02-29-2008, 01:53 PM | #2 |
Pilgrim Soul
Join Date: May 2004
Location: watching the wonga-wonga birds circle...
Posts: 9,458
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Well if we can stretch Middle Earth to include Numenor then I should think that being Aldarion and Erendis' marriage guidance counsellor would have been a bit of a challenge...
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“But Finrod walks with Finarfin his father beneath the trees in Eldamar.”
Christopher Tolkien, Requiescat in pace |
03-04-2008, 04:04 AM | #3 |
Auspicious Wraith
Join Date: May 2002
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 4,859
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Nice thread.
Balrog dance-instructor. Go-between for Ent negotiations. Orc lawyer.
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Los Ingobernables de Harlond |
03-04-2008, 12:18 PM | #4 |
Newly Deceased
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Barad-Dur, hurling something at those blasted, noisy orcs....
Posts: 5
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hehe. Absolutely hilarious, yet slightly disturbing, image of a Balrog in a pink tutu!
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03-10-2008, 04:21 PM | #5 |
Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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- Hobbit dietician
- Oliphant cage cleaner - Elven funeral director (not much business, really... They are actually behind a lot of the wars the Elves get into) - Sauron's optician.
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
03-11-2008, 07:10 AM | #6 |
Animated Skeleton
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: The cave under the Misty Mountains. Just take a wrong turn in the goblin's tunnels.
Posts: 34
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I feel sorry for whoever had to clean Sauron's contact lenses. I also feel sorry for Gollum's therapist.
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Leave now, and never come back! Gollum, Gollum! See? You made him mad. |
03-17-2008, 01:20 PM | #7 |
Pittodrie Poltergeist
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: trying to find that warm and winding lane again
Posts: 633
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Captain of the last ship into Numenor.
Gothmog troll bodyguard. Fangorn forester.
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As Beren looked into her eyes within the shadows of her hair, The trembling starlight of the skies he saw there mirrored shimmering. |
03-19-2008, 07:58 AM | #8 |
Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: |Away
Posts: 614
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-Mordorian census-taker.
-Barad-dur marketing representive. -Highway patrol. Anywhere.
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"Loo, what sholde a man in thyse dayes now wryte, 'egges' or 'eyren'?" - Caxton, Eneydos
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05-14-2008, 10:30 PM | #9 |
Animated Skeleton
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- moving target practice for Elven archers
- the messenger that told Morgoth the Valar were coming - a defender of Osgiliath -an Elf set to guard Gollum |
05-14-2008, 10:53 PM | #10 |
Animated Skeleton
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- moving target practice for Elven archers
- the messenger that told Morgoth the Valar were coming - a defender of Osgiliath -an Elf set to guard Gollum |
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