Visit The *EVEN NEWER* Barrow-Downs Photo Page |
|
09-09-2004, 12:10 PM | #1 |
Lost among the Stars
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Hiding in Childhood (Sweden)
Posts: 2,690
|
The poem of Gil-Galad
In FotR Sam tells it on Weathertop. I made a new version of it. Feel free to criticize me!
Gil-Galad was a king of elves Between the grey waves and the shelves Of the Misty Mountains. Free his land The fairest realm that yet did stand A mighty sword, a deadly lance That many orcs upon did glance His helmet bright and shield with stars Protected him from many scars But who can tell which path he goes And where he wanders noone knows His star was left alone to die In Mordor, where the shadows lie ************************************************* I decided to add the original one as well, just for comparision: ************************************************* Gil-Galad was an elven king Of him the harpers sadly sing The last whose realm was fair and free Between the mountains and the sea His sword was long, his lance was keen His shining helm afar was seen The countless stars of heaven's field Were mirrored in his silver shield But long ago he rode away And where he dwelleth none can say For into darkness fell his star In Mordor, where the shadows are
__________________
There are three kinds of people in this world. Those who can count, and those who can't. |
09-09-2004, 01:23 PM | #2 |
Laconic Loreman
|
Very likeable...
First, I will comment about the original Gil-galad poem. Anytime I get to the "His sword was long, his lance was keen, his shinging helm afar was seen..." I just want to sing it in the Gulligan Island's theme song, well the beat of the theme song.
Anyway, on you poem NightKnight, I actually think it was well done, and some of the phrases you use like "deadly lance, That many orcs upon did glance" and "His helmet bright and shield with stars, Protected him from many scars," add sort of a little comedy into the poem. |
09-09-2004, 02:25 PM | #3 |
Lost among the Stars
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Hiding in Childhood (Sweden)
Posts: 2,690
|
Thank you.
I just love "The countless stars of heaven's field/Were mirrored in his silver shield". It was impossible to even get close to it.
__________________
There are three kinds of people in this world. Those who can count, and those who can't. |
09-09-2004, 08:28 PM | #4 |
Bittersweet Symphony
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: On the jolly starship Enterprise
Posts: 1,814
|
Well done, NK! Good meter and rhyming.
I reread the end of the Sil and loved the part about Maglor wandering and singing laments on the shores of the Sea, so I decided to try and write one... granted, it won't be in elvish, but it's pretty good so far. It's basically about everything that happened to Maglor and the deaths of his father and brothers through the curse of the Oath. I've only got around 40 lines so far... writing in couplets for a long while is hard! I tried to follow the style of the Lay of Leithian... let's just say that Tolkien was truly the master of rhymes. |
09-10-2004, 10:27 PM | #5 |
Wight
|
That was really good, NightKnight!
I, too, have given in to the temptation to write my own Middle-earth poetry. I wrote a pretty short one about Boromir and a longer one on the fall of Gondolin that I'm pretty proud of. And I tried to write one about the death of Fingolfin, but only managed to come up with the final three lines. I find that I tend to come up with the last lines of my poems first. It's kinda odd.
__________________
"'...Home is the sailor, home from the sea, And the hunter home from the hill.'" |
09-11-2004, 03:38 AM | #6 |
Lost among the Stars
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Hiding in Childhood (Sweden)
Posts: 2,690
|
Encaitare and Lachwen, can you post them? It would be really nice to read them. And thanks for liking it.
__________________
There are three kinds of people in this world. Those who can count, and those who can't. |
|
|